Are you willing to allow people not to like you because you're so committed to being yourself? This episode is for all the people-pleasers who are exhausted from trying to be everyone's favorite. Andy gives you permission to let people not like you and shows you why this is the key to actually liking yourself more.

What You'll Learn:

• Why giving people permission to dislike you is liberating
• The real reason you're desperate to be liked (it's about how you think you'll feel)
• How to stop being "creepy, needy, and graspy" when someone pulls away
• Why some people won't like your "flavor" and why that's normal
• How to model authentic confidence for your kids (especially teenagers)

Key Takeaways:

• "They can't like you enough to make up for you not liking yourself."
• "Having the courage to be disliked is empowering and makes you more confident."
• "If someone doesn't like you, maybe you're just not their flavor, and that's okay."

Perfect For:

• Parents who want their teenagers to like them
• Exhausted people-pleasers ready to break the cycle
• Anyone who's changed themselves to fit in
• Parents wanting to model authentic confidence

The Bottom Line: Being likable is overrated. Liking other people (and yourself) that's where the real magic happens.

"Give people permission to not like you. They already have permission anyway, but you giving it feels so much better."

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

It's 8:30 AM, a jackhammer is going FULL THROTTLE outside my window for the third hour straight, and I'm over here typing about unconditional love.

But that obnoxious jackhammer just gave my entire family the perfect real-time lesson in how our thoughts create our reality. One daughter felt annoyed, my husband felt compassion (because he knows someone who got nerve damage from jackhammer work), and others were pretty neutral about the whole thing.

Same situation. Totally different emotional experiences.

This is unconditional love in action, people.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

The Michelle Moment: Years ago, my friend Michelle asked the question that changed everything: "So when you say unconditional love, you mean love WITHOUT conditions, right?" (Thank you, Michelle, for getting clarity on that life-changing concept!)

The Cinnamon Roll Effect: You know how my mom's homemade cinnamon rolls would make everyone congregate in the kitchen? That's the kind of magnetic energy we want to put out as parents - unconditional love so strong our kids can practically smell it.

Why We Sabotage Our Own Happiness: We actually choose NOT to feel love sometimes. Wild, right? We decide our kids "don't deserve" our love when they're acting up. But plot twist - you're the only one who experiences your emotions. When you withhold love, you're literally punishing yourself.

The Gym Analogy That'll Blow Your Mind: My daughter's friend Grace has been crushing it at the gym for a year. People literally stop her to comment on her transformation. Meanwhile, my body reflects "a mom of six who likes chocolate." Both are totally valid! But it shows we all have untapped capacity - including for unconditional love.

The Behavioralism Trap: We've been taught that love is a reward and anger is a consequence. But real change happens from the inside out, and the only way to help your child's heart soften is to create an environment where their nervous system feels safe.

The Truth Bomb Section:

• Your child's behavior cannot make you stay frustrated (even though it feels like it can)
• Love is available to you 24/7, regardless of what anyone else is doing
• You can love someone deeply and still set firm boundaries
• The emotion of love benefits YOU first - it's basically the ultimate gift you give yourself

My Challenge For You:

Pick someone in your life who's challenging to love right now. Write down all the conditions you're putting on loving them. Then ask yourself: "What would it feel like to love them no matter what, all the time?"

Try it with yourself. What would unconditional love toward yourself look like?

The Random Love Experiment:

Next time you're out and about, try what I call "random love" (yes, I need a better name for this). Look at strangers and think "I love you" in your head. It sounds weird, feels amazing, and sends more love out into the world. What's not to love about that?

"How we treat ourselves in private is how we will treat others in public."

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

What if I told you that acceptance - the thing you think means "giving up" - actually requires MORE effort than fighting? And what if this one shift could stop your parenting triggers in their tracks?

Hey parents! I'm giving myself high fives over here because this episode is going to blow your mind about what acceptance actually means in connected parenting. If you've been in League with me, you're probably rolling your eyes because I say "accept, accept, accept" ALL the time. But today I'm doing a different spin on acceptance that will challenge everything you think you know.

What You'll Learn:

• Why acceptance is the hardest (and most powerful) parenting tool
• The 3-step process to accept triggering moments "as if you chose them"
• How to stop your nervous system from hijacking your parenting responses
• The counter-intuitive reason fighting your kids' behavior makes it worse

The Acceptance Challenge That Will Change Your Parenting

"Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it." - Eckhart Tolle

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

I’m standing in my kitchen, staring at the mess, kids bickering in the background, and my brain is screaming, “We’re going down!”

You know those moments when you’re about to lose it, when correction mode feels inevitable, and you just want to eject out of the whole parenting gig for five minutes? Yeah, I’ve been there. More times than I can count.

And here’s the wild thing: those are the exact moments when I’ve learned to practice something that used to feel impossible for me, feeling proud of myself.

Not arrogant. Not fake. Not “my kids are perfect angels and I’m crushing it.” I mean the quiet kind of proud, the kind that whispers, “Hey, you stayed calm. You showed up. You tried.”

This episode is the second half of a two-part series. In Episode #176 we talked about regret (ouch). Today we’re swinging to the other end of the spectrum: pride. The good kind. The kind we want to model for our kids so they don’t grow up thinking they have to earn love or validation by being flawless.

Here’s what you’ll hear inside:

• Why pride has been so hard for me (confession: I used to literally gag when my husband read me kind emails from clients).
• How parents in my programs are learning to celebrate themselves in the middle of laundry piles, meltdowns, and messy houses.
• Why feeling proud is not optional fluff — it’s actually a superpower that calms your nervous system and fuels growth.
• A question you can ask yourself today that will help you create the emotion of pride on purpose.

Parenting is full of emergency landings. You’re going to have turbulence, and you’re going to have moments when you’re convinced you’ve lost the plot. But if you can walk away from those moments and still say, “I’m proud of myself for how I showed up” that changes everything.

So let’s talk about how to land the plane safely, even when you feel like you’re about to lose it.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

I woke up this morning to the most incredible thunderstorm (which got me up way too early, thanks Mother Nature), and instead of being grumpy about it, I had this wild thought: "What if I just recorded that podcast episode I've been marinating on?"

Today we're diving into a concept that literally changed my life which is...

--> It doesn't get any better than this <--

I know, I know. Your brain is probably doing that thing where it's like "EXCUSE ME, ANDEE HAVE YOU SEEN MY LAUNDRY PILE?" But stick with me here, because this isn't some toxic positivity nonsense.

The backstory (because I love a good origin story):

Remember when my go-to thought was "This is happening and it's okay"? I used to literally add "it's okay" to the end of every resistant thought like some kind of nervous system fairy godmother. Kids are fighting... it's okay. Lost my cool again... it's okay.

It was like training wheels for my brain, and honestly? It worked.

But then this new thought showed up five years ago and absolutely WRECKED me (in the best way): It doesn't get better than this.

I don't want you to settle or give up on your dreams of organized closets and children who actually put their dishes in the dishwasher. NOT AT ALL! I want you to hold on to those dreams and lean into this, because it's gonna change your life.

Your capacity for happiness has absolutely nothing to do with external circumstances!!

That joy you're waiting for, when the house is clean, when bedtime is smooth, when you finally stop losing your cool. It's available RIGHT NOW!!!

I spent years thinking tomorrow would be better than today. That when my kids were "better behaved" or when I was a "better parent," THEN I could be happy. But here's what I discovered: I was basically trading my happiness today for some mythical future moment that... spoiler alert... never actually arrives the way we think it will.

I went full nerd on this concept and found it EVERYWHERE—the Bible, Buddhist teachings, 12-step programs, that anonymous Rabbi I'd never heard of. When the same wisdom shows up across totally unrelated sources? That's when you know you're onto something big.

What this actually looks like in real life:

• That moment when you're stuck in traffic for TWO HOURS (true story from last month) and you realize you can choose to make THIS moment beautiful
• When your toddler has a two-hour meltdown about not getting a cookie and you discover peace isn't dependent on their emotional regulation
• When you're hiding in your pantry eating goldfish crackers and you realize happiness doesn't require anything to change

The most present, happy people are actually the most productive people. When you're not desperately trying to escape this moment, magic happens.

Next time your brain tells you "it'll be better when..." catch it. Ask yourself: "What thought could I have right now that would let me tap into joy in THIS moment?"

This moment, with all its beautiful messiness, is as good as it gets. And that's not bad news. That's the most liberating news ever.

If this episode helped you see your "right now" differently, would you mind leaving a review? It helps other overwhelmed parents find these conversations, and honestly, that's my whole mission here. ❤️

Stay connected, stay curious, and remember, you're already enough.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

Picture this: You've just had the most beautiful vision for your afternoon. Snacks are prepped, your nervous system is regulated, and you're ready to welcome your kids home with the kind of calm connection that makes parenting books weep with joy. Then reality shows up. Your 5-year-old melts down about the "wrong" crackers, your teenager rolls their eyes so hard they practically fall out, and suddenly you're yelling about homework like you're auditioning for a reality show you never wanted to be on.

Welcome to what I like to call "productive failure" and it's about to become your new best friend.

What We're Diving Into Today:

• The Dictionary Definition That Will Blow Your Mind – Turns out failure is way more neutral than we thought (spoiler: it's just "omission of expected action" – how boring is that?!)
• Why We're Actually Avoiding the Wrong Thing – Plot twist: We're not afraid of failure itself, we're afraid of our thoughts ABOUT failure
• The Baby Walking Wisdom – Those adorable falls aren't obstacles, they're literally building the muscles needed to walk (mind = blown)
• Productive vs. Unproductive Failure – There's a difference between failing while putting yourself out there and failing by hiding in your comfort zone
• The Confidence Connection – Real confidence isn't about never failing, it's about getting really good at failing forward

What if your biggest parenting "disasters" are actually your success strategy in disguise? What if every time you lose your cool, forget to stay connected, or watch your beautiful bedtime routine implode, you're actually collecting the exact data you need to become the parent you want to be?

Your Mission (Should You Choose to Accept It): Instead of avoiding failure, start collecting it like you're going for some kind of awesome parenting award. Every time something doesn't go according to plan, ask yourself: "What's the wisdom here? What's this teaching me about myself, my triggers, my capacity?"

Your kids don't need you to be perfect. They need you to be human, to model resilience, and to show them that falling down and getting back up is literally how we grow.

If this episode helped you see failure in a new light, would you mind leaving a review? It helps other parents find these conversations, and honestly, it makes my day when I get to read how this stuff is landing for you.

Now go connect with your kids, and don't forget to connect with yourself too.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

I'm three days away from a family vacation, and my house looks like it got into a fight with a tornado... and lost. There are Amazon boxes everywhere (because apparently we ALL forgot "essential" items), laundry covering every surface, and yesterday? Our dog got skunked. Because OF COURSE.

But here's the kicker, my kids are walking around like it's totally normal. My youngest's friend came over, I apologized for the mess, and she goes, "Oh, this reminds me of my bedroom!" I nearly died inside.

You know that moment when your brain tries to convince you that EVERYONE ELSE is responsible for your feelings? Yeah, we're diving deep into that today.

The difference between blame and responsibility:

• Blame = "This house is making me crazy!" (Translation: I'm powerless and someone else needs to fix this)
• Responsibility = "I'm making me crazy about this house" (Translation: I have the power to change this)

After I finally made peace with the chaos and stopped trying to recruit my family into my stress spiral, I woke up the next morning and someone had mysteriously cleaned the entire house. Magic? Maybe. More likely proof that when we stop being the energy vampire in the room, good things happen.

"The reason I'm feeling upset right now is because of a thought I'm thinking."

Mind. Blown. Right?

When your kid has a meltdown about 10-minute chores, they're not being dramatic (okay, maybe a little). Their brain genuinely thinks this is the end of the world. Same energy as me wanting to flee the country because there are dishes in the sink.

Random Insights:

• Emotions are self-generated (even when it feels like your teenager is personally attacking your soul)
• Nobody can actually "make" you feel anything (rude but true)
• Sometimes the best parenting happens when you stop trying so hard
• Houses clean themselves when you finally chill out (science!)

Stay human and stay curious!

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

Ever find yourself lying in bed at night, replaying every parenting moment that went sideways that day? Yeah, me too. For years, I would literally drown in a sea of regret, beating myself up for every time I lost my cool, lectured instead of listened, or just plain missed the mark with my kids.

But here's what I've learned: regret can either be your biggest parenting enemy or your secret weapon. The difference? How you use it.

What We're Diving Into Today

🌟 The two faces of regret: when it serves you vs. when it sabotages you
🌟 Why your brain is addicted to the regret spiral (and how to break free)
🌟 The future-focused regret hack that actually motivates positive change
🌟 How to model healthy regret processing for your kids
🌟 The Nelson Mandela approach to learning and growing from every "mistake"

The Golden Quote That Changed Everything

"Just 'cause we know how to do something better doesn't mean we're capable in that moment to do better."

This isn't about letting ourselves off the hook - it's about radical acceptance of our humanity while still growing into the parents we want to be.

My Personal Moment

Picture this: I'm driving home, hit some rocks, dent my wheel, and my brain immediately goes into full regret mode. But my husband calls me out (lovebug that he is), and I literally had to go swing in a hammock for 10 minutes to metabolize the regret instead of drowning in it. Sometimes the work shows up in the most unexpected places!

Your Takeaway Action

The Future Regret Exercise: Imagine yourself 10 years from now. What would you regret NOT doing with your kids today? Use that awareness to guide your choices right now, not to beat yourself up about the past.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista