Ever wonder why staying calm when your child isn’t feels so hard? Co-regulation, the process of helping a child manage their emotions by managing our own, is one of the most powerful tools adults can use. But it’s also one of the hardest, because it requires our emotional skills to be strong first.

In this episode, I'll break down the three essential skills every adult needs to co-regulate effectively:

• Self-Regulation – Understanding and managing your own emotional state so you can be the calm in the storm.
• Empathy – Connecting to your child’s feelings without getting swept up in them.
• Communication that Builds Connection – Using language and presence that helps kids feel seen, heard, and safe.

You’ll learn the difference between empathy and emotional over-involvement, why “connection before correction” really works, and how small shifts in your own regulation can create big changes in your child’s behavior.

🎧 Tune in to learn how to co-regulate like a boss—with more awareness, compassion, and confidence.

Self-regulation is one of the most talked-about topics in child development today. But too often, it’s treated like a destination: a place we expect kids to arrive at with enough strategies, visuals, or practice. In reality, self-regulation is a lifelong journey that grows through relationships, experiences, and co-regulation with trusted adults.

In this episode, Deb Johnson, pediatric occupational therapist and founder of STEPS for Development, explores why expecting children to “stay in the Green Zone” or “use their strategies” misses the deeper picture of how regulation develops. You’ll learn how to shift your mindset from viewing self-regulation as something obtained through a curriculum, to accepting the ups and downs of regulation as we travel through life and our daily activities.

Whether you’re a parent, educator, or therapist, this episode will help you see self-regulation not as a skill to master, but as a developmental process we grow through together.

Most parents want to know: “What do I do when my child is in the middle of a meltdown?” The truth is, by the time your child reaches that stage, there’s not much you can do except keep everyone safe and let the big emotions run their course. But here’s the good news, you can learn to be proactive with your tools and bring lasting change by influencing behaviors instead of controlling them. Reduce and even eliminate meltdowns by teaching skills before the meltdown ever happens.

In this episode, Debra Johnson, pediatric occupational therapist and founder of STEPS for Development, shares why being proactive is the real key to helping kids build self-regulation. You’ll learn:

• Why children can’t reason or “snap out of it” during a meltdown
• How to step into detective mode and spot patterns behind big emotions
• Practical examples of proactive tools you can use before situations escalate
• Why empathy and perspective-taking are the foundation of skill-building
• How consistent, proactive teaching leads to fewer meltdowns over time

If you’ve been stuck in a cycle of reacting to your child’s behavior, this episode will show you a different path with proactive steps to support changing behaviors, not just stopping them.

Is your child “too sensitive,” or do they just have sensory quirks they’ll grow out of? Maybe you’ve heard that sensory diets can fix everything—or that sensory seeking is just ADHD in disguise. In this episode of the STEPS for Development podcast, pediatric occupational therapist Debra Johnson takes on six of the most common myths about sensory processing and sets the record straight.

You’ll learn:

• Why Sensory Processing Disorder isn’t a formal medical diagnosis—but sensory challenges are very real.
• The difference between a “sensory diet” and a true “sensory life.”
• Why kids don’t just outgrow sensory differences
• The wide spectrum of sensory responses—far beyond being “too sensitive.”
• The difference between ADHD and sensory seeking
• Why meltdowns aren’t about “bad behavior” but nervous system overload.

By the end, you’ll have a clearer understanding of what’s fact vs. fiction in the sensory world—and feel more confident in supporting your child with empathy and compassion for sensory processing differences.

Look closer, stay curious, and find out what’s really going on beneath the struggle. Let's dig deeper and find solutions that work!

Last week we talked about the power of focusing on just one challenge at a time—because narrowing your focus allows you to get make progress with specific challenges rather than being overwhelmed by the big issues. In this episode, we take the next step: digging deeper with task analysis. Rooted in Occupational Therapy practice, the process of task analysis helps us by breaking down a challenge into its core parts and uncovering hidden factors impacting participation. Then we can develop stronger hypotheses, and problem-solve more effectively. Using the STEPS for Development (SFD) model and the ESCAPE framework for task analysis, we’ll explore how looking beyond the surface helps you choose better strategies, adapt when things don’t work, and find solutions that actually stick.

Grab your FREE PDF Guide to the STEPS for Development Task Analysis process to help you focus your thoughts and problem solve for solutions that are more likely to be successful.

Parenting can feel impossible when it seems like everything is a problem—your child never listens, can’t sit still, melts down at homework, interrupts every conversation. These big, vague concerns can leave you feeling stuck and exhausted. In this episode, we’ll explore how to shift from overwhelmed to focused by narrowing those broad worries into specific, manageable challenges.

Once we have clear statements of a specific situation or task that your child is struggling with, we can then move forward with applying our knowledge and investigating the skills needed so that we choose the right strategies for success.

In this episode, we'll explore how to hone in on what matters most to you, while gaining clarity on a specific challenge to work on. You'll learn how to:

• Make a list of concerns, no matter how general
• Reframe vague statements into specific, solvable situations
• Prioritize and choose one concern to focus on first

Small steps really do lead to lasting change. This episode will help you let go of the pressure to fix everything at once and instead find momentum by tackling one challenge at a time.

Episode bonus: Grab this PDF worksheet to help you frame your thoughts and gain clarity on the one challenge you want to tackle first!

You've tried all the tools - sensory breaks, behavior charts, all the "parenting hacks" from social media - only to end up frustrated when nothing seems to work. It's not that you or your child are failing, it's that the strategy isn't the right match. Too often, we are looking for the quick fix and don't stop to think whether this tool in this moment is the right choice. Sometimes the tool we try even escalates behaviors and increases stress! In this episode we'll explore why even tried and true strategies might backfire, how to look beneath the surface of behavior to really know what your child needs, and what it takes to start "thinking like a therapist" so that you will be more effective and successful in supporting your child. You'll get a clearer lens for problem-solving, practical steps to start today, and the confidence to stop guessing and start knowing what works for your child.

Is your child’s “defiance” leaving you drained and second-guessing yourself? Are you feeling manipulated, controlled and lost about how to change the status quo? What if those daily battles were really signs of persistence, resilience, independence and creativity that are your child's strengths, just waiting to be guided? In this episode, we’ll reframe defiance and oppositional behaviors through a new lens—seeing the strengths behind strong-willed behavior and learning practical strategies to reduce power struggles, foster cooperation, and nurture independence. I'll guide you in shifting your perspective and seeing how a strength-based approach changes everything and, most importantly, empowers you with the skills you need to tackle those challenging moments. Together, we’ll discover how strong will, when supported, can become one of your child’s greatest assets.

BONUS with this episode! Grab your copy of the Strength-Based Guide to Strong-Willed Kids here.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

You Can't Make Me But I Can Be Persuaded by Cythina Tobias

How To Talk So Kids Will Listen, and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Faber and Mazlish

Celebrate Calm Podcast with Kirk Martin