Life happens in the small moments when we are truly present. 

So often we search for happiness and joy outside of ourselves and we get stuck in the 'I will be happy when' mentality. This never leads to happiness because we have placed it at a fictional point in the future which never arrives, because as soon as we reach it the goal post moves and we find ourselves right back where we started; trying to reach it, believing we will feel it when we get there. Usually when we own this item or have achieved that goal. 

Yet peace, joy, contentment and a sense of meaning in our lives is actually available to us in any given moment. We just have to be truly present in each moment with the recognition that the only moment is now, that everything else is simply a perception and not real.
Today we discuss how developing a greater awareness and presence in our lives is the key to true, sustainable happiness.

We talk about the differences between awareness and self-awareness, and a range of practices that we can implement in our lives to help us cultivate greater awareness and remain in this state.

"I have come to discover that it is the simple, small and precious moments of our lives, that if we are not fully present for, could appear seemingly insignificant, even go unnoticed! Yet they are an opportunity to experience the true joy of what it is to be human and hold the key to our greatest fulfilment and joy” Kezra

"I realised not that long ago, less than three years ago, that the vast majority of my life was spent in an unconscious default, that I spent the majority of my time either in the past or in the future, that I was practically never present. I was attaching my sense of achievement, future happiness and contentment to events that were in the future and still to come" Ian


SHOW NOTES

Forest Bathing
 
Books
Broken Open by Elizabeth Lesser
When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chödrön

The personal growth, spiritually and self-empowerment space is a double edged sword. On one hand it can be deeply empowering, transformative and healing, and on the other it can have quite the opposite effect and instead be disempowering, toxic and a way of running from or hiding rather than doing 'the work'. 

It can also become a means of numbing or distracting from our true feelings, or a way to bypass things that we are afraid of and don’t want to face.  If we are staying busy wether thats with work or 'workbooks' we can often (not always) bypass sitting with our feelings, which is actually where true healing and empowerment lies on our authentic journey.

The balance to a healthy relationship with spirituality and self empowerment, starts with our relationship to ourselves and how we approach our journey with awareness and intention. Ensuring we follow our hearts and trust our intuition instead of giving our power away to others or seeking fulfilment outside of ourselves.

In this episode I talk about my personal experience with spirituality and self empowerment and the toxic relationship I developed. I talk about how we can foster a deeper awareness of our relationship to 'doing the work" and how we can keep it truly empowering without falling into unhealthy practices.   Our personal journey is truly unique,  I discuss what questions we can ask ourselves in order to stay aware and stay true to our own authenticity on our self empowerment journey.
 
"Sometimes self empowerment and spirituality can take an unhealthy turn. We can get  so caught up in needing to improve ourselves, fix or mend ourselves, that we start to feel broken, less than, that something is wrong with us or we are unworthy of love; our dream career or our desires until we good enough, worthy enough, healed enough. We can find ourselves feeling exhausted, wrung out and overwhelmed from all the deep shadow work we have been doing, and filled with a longing for rest, lightness and play".  Kezra

SHOW NOTES:

Gabrielle Bernstein
https://gabbybernstein.com/

Marianne Williamson
https://marianne.com/

Abraham Hicks
https://www.abraham-hicks.com/

In this episode we discuss the tricky subject of how to deal with disagreements. Whilst we do spend a little time on disagreements of fact (like what actually happened or what is "true"), the bulk of this episode focuses on what to do about a collision of values - in other words when you need to make a decision within a relationship, but disagree at a fundamental level about what the right thing to do is. For example, whether to send children to private or public school, whether to have savings or accrue debt on credit cards to buy what you want or whether eating meat is acceptable or unethical. We provide clarity on how to prepare for resolution of these clashes without getting into an argument or, worse still, a fight. We talk about compromise and how to strengthen the relationship in the process of coming to a decision that both people can live with and that meets both peoples needs. 


"Having an open conscious conversation with your partner about problems within your relationship is key, yes these conversations are hard, they are vulnerable and can be deeply triggering, but over time if these things aren't talked about they will lead to resentment and tension within the relationship and a break down in communication with both parties needs not being met".   Kezra

"Both Kezra and I firmly believe that a good approach to disagreement means that both sides win; we are both on the same side of the net in a game of tennis against life, we both want each other to win".  Ian

Here on our website you can find a variety of articles and resources for wellness and self-empowerment.

Website: https://www.conversationsworthhaving.co.uk/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-qqezYoZMeYQUpE6OVMgiA

Twitter: https://twitter.com/HavingWorth

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/conversationsworthhaving/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConversationsWorthHaving.co.uk

Email: info@conversationsworthhaving.co.uk 

SHOW NOTES:

Welcome to the second part in our How To Have Better Conversations series. In this episode we discuss communication within romantic partnerships,  emphasising those discussions aimed at dealing with issues or challenges within the relationship. The aim is always for a better understanding and improved relationship to emerge from the conversation. We emphasise the need for a deliberate and intentional approach through which both parties come out of the conversation better than when they went in and the relationship thrives. We believe a clear understanding of what you are trying to achieve and how to achieve it, is key to couples improving their partnerships and feeling more connected and fulfilled,  their compassionate guidance is what makes this podcast so valuable for couples.

"Those places that are hard to go to actually result in more fulfilling, connected and more pleasurable relationships". Kezra

"You want to come out of the conversation better than when you went in both as an individual and as a couple". Ian

Here on our website you can find a variety of articles and resources for wellness and self-empowerment.

Website: https://www.conversationsworthhaving.co.uk/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-qqezYoZMeYQUpE6OVMgiA

Twitter: https://twitter.com/HavingWorth

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/conversationsworthhaving/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConversationsWorthHaving.co.uk

Email: info@conversationsworthhaving.co.uk 

 
SHOW NOTES

The Appreciation Game/Exercise

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMl80WrrD9k

Dr Rangan Chatterjee

https://drchatterjee.com/


Exercises to do with your partner for deeper connection

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGhaf8C3IfU

In the United Kingdom there appears to be a roadmap towards the end of lockdown and the world is looking at the end of the pandemic.

In this episode we talk about our personal experience of the different lockdowns in the UK, Portugal and Italy over the course of the last year, with particular emphasis on what they have learned of value to take into life after lockdown.

We explore what we have learned about ourselves, what helped us cope, the difference between lockdown one and two and what's working for us now.

Finally, we discuss our hopes for the new normal, what we are going to leave behind in the old normal, and leave you with some top tips for getting through the rest of lockdown and how to enter post pandemic life in the best possible mindset.

"Self acceptance - be patient and compassionate with yourself, I have experienced so much self-judgement about struggling,  about not being ok. Finding love and compassion for ourselves is so important, it's ok to not be ok. love yourself on your worst days as you can on your best days". Kezra

"I learnt a lot during lockdown , forgiving myself, learning to love myself, to treat myself better and not be as critical of myself as I used to be, the first lockdown was a massively transformative period for me". Ian

Here on our website you can find a variety of articles and resources for wellness and self-empowerment.

Website: https://www.conversationsworthhaving.co.uk/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-qqezYoZMeYQUpE6OVMgiA

Twitter: https://twitter.com/HavingWorth

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/conversationsworthhaving/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConversationsWorthHaving.co.uk

Email: info@conversationsworthhaving.co.uk 

SHOW NOTES:

Book - The Courage To Be Disliked by Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/43306206-the-courage-to-be-disliked

Dr Mark Hyman Podcast
https://www.youtube.com/user/ultrawellness

Peter Crone
https://www.petercrone.com/

Dr Rangan Chatterjee
https://drchatterjee.com/

Joe Wicks
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAxW1XT0iEJo0TYlRfn6rYQ/videos

The National (band)
https://americanmary.com/

In this first episode in our conversation series, we talk about how we create more fulfilling and connected relationships by having better conversations. We give guidance on the attributes of a good conversation, how to prepare, how to be present throughout and make space for everyone involved to have their say and feel satisfied that an understanding has been reached. Amongst other things, we discuss how to listen properly, how to deal with interruptions, how to make sure the more quiet amongst us get to participate and how to disagree compassionately. We all benefit from good conversations and this is how to have them.

"If we have taken the time to prepare and ground ourselves before the conversation ,we are able to be truly present and our mind isn't going to wander off and make up stories that are clouded with our own perception or fears". Kezra

"You need to recognise the courage it took for the other person to bring this to the conversation and honour that with your presence and engagement". Ian
 

Here on our website you can find a variety of articles and resources for wellness and self-empowerment.

Website: https://www.conversationsworthhaving.co.uk/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-qqezYoZMeYQUpE6OVMgiA

Twitter: https://twitter.com/HavingWorth

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/conversationsworthhaving/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConversationsWorthHaving.co.uk

Email: info@conversationsworthhaving.co.uk


SHOW NOTES:

Esther Perel - Relationship Expert and Psychotherapist

https://www.estherperel.com/

Dr Rangan Chatterjee

https://drchatterjee.com/

Non Violent Communication

https://www.cnvc.org/learn-nvc/what-is-nvc