Showing results by author "J.R. Gray" in All Categories

We became famous overnight. One day, I was a twenty-four-year-old drummer slinging pizzas to make ends meet, and the next, I was a member of the most popular alternative band ever. Despite being world-famous, there was no connection in it. I'd lost touch with reality, with intimacy. I couldn't find a place to be normal. I'd lived my entire life straight-edged while watching obsession destroy my best friend. Obsession terrified me—that is until I met him.

I never thought I'd go to college a virgin, but unless something changes—and fast—that's what's going to happen. In comes Harden Hart, my all-American boy-next-door best friend with an offer to help in a way I'd never imagined. The boy, who turned everything he touched to gold, had a filthy side to him I'd never seen. Oh, and did I mention he's straight?

Finding out the guy I hooked up with is on my team isn't the way I saw my first week of coaching going. My name is Anthony Hawke, and I used to be a rising star in the NHL until someone purposefully tore my ACL, ending my career. I went from the top of my life to nothing in a matter of months. I take a coaching job a thousand miles away as a fresh start, only to ruin it before I start. Three months ago, I met him in a bar. Sexy and funny and built like a God—no names, just the best night of my life.

I'll do anything not to marry the girl my parents want me to. Including marrying her brother in a drunken panic. I'm not gay, but I can fake it long enough to get our parents off my back, right? Cue hiding out for the next two years, but nothing is that simple, because I'm offered a spot on the US National team. Now we have to fake it for the entire world as the poster boys of gay fencers while Colin makes me doubt everything I think I am. I'm not prepared for all the ways I depend on Colin. Or the place he's filling in my life.

I've been kept away from my destiny as long as I've been alive. I'm the bastard, banished from Manhattan, and forbidden from my dream of playing college hockey for the Gods because no one can find out about me. But now Dad's dead, and guess who's in the will? So my dream of playing for the Gods can finally come true, but I have to find my place in my half-brother's shadow while dealing with my rival Teddy, who's been a thorn in my side since juniors. He's cocky, infuriating, and the biggest himbo I've ever met.

Selling my virginity wasn't how I saw my first week of college going. But after my parents cut me off, an offer from a gorgeous rich stranger doesn't sound so bad. It's only twenty-four hours and I'll never have to see him again. Wrong. Much to my horror, the stranger is Oliver Godfrey, the captain of my fencing team. As if that isn't bad enough, his parents own half the city. There is no escape from him or the way he makes me feel.

I might be the best-selling solo artist in the world, but my personal life is a disaster. For every number one album, there's a sea of my worsts, all documented in photos. Bad break-ups. Destroyed hotel rooms. Fights. Drugs. And just as many rumors. Every headline reaffirms the walls I've built around myself. Fame destroys everything it touches, and I can't let anyone close. The only exception is my best friend—Lowe Wilder

At seventeen, I ran. I joined the military and planned to never step foot in my home town again. Nothing could make me return to that hellhole and the pain I buried there, or so I thought—until I found myself on a plane to that very place. Almost two decades later, I’m forced home to help find a missing nine-year-old. As a member of the most elite K9 special unit in the country, it was my job, and you can’t exactly say no to the FBI. It should be easy, and I won’t have to face what I ran from. However, the case is anything but simple.

Quellcrist King has been playing a part his entire life. The more famous he becomes, the more he hides. The only person he ever let see the real him rose with him from nothing to the very top. They were the king and queen of Hollywood - and then she wanted a divorce. The only way to survive his depression is to bury himself in work. If he can be a character, maybe he won't have to remember himself. A gay role can't be any different than playing a straight one, can it? 

My father’s the president and my brother’s the golden boy, which leaves me the black sheep; the son who never wanted to be here at all. The white house is my gilded cage, and the secret service are my prison guards. I'm nearly twenty and nothing about my life is normal. The only thing giving me life and any motivation to get out of bed is the way he looks at me. The stolen glances across the West Wing. Heated gazes in the private dining room. He's my father's best friend, which isn't even the worst part, he's also the vice president.

My soul mate is my natural enemy. Or close enough. He's a vampire and I'm a wolf. Our kinds are at war. A centuries-old blood war. I can't stay away from him. I hate him, but I want him. Our love is a standoff. For every inch I take, he pushes a mile.

I fell for him in the heat of the summer. I fell for the stars in his eyes. The way he said my name. I'll never love anyone the same. But our story ended when it was just beginning. Fame gave me more than I could ever imagine, but I'll forever suffer the cost. The summer of love and loss would forever be a stain on my heart.

First day of college, everyone is settling into their rooms, and in walks Jeff Woods—the blond bastard. He’s arrogant, smart and an elite swimmer. Worst of all, everyone loves him. Only, he’s also insufferable, flirty, and a sex god. He pushes every button I never knew I had—all with an air of indifference—like he doesn’t know the effect it has on me. Did I mention he’s the hottest guy I’ve ever laid eyes on?

A guy in a skirt wouldn't turn a straight guy on, right? I spent the last decade performing next to him. I've never looked at him as more—until I walked in on him in a skirt. He's as broken as I am. We survived our childhood together. And when he's finally trying to embrace the parts his father tried to beat out of him, I can't handle it. He's taunting me with smeared eyeliner and a filthy smile, singing to a sold-out crowd, and it's getting too hot under these stage lights. I can't look him in the eyes. I can't be with him—not like that—but I can't stop thinking about him.

The pretty boy. The loner. Old Hollywood. I had all kinds of names as the least-known member of the most famous band in the world. Behind all the hype and masks, I'm just a Pretty Wreck. No one knows the disaster I am, my secrets hidden behind style and a smile. I've been running for as long as I can remember, but I can't get away from the gilded cage of fame. I don't know how much longer I'll be able to keep it together. I'm forced to go back on tour to play the summer concert circuit, and so is the guy I've avoided for two years.

Quellcrist wasn't new to fame or the effect it had on a relationship. He'd been married in the spotlight for as long as he'd been famous. But that was before Hale. He knew it was going to test him, but even he hadn't known the toll that months apart would take on his fledgling relationship. Long days of shooting, different time zones, calls every day dwindled to days without calls, and rumors were all over the rags. Through it all Quell had to battle his own worst enemy, but he didn't know how to win against something inside him.

I don't think we even begin to understand love until we've lost the one we thought we'd spend the rest of our life with. I don't think we begin to understand ourselves until we realize that it's most likely our fault. And I don't think we begin to understand life until we understand it comes in so many shades of gray. You can be a good person and still do irrevocable harm. Life is messy, so f--king messy. I hate it. Or maybe I hate myself. I thought for a long time I hated him.

I thought success was what I wanted, but it only intensified my misery. Fame is a monster, and it ate me alive. I tried it all to get out of my head: sex, drugs, and rock and roll. I'm living the dream, but it only numbs the pain. Caspian came into my life like a storm, and I knew he'd leave the same way. We were two vessels made to fit. Chemistry woven in creation. There's no escape, there's no surrender. His Pretty Black forever.

I survive on avoidance. Physical pain to avoid the mental. Disposable flesh to avoid relationships. Work to avoid attachment. My club became my empire of avoidance. Inside the ring millions are won and lost. The fight is confined to breaths, actions and reactions, fists and pain. Rules don’t exist. Only my opponent exists.

I should have been on top of the world but I was trapped, suffocated by fame. My life wasn't my own. I belonged to the fans and the media. Too famous to leave my house without attracting a crowd. Fame and anxiety prevented a connection. I was doomed to stay a virgin forever, or so I thought until I fell for the one person forbidden to me: My director.