Bill of the Dead

At the edge of chaos, one geek stands tall. Five years ago, dateless dork Bill Ryder somehow saved the world, banishing magic and monsters to the shadows. He thought it was over, that he was finished with that life. Too bad for him, shit’s about to get surreal again. Now the impossible has happened. His goddaughter is conjuring fireballs from thin air and two vampires have shown up at his doorstep looking to kick his ass.

Bill Ryder is having a hell of a week. Magic is back, one of his friends has been entombed in solid rock, and he once again has no pulse to speak of. Too bad it’s about to get worse. Something is hunting vampires in New York City. A smarmy wizard has been called in to investigate, one with skeletons in his closet and eyes for Bill’s girlfriend. All the while, neolithic horrors - not seen since the dawn of time - are reappearing, wreaking havoc wherever they step.

Ed Vesser feels trapped by his life - literally. He’s being held prisoner by a would-be world conqueror. All he wants is to escape back to his fiancé, assuming she doesn’t dump his ass when she finds out he’s a vampire. Serena Taylor’s a witch with a knack for technomancy - using her magic to help deliver unreal profit margins. Too bad she’ll need to put in some overtime thanks to long-lost dryads and undead goons breathing down her neck.

Bill Ryder’s past and present are about to collide. His girlfriend’s been marked for death by the immortal temptress who wants him. One’s a witch and the other’s a vampire, which means the chances of them talking out their problems over tea are slim to none. It’s bad enough Bill’s too distracted by evil leprechauns and redneck werewolves to put a stop to it, but now something massive has been spotted prowling the waters of the Hudson - a harbinger of biblical proportions, forewarning of dark times to come.

Gamer, geek, and legendary vampire Bill Ryder isn’t having a great day. His girlfriend is lost in another dimension, his apartment’s been staked out by werewolves, and to top it all off, he’s flat broke. Too bad there’s no rest for the wicked. Monstrous beasts of biblical proportions have been unleashed upon the world, leaving Bill with a mighty big question—how the hell is one poor-ass vamp supposed to stop something the size of a battleship? All’s not lost, though.