Showing results by author "Dustin Gross" in All Categories
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Holy Crocodiles!
- A Hilariously Dysfunctional Guide to Egyptian Mythology
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Tom Briggs
- Length: 3 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Ancient Egypt was a mess. The gods were dramatic, the afterlife was full of bureaucratic nightmares, and crocodiles were way too involved in politics. Packed with sarcastic commentary, ridiculous myths, and historically accurate nonsense, this book is perfect for history nerds, mythology fans, and anyone who loves their gods with a side of snark. Whether you're a mythology expert or just here for the chaos, Holy Crocodiles! is your ultimate crash course in divine dysfunction.
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Overall great insights
- By Kindle Customer on 02-01-2026
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Holy Crocodiles!
- A Hilariously Dysfunctional Guide to Egyptian Mythology
- Narrated by: Tom Briggs
- Length: 3 hrs and 19 mins
- Release date: 28-04-2025
- Language: English
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$16.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Holy Crap
- A Guide to World Religions
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: RK Meier
- Length: 3 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever wondered why gods are so obsessed with smiting people? Or why religious rules seem oddly fixated on what you can and can’t eat? Holy Crap: A Guide to World Religions takes you on a wildly entertaining ride through the world’s biggest faiths—roasting the absurdities, appreciating the wisdom, and answering life’s big questions (like whether Zeus would survive a paternity test). If you love history, mythology, and humor, this book is your next binge-listen.
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$16.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Muck & Majesty
- A Peasant’s Reckoning
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Shane Leketa
- Length: 2 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Mudwater is not a village of heroes. It’s a wretched stain on the map, a place where men toil, starve, and die beneath the weight of feudal cruelty. The taxman takes what little they have, the Baron bleeds them dry, and the gods—if they even exist—have long since turned their backs. Jacques the Lame knows this better than anyone. A crippled former soldier, he has spent his years rotting in the filth, hunting rats for copper and drinking away the memories of wars fought for lords who never knew his name.
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Muck & Majesty
- A Peasant’s Reckoning
- Narrated by: Shane Leketa
- Length: 2 hrs and 15 mins
- Release date: 07-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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How to Tokyo
- A Guide to Surviving, Thriving, and Not Getting Arrested in Japan
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Bradley Oconnor
- Length: 1 hr and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Planning a trip to Japan? Ditch the boring guidebooks and download the only Tokyo travel book that tells you what REALLY happens when you step into the neon chaos of Japan’s capital.
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How to Tokyo
- A Guide to Surviving, Thriving, and Not Getting Arrested in Japan
- Narrated by: Bradley Oconnor
- Length: 1 hr and 51 mins
- Release date: 14-07-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Whiskey & Shenanigans
- A Hilarious Guide to Drinking, Buying, and Not Making a Damn Fool of Yourself
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Chris Bentley
- Length: 1 hr and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether you’re a whiskey newbie, a seasoned drinker, or just someone who wants to sound smart while ordering a dram, Whiskey & Shenanigans is the ultimate guide to enjoying whiskey without the pretentious nonsense. Whiskey is for everyone—not just tweed-wearing snobs who "detect notes of old leather and regret." Whether you drink it neat, on the rocks, or in a cocktail, this book will help you appreciate whiskey, laugh a lot, and maybe even impress your friends.
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Whiskey & Shenanigans
- A Hilarious Guide to Drinking, Buying, and Not Making a Damn Fool of Yourself
- Narrated by: Chris Bentley
- Length: 1 hr and 40 mins
- Release date: 29-09-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Ruby Rose’s Road Trip of Destiny
- By: Dustin Gross, Traci Gross
- Narrated by: Amber D. Rankin
- Length: 2 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet Ruby Rose, a 2010 Kia Soul with a sassy attitude and a knack for storytelling. When Traci, a frazzled mom, and her glitter-obsessed daughter Lizzie embark on a cross-country journey from Oklahoma to California, Ruby’s not just their ride—she’s their guide through life’s wild detours. From squirrel heists to disco RVs, this funny road trip novel is packed with quirky characters, absurd mishaps, and heartfelt moments.
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Ruby Rose’s Road Trip of Destiny
- Narrated by: Amber D. Rankin
- Length: 2 hrs and 27 mins
- Release date: 26-09-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Holy Crap, They Cloned Jesus (Again)
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Kevin Meyer
- Length: 3 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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What if Jesus was cloned… and didn’t want to save the world? In the neon-drenched dystopia of 2144, spirituality is a subscription service, and megachurches sell miracles like fast food. Meet Jesus 3. 0, the latest cloned messiah, who’s more anxious human than divine savior. Teamed with Sadie Vox, a jaded ex-pastor, Gary, a foul-mouthed donkey prophet, and Bishop Synth, a sentient AI toaster, Jesus must navigate a world where faith is a brand and love is a liability.
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Holy Crap, They Cloned Jesus (Again)
- Narrated by: Kevin Meyer
- Length: 3 hrs and 43 mins
- Release date: 06-08-2025
- Language: English
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$16.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Axes & Asshats
- A Very Stupid Quest
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Alexander Gallacher
- Length: 3 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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In this wildly irreverent fantasy parody, four extremely unqualified adventurers are chosen to save the world—or at least not make it worse. Grogthar the Blood-Spiller: a shirtless barbarian with more biceps than brain cells. Tinsel: an elven rogue with sticky fingers and zero morals. Kevin: a depressed necromancer whose horse might be more competent than he is. Arlandio DuFlair: a bard with the libido of a god and the self-awareness of a rock.
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Axes & Asshats
- A Very Stupid Quest
- Narrated by: Alexander Gallacher
- Length: 3 hrs and 35 mins
- Release date: 27-05-2025
- Language: English
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The Ale-Stained Chronicles, Books 1, 2 and 3
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Nick Roughton
- Length: 3 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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In the chaos of post-plague France, a bastard noble, a disgraced knight, a cunning thief, and a blasphemous priest embark on a treacherous journey to reclaim a stolen birthright. Betrayal lurks in every shadow, and the Hundred Years’ War has made mercenaries cheap—but loyalty even cheaper. As assassins, warlords, and scheming nobles close in, survival demands wit, steel, and a willingness to gamble it all. In The Ale-Stained Chronicles, honor is a myth—only the ruthless endure.
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The Ale-Stained Chronicles, Books 1, 2 and 3
- Narrated by: Nick Roughton
- Length: 3 hrs and 43 mins
- Release date: 27-05-2025
- Language: English
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Flabsolutely Furious
- Chronicles of the Chunky Combat Club
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Zack Zimbler
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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They told him to shrink. He chose to suplex society instead. Ricky "Napalm" Stubbs just got fired for body-slamming a vending machine—and that was before the smart scale insulted his BMI in a British accent. Unemployed, overweight, and overwhelmingly pissed off, Ricky creates the Chunky Combat Club: a secret underground league for misfits who are thicc, ticked, and totally over it.
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Flabsolutely Furious
- Chronicles of the Chunky Combat Club
- Narrated by: Zack Zimbler
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Release date: 22-05-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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The Book of Tequila
- Glory, Regret, and Other Sacred Traditions
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: C W Jones
- Length: 2 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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The sacred. The sinful. The stupid. Tequila is all of it—and this is your lime-salted, smoke-soaked guide to surviving it. There are books about tequila—and then there’s this unholy gospel of agave-fueled madness. The Book of Tequila: Glory, Regret, and Other Sacred Traditions is your laugh-out-loud, profanity-laced, weirdly informative guide to the most dangerous spirit on Earth.
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The Book of Tequila
- Glory, Regret, and Other Sacred Traditions
- Narrated by: C W Jones
- Length: 2 hrs and 41 mins
- Release date: 20-05-2025
- Language: English
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How to Survive Life Without Totally Screwing It Up
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: "Coach Gary" Micheloni
- Length: 1 hr and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Adulting is a scam, and you’ve been tricked into playing. Bills, burnout, awkward family gatherings—nobody warned you it’d be this chaotic. How to Survive Life Without Totally Screwing It Up is the brutally honest, laugh-out-loud survival guide you didn’t know you needed. Packed with real talk, questionable advice, and the reassurance that nobody has it figured out, this book is your go-to for navigating life’s absurdity with (mostly) your sanity intact.
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How to Survive Life Without Totally Screwing It Up
- Narrated by: "Coach Gary" Micheloni
- Length: 1 hr and 14 mins
- Release date: 13-05-2025
- Language: English
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How to Put on Your Underwear and Other Life Hacks
- A Hilarious Guide to Mastering the Basics of Existence
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Dominik Marosi
- Length: 1 hr and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Struggling to function as a responsible adult? You’re not alone. How to Put On Your Underwear and Other Life Hacks is your brutally honest, laugh-out-loud guide to surviving everyday chaos—bad alarms, awkward small talk, and grocery store blackouts. Because let’s be real: adulting is a scam, and we’re all winging it.
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How to Put on Your Underwear and Other Life Hacks
- A Hilarious Guide to Mastering the Basics of Existence
- Narrated by: Dominik Marosi
- Length: 1 hr and 22 mins
- Release date: 12-05-2025
- Language: English
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Duck Off
- The Quack Chronicles
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Tavis Doucette
- Length: 2 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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They stole his bread. They mocked his speech. Now, he's taking it all back—one quack at a time. Meet Thaddaeus McQuack: a furious, foul-mouthed duck with a grudge the size of a city pond and a speech impediment that only makes his threats funnier. After a mime-related incident lands him in a zoo, Thaddaeus breaks free—and declares war on mankind. With a deranged cockatoo named Steve, a flying squirrel militia, and a revolution built on stale bread and pure rage, Duck Off: The Quack Chronicles is a wild, action-packed satire you never knew you needed.
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Duck Off
- The Quack Chronicles
- Narrated by: Tavis Doucette
- Length: 2 hrs and 4 mins
- Release date: 12-05-2025
- Language: English
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Watches for the Rest of Us
- How to Collect Without Going Broke
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Chris Reynolds
- Length: 1 hr and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Love watches but don’t have a trust fund? Think collecting great timepieces means spending thousands? Think again. Watches for the Rest of Us is the ultimate guide to building a killer watch collection—without breaking the bank. From $50 Casios to $500 Seikos, this book shows you how to find hidden gems, avoid scams, and buy the right watches for the right reasons—all while keeping your bank account intact.
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Watches for the Rest of Us
- How to Collect Without Going Broke
- Narrated by: Chris Reynolds
- Length: 1 hr and 47 mins
- Release date: 09-05-2025
- Language: English
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Holy WTF!
- A Hilariously Dysfunctional Guide to the Bible
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: RK Meier
- Length: 2 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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The Bible: History’s most dramatic, chaotic, and WTF-inducing book... now with 100% more sarcasm. Ever wondered why God created a talking snake, why Noah willingly signed up for the worst cruise in history, or why the Book of Revelation reads like a metal album fever dream? Welcome to HOLY WTF, the irreverent, side-splittingly funny deep dive into the weirdest, wildest, and most WTF moments in the Bible. With sharp wit, dark humor, and surprisingly insightful biblical analysis, HOLY WTF is perfect for skeptics, believers, history nerds, and anyone who thinks theology could use a little comedy.
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The Exorcist’s Guide to Dating
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Sasha Maestas
- Length: 2 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Damien is a washed-up exorcist who never believed in happy endings—until one of his cursed blog posts goes viral. Now he’s “The Loveorcist,” a foul-mouthed, whiskey-loving relationship guru for the haunted and heartbroken. Too bad his most persistent fan is a beautiful demon named Lilith…who might be falling for him.
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The Exorcist’s Guide to Dating
- Narrated by: Sasha Maestas
- Length: 2 hrs and 26 mins
- Release date: 05-05-2025
- Language: English
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How to Drink Rum
- A Guide to Success, Swagger, and Slightly Questionable Decisions
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Chris Reynolds
- Length: 1 hr and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Drink Like a Legend. Or at Least Like a Pirate. Rum is more than just a drink—it’s a lifestyle, a statement, and possibly the best bad decision you’ll ever make. Whether you’re a rum rookie or a seasoned sipper, this book delivers hard-earned wisdom, hilarious insights, and a guide to drinking rum like a legend.
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How to Drink Rum
- A Guide to Success, Swagger, and Slightly Questionable Decisions
- Narrated by: Chris Reynolds
- Length: 1 hr and 27 mins
- Release date: 05-05-2025
- Language: English
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The Drunken Fairy’s Guide to Absolute Chaos
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: Kevin Meyer
- Length: 3 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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A foul-mouthed fairy. A princess with an axe. A kingdom one bar fight away from collapse. Exiled from the Fairy Realm for “excessive profanity and reckless endangerment” (a total misunderstanding, really), Flit is stuck in the mortal world—where everyone is far too tall, not nearly drunk enough, and weirdly obsessed with quests. All he wants is a stiff drink and to be left alone. Instead, he gets kidnapped by a princess who thinks he’s her magical sidekick.
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The Drunken Fairy’s Guide to Absolute Chaos
- Narrated by: Kevin Meyer
- Length: 3 hrs and 5 mins
- Release date: 01-05-2025
- Language: English
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The Aromatic Buccaneer
- By: Dustin Gross
- Narrated by: David C Bender
- Length: 3 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Captain Rufus “Sweet Smellin’” McGraw is not your ordinary pirate. While most cutthroats plunder gold and rum, McGraw has a more refined obsession—the world’s rarest and most intoxicating scents. And he’ll rob, swindle, or seduce anyone to get them.
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The Aromatic Buccaneer
- Narrated by: David C Bender
- Length: 3 hrs and 15 mins
- Release date: 29-04-2025
- Language: English
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