Showing results by author "Dustin Gross" in All Categories

Jesus, Don’t Let Me Cuss in Church is a blunt, funny, and deeply pastoral field guide for believers who keep screwing up and still keep showing up. Dustin Gross drops the church mask and tells the truth about doubt, anger, panic, and the pressure to perform holiness—then points to a Jesus who isn’t impressed by our act and isn’t afraid of our honesty.

Love watches but don’t have a trust fund? Think collecting great timepieces means spending thousands? Think again. Watches for the Rest of Us is the ultimate guide to building a killer watch collection—without breaking the bank. From $50 Casios to $500 Seikos, this book shows you how to find hidden gems, avoid scams, and buy the right watches for the right reasons—all while keeping your bank account intact.

Drink Like a Legend. Or at Least Like a Pirate. Rum is more than just a drink—it’s a lifestyle, a statement, and possibly the best bad decision you’ll ever make. Whether you’re a rum rookie or a seasoned sipper, this book delivers hard-earned wisdom, hilarious insights, and a guide to drinking rum like a legend.

Ancient Egypt was a mess. The gods were dramatic, the afterlife was full of bureaucratic nightmares, and crocodiles were way too involved in politics. Packed with sarcastic commentary, ridiculous myths, and historically accurate nonsense, this book is perfect for history nerds, mythology fans, and anyone who loves their gods with a side of snark. Whether you're a mythology expert or just here for the chaos, Holy Crocodiles! is your ultimate crash course in divine dysfunction.

Traditional worship told you to sit still, be quiet, and focus. Your brain didn’t get the memo. If church overstimulates you, if “quiet time” feels like torture, and if your prayers arrive in tangents, you are not broken—you’re neurodivergent. And your way of worship can be just as holy. Neurodivergent Spirituality: When Traditional Worship Doesn’t Work for Your Brain tears down the myth of the “perfect worshipper” and replaces it with a biblical, practical vision of faith that fits real bodies and real brains.

"The Great Antarctic Mystery" follows Traci the Penguin, her adventurous husband Dustin, and their curious daughter Lizzie as they embark on a journey inspired by a glowing, ancient map Dustin discovers.

What do you get when you mix a cranky God, a bunch of emotionally fragile prophets, 613 commandments, and a whole lot of carbs? A sacred mess called Judaism—and this hilariously dysfunctional guide is here to make sense of it all. In Oy Vey Almighty, we dive headfirst into the wonders and weirdness of Jewish faith, history, rituals, and culture—from Abraham’s awkward parenting to Moses' divine burnout, from Shabbat naps to Passover plagues.

Jax hates stools. He hates counters that are chest-high. But mostly, he hates not getting paid. Captain Jax is a pilot with a Napoleon complex and a corvette held together by duct tape and lizard spit. He’s five-foot-six of pure spite in a galaxy built for giants. When a slime-mold broker offers him a retirement-level payday to transport a "biological sample" to the edge of the Drift, Jax doesn’t ask questions. He just wants the credits.

Healing isn't a miracle. It’s a transaction. Malakai Vane is not a "white mage." He doesn't pray, he doesn't sparkle, and he doesn't do charity. He is a combat medic who knows the one immutable law of magic: The Tax.

What if Jesus was cloned… and didn’t want to save the world? In the neon-drenched dystopia of 2144, spirituality is a subscription service, and megachurches sell miracles like fast food. Meet Jesus 3. 0, the latest cloned messiah, who’s more anxious human than divine savior. Teamed with Sadie Vox, a jaded ex-pastor, Gary, a foul-mouthed donkey prophet, and Bishop Synth, a sentient AI toaster, Jesus must navigate a world where faith is a brand and love is a liability.

Whether you’re a whiskey newbie, a seasoned drinker, or just someone who wants to sound smart while ordering a dram, Whiskey & Shenanigans is the ultimate guide to enjoying whiskey without the pretentious nonsense. Whiskey is for everyone—not just tweed-wearing snobs who "detect notes of old leather and regret." Whether you drink it neat, on the rocks, or in a cocktail, this book will help you appreciate whiskey, laugh a lot, and maybe even impress your friends.

Meet Ruby Rose, a 2010 Kia Soul with a sassy attitude and a knack for storytelling. When Traci, a frazzled mom, and her glitter-obsessed daughter Lizzie embark on a cross-country journey from Oklahoma to California, Ruby’s not just their ride—she’s their guide through life’s wild detours. From squirrel heists to disco RVs, this funny road trip novel is packed with quirky characters, absurd mishaps, and heartfelt moments.

Kevin of No Particular Skills never asked to be the Chosen One. He just wanted to tend his cabbages and use the outhouse in peace. But when a flaming prophet crashes into his field screaming about world-ending darkness, Kevin is thrust into a quest he never wanted—with a magical talking sword named Wendy (who really wants to cuddle), a rage-prone princess with trust issues, a washed-up alcoholic knight, and a goblin going through a motivational cult phase. Together, this chaotic band of misfits is Eldoria’s last hope. Probably. Maybe. Okay, not really—but the prophecy insists.

Planning a trip to Japan? Ditch the boring guidebooks and download the only Tokyo travel book that tells you what REALLY happens when you step into the neon chaos of Japan’s capital.

Meet Percy: a short-tempered emperor penguin with delusions of grandeur, a vocabulary that could peel paint off an iceberg, and a dream of ruling the South Pole—with violence, vengeance, and unapologetic sarcasm. After getting booted from his colony for flipper-based misconduct and general rage issues, Percy stumbles into the under-ice criminal underworld. What follows is a riotous rise through penguin slap-fights, seal mafia showdowns, and emotionally unstable puffins—with Percy building an empire of ice, fish, and fury.

Dive into the wild, sacred, and scandalous 2,000-year saga of the Catholic Church with The Keys of Heaven and the Sins of Earth by Dustin Gross—a brutally honest history that pulls no punches. From catacombs to cathedrals, this book uncovers the Church’s greatest hits and darkest misses: saintly heroes like Oscar Romero, power-hungry popes plotting like mob bosses, and earth-shaking controversies from the Crusades to modern abuse scandals.

Meet Barry. He’s a nicotine-addicted war veteran with Irritable Bird Syndrome and a grudge against influencer falcons. Once a legendary pigeon in the Bagel Wars of ’09, Barry Fin now spends his days chain-smoking on rooftops, pooping on Teslas, and screaming at TikTok sparrows. But when a smug perchfluencer named SkyDaddy69 starts gentrifying the skies of Brooklyn, Barry’s not about to take it sitting down (mostly because his gut won’t let him).

Ever feel like your flaws—cussing, temper, or all-out messiness—disqualify you from God’s love? Dustin Gross gets it. In this raw, hilarious Christian memoir, he shares his journey of wrestling with faith, failure, and the relentless grace that holds it all together. With wit and heart, Holy F-Bombs invites you into a faith that’s real, not polished. Through stories of shouting prayers and biblical hotheads like Peter, Gross reveals how God meets us in our chaos.

Barry’s got issues. Anger issues. Drinking issues. Authority issues. Oh—and his stinger has a name. It's Carl. And Carl wants blood. After being kicked out of Bee Therapy (again), Barry finds himself slapped with Hive Probation, forced to work with a butterfly “Calmness Coach” named Clover, and hunted by riot-gear-wearing Peace-Beetles. His crime? Buzzing too hard and giving zero pollen about authority.

In the festering muck of Boggy Ballsack Swamp, Frank—a short-legged, rage-fueled frog—croaks his way through a dark comedy fantasy that’s as hilarious as it is unhinged.