Showing results for "two" in Dark Humour

Nico 'Junior' Trocci knows Lauren Marchetti is off limits. She is sweetness and laughter, whereas Junior exists in a world of violence and depravity. Men like him don't get to have women like her. It's why he pushed her away back in high school and has kept his distance ever since. But when Junior looks Lauren up online, he discovers the shy, bookish girl he remembers is gone. In her place is a strikingly beautiful woman whose social media is filled with scantily clad pictures of herself and a connection to a nearby play club.

Nightshift clerk and high-functioning insomniac Jack is back to work, trying his best to keep out of trouble. But when his chain-smoking coworker discovers a mysterious radio signal revealing the guarded secrets of their town, Jack will learn that an annoying new dayshift manager is far from the worst of his problems. In this second installment of the Gas Station saga, Jack finds himself entangled in his most harrowing adventure yet.

Garth Marenghi - Frighternerman, Darkscribe, Doomsage - is back with volume two of his TerrorTome . . . Horror novelist Nick Steen is abducted and imprisoned at Nulltec, a shadowy technological research facility with excellent conference parking, concealed deep on the Stalkford Downs. There he is observed, tested and 'interfered with' (physically) by a team of scientific experts led by Dr Barbara Nullman, determined to probe and 'nullify' his escaping imagination . . .

With the shadow of the Flayed Monarch looming ever closer, Dan must prepare the store and himself for the battle to come. To stand a chance, he’ll need to expand his operations, broker a precarious trade deal with the Delvers of Howlers Hold, and transform his stash of relics into an arsenal of magical war crimes.

Molly Gray wears her Head Maid badge proudly for every shift at the Regency Grand Hotel, plumping pillows, sweeping up the guests’ secrets, silently restoring rooms to a state of perfection. But when a renowned guest – a famous mystery writer – drops very dead in the grand tea room, Molly has an unusual clean-up on her hands. As rumours and suspicion swirl in the hotel corridors, it’s clear there’s grime lurking beneath the gilt. And Molly knows that she alone holds the key to the mystery.

All 10 episodes of the dark, surreal comedy featuring Matt Berry's twisted regression therapist. Unorthodox, unpredictable and verging on the unprofessional, Dr Berry is a deeply disturbing hypnotherapist. His experimental regressive technique is both strange and terrifying and involves taking unsuspecting clients on unsettling journeys through their subconscious.

More preoccupied with drinking, sleeping, and writing, an unnamed student neglects his studies and invents three separate openings for a novel. The first introduces the Pooka MacPhellimey, "a member of the devil class", the second involves Mr. John Furriskey, a character belonging to another of the student's creations (writer Dermot Trellis), while the final opening features legendary Irish heroes Finn Mac Cool and Mad King Sweeny. Soon, Trellis' creations rebel against him, doing as they like while he sleeps, and the characters begin wandering in and out of each other's tales.

Swords. Sorcery. Dick Jokes. Truly do the gods smile upon you, dear listener, for the first four books in the hilarious Caverns and Creatures series are now available in one audiobook set. Join Tim, Dave, Julian, and Cooper as they are thrown into a hostile fantasy world filled with magic and monsters, and ruled over by a cruel and sadistic game master who taunts and harasses them while he sits back and eats their fried chicken.

MCM Investigations are back! Although Brigit isn’t sure for how long. Money is tight, business is slow, and her partner, Paul, has been temporarily crippled due to her attempts to be in two places at once; one place being at the bottom of a ladder. It’s therefore manna from heaven when an old friend comes to them in need of help.

Rhiannon Lewis should be happy. Her cheating fiancé is in jail – framed for the depraved killing spree she committed. Her ex-lover is chopped up and buried where no-one will find him. But there’s one small problem. She’s pregnant. And as much as Rhiannon wants to continue working her way through her kill lists, a small voice inside is trying to make her stop. Now Rhiannon has to choose – motherhood or murder.

Gamer, geek, and vampire – Bill Ryder was a normal guy who's now trying to survive in a world of abnormal horrors. Despite awesome powers and a Brooklyn-sized attitude, the odds are stacked heavily against him. Bill must fulfill his destiny and save the world from the ancient terrors threatening it – all while trying to build some semblance of a social life.

Detective Roger LeCarre. Scourge of crime. Guardian of Exeter. Amateur squash player. And now, party guest at Powderham, the manor house owned by mysterious billionaire tech genius Eli Quartz. It is a small and unconventional gathering: the Bishop, a fading radio star, a desperate aristocrat, the ageing butler and his absurdly beautiful daughter—and Detective Roger LeCarre. Then a snowstorm blows in and the group realise they are trapped. And when, completely against expectations for this kind of situation, someone winds up dead, it's obvious who must solve the crime.

There have always been Mountain Men. Their names are legendary. Their motives unknown. Until now. Over four centuries, one by one, they changed the course of human history. Occasionally, some of them were even quite good at it. Like most things in life, successful revolutions take a bit of practise. Only they knew their identity and purpose, but someone has discovered their secrets. Now the actions of the Mountain Men are being re-enacted in the 21st century and there’s twelve billion dollars up for grabs for anyone willing to help.

Alex hates missing person’s cases. Unless they’re easy money. Anything is good when there’s easy money. Then there’s the delivery job. Get a box and hand deliver it to some rich jerk-off. Deal with another private investigator almost as skeezy as himself. And after all that there’s the Event. That’s sure to have a really, really, bad ending.

The legendary Lone Star Cafe, a little corner of Texas right in the heart of New York City. At one time or another, everyone from the Rolling Stones to Willie Nelson has jammed there. But this night, Thanksgiving eve, there's a different type of jam at the Lone Star. Larry Barkin, half of the headlining Barkin Brothers, is found dead in his dressing room, his head bashed in with his own guitar and a two dollar bill stuffed in his shirt pocket. It's Kinky they call for help, but the fast-talking, cigar-smoking country singer turned amateur detective has other plans.

The name’s Jett Turner and my writing about Acuña Cartel head Tito “El Tigre” Calderón has turned my day to day into a circus of the unbelievable. This past week has seen me painted by animal activists, forced to play houseguest to the DEA, have dead guinea pigs thrown at me, and witness a live retelling of Daniel in the Lion’s Den that went wrong for everybody but the lions. Toss in my being haunted by a call girl, pursued by a femme fatale with ulterior motives, a Witch Doctor of a housekeeper, Teddy Ruxpin porn, a popcorn serving hairless chimp, and you get an idea of what I’m up against.

Two weeks after waking up as a vampire, Sarah Wright is starting to feel comfortable in her fangs. She’s doing okay, if you don’t count wicked mood swings, crushing guilt, and a pervasive sense of existential dread. On the upside, her family is adjusting to the new normal of supernatural in stride, and she’s even testing the waters with a new guy.

Alvie Knightly may be waking up in the Ritz, but her life is no bed of roses. Firstly, she has the mother of all hangovers. Secondly, her beautiful, spoiled twin sister, Beth, has just been found dead in Sicily - and the police want Alvie for questioning. And thirdly, Alvie's hot new boyfriend has vanished with every penny of the millions they stole from Beth. But he picked the wrong girl to mess with.

Lachlan Kane, killer professionista, vorrebbe ritirarsi dagli "affari" e dimenticare il passato dedicandosi al suo negozio di pelletteria. Impresa tutt'altro che facile... fino a quando Lark Montague, cantante indie nonché migliore amica della ragazza di suo fratello, gli propone un accordo: lui darà la caccia a un assassino e lei gli garantirà la libertà. Perché il piano funzioni, però, dovranno sposarsi.

Following on the heels of Robert Brockway's comedic horror novel The Unnoticeables, The Empty Ones reveals the next chapter in the lives of a few misfits attempting to fight back against the mysterious Unnoticeables. The Empty Ones follows Carey and Randall to London where they go to rescue Gus and fight more of these mysterious angel-like creatures, and stumble on a powerful and unexpected ally.