Showing results by publisher "--Tyson Hanks" in Humorous

Koom Valley, the ancient battle where the trolls ambushed the dwarfs, or the dwarfs ambushed the trolls, was a long time ago. But if he doesn't solve the murder of just one dwarf, Commander Sam Vimes of Ankh-Morpork City Watch is going to see it fought again, right outside his office. With his beloved Watch crumbling around him and war-drums sounding, he must unravel every clue, outwit every assassin and brave any darkness to find the solution. And darkness is following him.

To earn his pardon and avoid becoming yet another necromancer statistic, Timmy has to work for the Council. From bandit uprisings to giant sea serpents and ogre invasions, Timmy and the others are there to save the day - sort of. When the dragon egg their resident pyromaniac stole hatches to reveal the world’s cuddliest harbinger of death, Timmy and the others are dragged into a pair of diabolically dangerous missions. Breaking out of one of the world’s most secure prisons was hard enough. Now, they have to break back in to rescue a vampire.

Everybody knows there's no such thing as a female wizard. So when the wizard Drum Billet accidentally passes on his staff of power to an eighth daughter of an eighth son, a girl called Eskarina (Esk, for short), the misogynistic world of wizardry wants nothing to do with her.

The dungeon is surrounded, the refugees have made it to safety, but...they need food, water, space to recover and rest, and none of these things come cheap. That cost must be paid in mana. Mike and Kelly were sent to bring reinforcements from the park, but they're walking into a meatgrinder, one that will strip the life from them, then raise them to besiege those they love. Matt has only one chance...lead the refugees, forge them anew into a force that can face the undead, in their tens of thousands.

Jackal is proud to be a Grey Bastard, member of a sworn brotherhood of half-orcs. Unloved and unwanted in civilized society, the Bastards eke out a hard life in the desolate no-man's-land called the Lots, protecting frail and noble human civilization from invading bands of vicious full-blooded orcs. But as Jackal is soon to learn, his pride may be misplaced. Because a dark secret lies at the heart of the Bastards' existence - one that reveals a horrifying truth behind humanity's tenuous peace with the orcs, and exposes a grave danger on the horizon.

The devil has been bested. Zeryesis tried his damnedest, but Lulu’s life is back in her hands. No longer must she spend every month worrying about becoming a slave, and it’s all thanks to Steve (not that he’ll admit it). He’s too busy focusing on the future—turning the farm from a hovel into the best around. But that’s easier said than done.

Back when things were normal, Orrin the Timid tried saving his best friend, Daniel the Popular, from a runaway truck. But he failed, and the resulting crash landed them both in a world of magic, monsters, and levels. There, Orrin grew from a mild-mannered sidekick into a legit powerhouse, unlocking Administrator-level powers unlike anything else. Still, things are tough for the former zero.

Osric Mordaunt, member of the Fyren Order of assassins, is in dire need of healing. Naturally - such is the grim comedy of fate - the only healer who can help is Aurienne Fairhrim, preeminent scientist, bastion of moral good, and member of an enemy Order. Aurienne is desperate for funding to heal the sick - so desperate that, when Osric bribes her to help him, she accepts, even if she detests him and everything he stands for.

Insurrection is in the air in the city of Ankh-Morpork. The Haves and Have-Nots are about to fall out all over again. Captain Sam Vimes of the city's ramshackle Night Watch is used to this. It's enough to drive a man to drink. Well, to drink more. But this time, something is different - the Have-Nots have found the key to a dormant, lethal weapon that even they don't fully understand and they're about to unleash a campaign of terror on the city. Time for Captain Vimes to sober up.

'And God said, Let there be light; and there was light, but Eastern Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.' There have been many interpretations of the Old Testament over the centuries but never one quite like this. Spike Milligan has rewritten, in his own inimitable style, many of the best-known stories of the Old Testament, featuring characters like King 'my brain hurts' Solomon; the great oaf of a giant, Goliath; and the lesser-known crossword clue, Hushai the Archite.

Milo needed a break from fighting giant monsters, insane wizards, and the constant gang warfare of Shadowport. The World Boss he'd accidentally woken up was dead. The annoying wizard who'd captured him was lost in the void along with his annoying little dragon, his airship stolen, and his library destroyed. That left him free to go exploring in the dark tunnels beneath the city. He'd thought that as a were-rat he was unique, but he's heard a rumor of a small town of ratkin living beneath the city and sets out to find it.

I'm the new owner of a magical mansion. This mansion, well, it's not your typical building. It's a dungeon from another world, masquerading as just another private residence in the suburbs. It has enchanted rooms, can craft powerful items, build lethal traps, and produce incredible monsters. And it's my mission to protect and evolve its monstrous inhabitants.

In the months since Draka woke up as a dragon in another world, much has changed. She's formed friendships, built alliances, navigated the magic and politics of her new home, and discovered how to wield some of her more useful draconic abilities. But even as her powers evolve, she finds herself contending with ever more perilous trials.

When Aesca Lampi wakes up in the form of her character from Eldest Fantasy Wars Online, she's annoyed by the historical inaccuracies. (Video-game-style scrolls? Really?) That is, until a building collapses on top of her, revealing she's on a fantastical island centered around the impossibly tall, glowing Tower of Aetherius . . . with an array of dangerous creatures—including jaguar hybrids, velociraptors, and giant, flesh-eating lizards—in the way. (Oh, joy.)

With her new product line launched and an updated version of her suit to test, Tori Rivas is ready to focus on her work for a while. But when an eruption of power elsewhere in the multiverse sends monsters bursting into her world, the young villain will find herself in the crosshairs of an unexpected invader.

Vienna, 1911. Gustav Klimt, the most famous painter in the Austrian Empire, the darling of Viennese society, spots a woman’s nude body in the Danube canal. He knows he should summon a policeman, but he can’t resist stopping to make a sketch first. And as he draws, the woman coughs. She’s alive! Back at his studio, Klimt and his model-turned-muse Wally tend to the erstwhile-drowned girl. She’s nearly feral and doesn’t remember who she is, or how she came to be floating in the canal. Klimt names her Judith, after one of his most famous paintings, and resolves to help her find her memory.

In a world full of superpowers, Felix had a pretty crappy one. He has the ability to modify any item he owns and to upgrade anything. Sounds great on paper; almost like a video game. Except that the amount of power it takes to actually change, modify, or upgrade anything worthwhile is beyond his abilities. At least, that was until Felix leveraged a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to give himself a great deal of points. Investing in, owning, and using Super Heroes and Super Villains, Felix built up an empire: an organization by the name of Legion.

The second instalment of The Riftwar Legacy, Assassins reveals Feist at his storytelling best. There is intrigue, humour, and breakneck action aplenty here from the undisputed master of epic fantasy. Fresh back from the front, another foe defeated, Prince Arutha arrives to find all is not well in Krondor. A series of apparently random murders has brought an eerie quiet to the city.

The Questing Stones have come to Nowherested, and Evelia Greene is finally ready to receive her life's quest. Perhaps she'll be a great warrior, or a wealthy merchant, or a brilliant mage. Perhaps her quest is simply to live a quiet life, constantly honing a craft to the heights of perfection. Or perhaps the Questing Stones will grant her the legendary mission of popping over to the next village to pick up a loaf of bread.

Clay Cooper and his band were once the best of the best - the meanest, dirtiest, most feared and admired crew of mercenaries this side of the Heartwyld. But their glory days are long past; the mercs have grown apart and grown old, fat, drunk - or a combination of the three. Then a former bandmate turns up at Clay's door with a plea for help: his daughter Rose is trapped in a city besieged by an enemy horde 100,000 strong and hungry for blood.