Showing results for "The" in Humorous

Belissar has always lived a peaceful life, if not a particularly easy one. Though he lost his parents, he was taken in by a kindly villager who taught him his life's calling: beekeeping. But one day the local lord's ruthless son, Ruckanos, comes to their humble village to claim his own tower, slaughtering everyone. Luckily for Belissar, as he lies dying with an arrow in his back, a tiny worker bee decides to interfere, and he wakes up not only alive but a whole new bee-ing.

The usual result of a human taking a runaway semitruck head-on is a very sudden, very fast track to the pearly gates. But for one newly noncorporeal man, there's another option: become a dungeon. Feeling sorry for the desperate angel assigned to him, the man relents. Heck, if it doesn't work out, he can always chat with Saint Peter about it later. Next thing you know, he's a dungeon. Admittedly, a small run-down, somewhat unimpressive dungeon (more of a house, actually), but you gotta start somewhere, right?

Ever dreamt of waking up inside a novel? For Kim Roksu, this dream becomes reality when he finds himself in the shoes of Cale Henituse, the lazy, wine-loving son of a count--and punching bag for the novel's destined hero. Determined to dodge his grim fate, this new Cale Henituse vows to rewrite his story, aiming for a life of leisure far from heroic deeds and inevitable beatdowns.

I’m a pixie. If there was a level zero of supernaturals, I’d be on the sub-basement level. I’m not super-strong or fast or crazy-smart, and the little bit of pixie magic I do have is limited to the most basic things that any human street magician can do. So when a pack of coyote shifters and their Alpha start hunting me and threatening the only remaining family I have left, I realize I’m going to need some paranormal help to fight them off. I do the only sane thing I can think to do. I flee to Moonhaven Cove and beg help from the local PNW council and the town’s sheriff.

The second book in an action-packed, epic, and hilarious LitRPG fantasy series about an underdog who was never supposed to be a hero—but when he’s forced to manage a cursed magical farm, he proves himself far more resilient (and luckier) than any monster—or god—expected. Nicholas Parker...

She's unlike any one or any thing else: a Non-Standard Leashed-Intelligence Cybernetic Enforcer aka NSLICE-00P. The first of her kind, she's let loose into a universe of superheroes on behalf of her sinister masters to destroy all who oppose them. And everything's going according to plan—until NSLICE-00P gets hacked and sent into the past to kill her own creator before he creates her. Obeying orders as always, she wastes the poor guy. Unfortunately, there are consequences to initiating a reality-breaking time paradox. The most significant: total ejection from that reality.

Jerry hits the road, fighting for life and freedom. With conspiracies at play and a Primordial revived, gathering the Prisms is more crucial than ever. Jerry must travel to find them, but enemies abound. Growing stronger is imperative. Can he do it in time? From a sea of clouds to a vibrant archipelago, Jerry and his friends must contend with pirates, giants, ancient wizards, and the worst opponent of all: Boney’s bone puns.

All that stands between rowdy long-haul trucker Jill MacLeod (aka Junkmouth) and her family back in Boston is two thousand miles of asphalt. Well, that and the monstrous game the System has had her playing ever since it descended on Earth. The reward: mana. Jill's goal: kill, score, drive—and stay alive. Behind the wheel of a turreted forty-ton semi named Bertha, Jill hammers east from Montana through a gauntlet of every kind of chomping, hissing, rabid creature imaginable. Barreling forward in her magical soulbound big rig and chalking up a bumper crop of roadkill, Jill isn't alone for long.

When I answered an ad for a caretaker at Saint Mark’s Sanctuary, I thought I’d be dusting chandeliers and polishing floors. I didn’t expect to be tricked into a curse, going into debt to a monster, and being forced to take a self-paced “let’s learn magic” course so I can fix a 2,000-year-old problem. And that monster? Not your ordinary, everyday beast. He has hooves, and horns, and fur on his legs. But you know where he doesn’t have fur? Yeah. There. Which is fine. Except he doesn’t wear pants.

I'm the new owner of a magical mansion. This mansion, well, it's not your typical building. It's a dungeon from another world, masquerading as just another private residence in the suburbs. It has enchanted rooms, can craft powerful items, build lethal traps, and produce incredible monsters. And it's my mission to protect and evolve its monstrous inhabitants.

All life on Earth has been stolen away by The System. It was transported to another world at the behest of a distant galactic empire that lives in terror of humanity's potential. Ben - just a normal, if not slightly above average guy - had been about to go on the first real vacation of his adult life. But plans changed. Now, he must contend with danger and mystery in a world full of monsters, magic, and treasure. Armed with nothing but his wits and a special item given to him by The System, he embarks on a damn good adventure.

When Benjamin's latest conquest revealed herself to be from another world, he couldn't believe it. But her crazy revelations didn't stop there. She said that Benjamin was the reincarnation of the Forgotten Ruler, a supreme being with an empire that once spanned an entire continent. Now, he's traveling to that fantasy world with one goal in mind: rebuilding his empire, one monstrous offspring at a time. Move over Sauron, Benjamin Davies is the next dark lord of fantasy.

Caught up in a “Hero Summoning,” the hapless Mukohda was brought to another world from modern Japan, but he decided to make the most of it and enjoy a leisurely life of travel with his familiars, Fel and Sui. With new goddesses forcing blessings on him in exchange for offerings, and another familiar in the form of a peckish pixie dragon, Mukohda steadily amasses wealth and power.

A devil, a familiar, and magic gone wild—Tam’s life is more than a little complicated! Can he turn the chaos into triumph, or will it drag him someplace far darker? Having narrowly escaped capture by the Zinferan army, Tam, Eli, and Luca find themselves on the run. Their goal? Find a way home to Daxaria. Preferably alive! But as Tam carries on his family legacy, he continues to land himself in a whole cauldron of hot water!

They call him Kradak, but his friends call him Steve. He's big and strong, an actor who plays a hero named Kradak in a series of B-movies. When Rista and Grint come through the portal from Arkana, they don't understand what a movie is. They think Steve truly is Kradak the Champion. They kidnap him and take him back to Arkana to help them save their world. Once they discover the truth, it is too late. The portal is closed. Steve needs to become a hero. The fate of two worlds hangs in the balance.

Did I always believe in magic? Not until today. Sure, I had seen my mother's ghost, but I'd managed to rationalize that. It wasn't until I was taken to some strange museum in Oregon and inducted into a supernatural agency that I truly believed. Then, something happened to the agency, and I was one of the last mages left in America. Now, I have to learn my peculiar magic all by myself. Well, not entirely by myself. I have a few beautiful women and a disgraced mage genius to help me figure out why my powers are so unique.

Five friends, gamers for life, gather for their usual game night. Yet, when they use a strange new die they are transported to a fantasy world where all gaming ideas can come true. Together, the party must join forces to deal with the vile Necrolord whose plans will not only threaten this world, but Earth as well. Should be easy for a team of adventurers, but when gaming and real life meet, there are situations which cannot be anticipated.

One moment Robin is imbibing an elixir of his own creation as he practices casting spells, and the next he’s lying naked in a cave about to embark on a mysterious quest. It seems the God Rhyth has vanished from the realm of Mayaser, and Robin—altered from human to shadeling—has been chosen to find out what happened to the deity and its worshippers.

Power Day occurs every year on September 15th. Across the world, formerly regular people awaken with superhuman abilities—and labels to go with them. They become the next generation of Heroes...and Villains. September 15th is also Emily Wright’s first day on campus. While everyone else is out celebrating the start of their college career, Emily’s hiding in her dorm room. She wonders if it’s possible to earn a degree while completely avoiding eye contact with anyone. All she wants is to learn a little. Instead, she’s granted a superpower and categorized as villainous.

Absalom Scryne, the greatest wizard of his generation, has been murdered. There's no other explanation for why his consciousness now resides in his well-worn but perfectly pointed hat. Well, he isn't going to take that lying down . . . or hanging from a branch, as the case may be.