Showing results by narrator "Benjamin Powell" in All Categories
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Stoic This: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Crybabies
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether you're a philosophy enthusiast with a sense of humor or someone who's tired of being told your emotions are "irrational judgments," Stoic This delivers ancient wisdom with modern wit and just the right amount of mockery.
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Stoic This: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Crybabies
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Release date: 04-06-2025
- Language: English
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$16.43 or free with 30-day trial
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Atlas Struggled
- Ayn Rand's Selfish Delusions and the Cult of Mediocre White Men (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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In "Atlas Struggled," Sophia Blackwell delivers a hilarious and scathing takedown of Ayn Rand, the failed screenwriter who somehow convinced generations of insecure men that being selfish isn't just acceptable—it's the highest moral virtue. With her signature blend of merciless mockery and genuine insight, Blackwell dissects Rand's life and philosophy, revealing how a Russian immigrant with a persecution complex created a "philosophical" system that's really just elaborate justification for being terrible to other people.
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Atlas Struggled
- Ayn Rand's Selfish Delusions and the Cult of Mediocre White Men (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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$14.91 or free with 30-day trial
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Prison Philosophy
- How a Rich Roman Named Boethius Got Locked Up and Accidentally Invented Self-Help (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Before there was "Chicken Soup for the Soul" or "The Secret," there was a condemned Roman aristocrat writing philosophy by candlelight while awaiting execution. Meet Boethius: Rome's most overachieving nerd who went from Senate superstar to death row philosopher faster than you can say "political conspiracy."
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Prison Philosophy
- How a Rich Roman Named Boethius Got Locked Up and Accidentally Invented Self-Help (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 9 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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$14.91 or free with 30-day trial
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God's Wager: Pascal's Existential Gambling Problem
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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In God's Wager: Pascal's Existential Gambling Problem, Sophia Blackwell delivers a hilarious and irreverent guide to Blaise Pascal, the 17th-century mathematician who invented probability theory, had a religious meltdown, and decided the smartest approach to God was to treat faith like a betting strategy.
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God's Wager: Pascal's Existential Gambling Problem
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 42 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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$12.68 or free with 30-day trial
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Voltaire’s Mic Drop
- How a Skinny French Troll Invented Snark and Accidentally Enlightened Europe (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet history's original keyboard warrior—except with quills, imprisonment, and better one-liners. In "Voltaire's Mic Drop," Sophia Blackwell delivers a hilarious and irreverent guide to François-Marie Arouet (aka Voltaire), the 18th-century French philosopher who trolled kings, priests, and fellow intellectuals with such devastating wit that he had to flee across national borders multiple times to avoid imprisonment.
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Voltaire’s Mic Drop
- How a Skinny French Troll Invented Snark and Accidentally Enlightened Europe (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 31 mins
- Release date: 30-05-2025
- Language: English
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$12.68 or free with 30-day trial
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You Don’t Need a Life Coach, You Need a Lobotomy: A Brutally Honest Guide to Fixing Your Pathetic Existence
- Ruin Your Life Now, Book 25
- By: Dicholas Chad Pansy
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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This book won't change your life—because you're the only one who can do that, and let's be honest, you probably won't. But it will make you laugh, cringe in recognition, and maybe—just maybe—inspire you to stop blaming the universe for your problems and start making actual changes.
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You Don’t Need a Life Coach, You Need a Lobotomy: A Brutally Honest Guide to Fixing Your Pathetic Existence
- Ruin Your Life Now, Book 25
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Ruin Your Life Now, Book 25
- Length: 1 hr and 23 mins
- Release date: 29-05-2025
- Language: English
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$11.44 or free with 30-day trial
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Therapy Is Expensive, So I Just Gaslight Myself
- How to Save Money by Just Convincing Yourself You’re Fine (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 17)
- By: Dicholas Chad Pansy
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 41 mins
- Unabridged
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"Therapy is Expensive, So I Just Gaslight Myself" is the ultimate self-help book for people who have absolutely no intention of helping themselves. Filled with bad coping mechanisms, self-deception strategies, and the sheer audacity to pretend everything is fine, this book is here to validate your disastrous life choices.
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Therapy Is Expensive, So I Just Gaslight Myself
- How to Save Money by Just Convincing Yourself You’re Fine (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 17)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Ruin Your Life Now, Book 17
- Length: 41 mins
- Release date: 16-05-2025
- Language: English
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$10.24 or free with 30-day trial
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Live, Laugh, Lobotomy - The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Pleasantly Vacant Human
- Because Deep Thoughts Are a Liability (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 18)
- By: Dicholas Chad Pansy
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you tired of thinking until your brain hurts? Sick of caring about every little disaster life throws at you? Done with the “personal growth” scam that just leaves you broke and eating kale? Then Live, Laugh, Lobotomy is your ticket to freedom—the kind that comes from ditching stress, worries, and any shred of responsibility for a lifestyle of cheerful, blissful vacancy. This isn’t your grandma’s self-help book; it’s a sarcastic, biting manifesto for erasing overthinking and embracing the art of not giving a damn.
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Live, Laugh, Lobotomy - The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Pleasantly Vacant Human
- Because Deep Thoughts Are a Liability (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 18)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Release date: 16-05-2025
- Language: English
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$12.23 or free with 30-day trial
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I Have No Idea What I’m Doing
- A Guide to Faking Competence Until You Believe It (Or Get Caught) (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 8)
- By: Dicholas Chad Pansy
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you one minor inconvenience away from a full-blown existential crisis? Do you regularly Google how to do your own job while hoping nobody notices? Ever sat in a meeting nodding thoughtfully while having no clue what’s happening? Congratulations! You’re just like everyone else. This book is a highly questionable, deeply unserious guide to: Looking like you have your life together while internally screaming.
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I Have No Idea What I’m Doing
- A Guide to Faking Competence Until You Believe It (Or Get Caught) (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 8)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Ruin Your Life Now, Book 8
- Length: 1 hr and 12 mins
- Release date: 16-05-2025
- Language: English
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$12.23 or free with 30-day trial
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Should I Do This or That? (Wait, Let’s Reconsider Everything)
- A Guide to Making Decisions, Then Changing Your Mind 47 Times (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 15)
- By: Dicholas Chad Pansy
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 54 mins
- Unabridged
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WARNING: This is NOT a book for decisive people. If you know what you want in life and confidently make choices without having a full-blown existential meltdown, please move along. This book is for overthinkers, procrastinators, and chronically indecisive disasters who would rather launch themselves into the sun than commit to literally anything.
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Should I Do This or That? (Wait, Let’s Reconsider Everything)
- A Guide to Making Decisions, Then Changing Your Mind 47 Times (Ruin Your Life Now, Book 15)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Ruin Your Life Now, Book 15
- Length: 54 mins
- Release date: 16-05-2025
- Language: English
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$5.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Nothing Means Anything (And That's, Like, Profound)
- A Guide to Postmodernism (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Finally, a philosophy book that doesn't take itself as seriously as the theorists it eviscerates! Nothing Means Anything mercilessly skewers postmodernism's most pretentious thinkers with savage wit and zero academic mercy.
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Nothing Means Anything (And That's, Like, Profound)
- A Guide to Postmodernism (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 29 mins
- Release date: 08-05-2025
- Language: English
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$11.99 or free with 30-day trial
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What the Hell: How Wittgenstein Made Philosophy Even More Confusing While Claiming to Solve Everything
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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What the Hell tears into Ludwig Wittgenstein—history's most insufferable genius—with savage wit and zero academic pretension. Journey through the mind-bending contradictions of a trust-fund philosopher who claimed to solve all philosophical problems (twice!), while making everyone around him miserable. Discover how a man who couldn't maintain a single healthy relationship somehow revolutionized our understanding of language, meaning, and communication.
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What the Hell: How Wittgenstein Made Philosophy Even More Confusing While Claiming to Solve Everything
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 34 mins
- Release date: 06-05-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Leibniz’s Monads: Because Particles with Feelings Totally Make Sense
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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In Leibniz’s Monads: Because Particles with Feelings Totally Make Sense, Sophia Blackwell (author of Kant You Not) returns with another brutally honest, laugh-out-loud, actually-informative tour through one of philosophy’s weirdest, most ambitious systems. From the problem of evil to quantum physics, ecology to ethics, this book unpacks Leibniz’s windowless wonders and shows how his soul-marbles still haunt modern science, spirituality, and your existential crisis at 2am.
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Leibniz’s Monads: Because Particles with Feelings Totally Make Sense
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 11 mins
- Release date: 05-05-2025
- Language: English
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$11.99 or free with 30-day trial
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I Think I Own That
- John Locke’s Guide to Justifying Land Theft with Polite Language (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 57 mins
- Unabridged
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John Locke: Enlightenment philosopher, father of liberalism, inventor of “natural rights,” and accidental spiritual patron of land developers, libertarians, and your uncle who won’t shut up about property taxes.
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I Think I Own That
- John Locke’s Guide to Justifying Land Theft with Polite Language (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 57 mins
- Release date: 05-05-2025
- Language: English
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$8.74 or free with 30-day trial
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Why Did That Happen?: Aristotle Has Four Answers and None of Them Are Helpful
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Why Did That Happen? Aristotle Has Four Answers and None of Them Are Helpful is your brutally sarcastic, surprisingly educational crash course in Aristotelian philosophy—specifically his theory of causality, aka why things happen according to a man who thought everything, including acorns and chairs, had a spiritual destiny.
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Why Did That Happen?: Aristotle Has Four Answers and None of Them Are Helpful
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 13 mins
- Release date: 02-05-2025
- Language: English
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$11.99 or free with 30-day trial
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No Self, No God, No Clue: David Hume and the Joy of Destroying Everything
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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No Self, No God, No Clue: David Hume and the Joy of Destroying Everything is your ruthlessly sarcastic crash course in the philosophy of David Hume—history’s most cheerful intellectual arsonist.
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No Self, No God, No Clue: David Hume and the Joy of Destroying Everything
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Release date: 02-05-2025
- Language: English
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$11.99 or free with 30-day trial
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I Think, Therefore I’m Wrong
- Descartes and the Birth of Overconfidence
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 53 mins
- Unabridged
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I Think, Therefore I’m Wrong: Descartes and the Birth of Overconfidence is your gloriously sarcastic, brutally honest, and deeply unhinged guide to the man who launched modern philosophy with one anxious thought spiral and never looked back.
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I Think, Therefore I’m Wrong
- Descartes and the Birth of Overconfidence
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 53 mins
- Release date: 01-05-2025
- Language: English
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$8.74 or free with 30-day trial
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A Jester's Mind: Laughter, Lies, and the Bonds of Blood
- The King of Fools, Book 2
- By: Nicholas Valdes
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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In A Jester's Mind, laughter is both a weapon and a salvation. Isaak, a skilled jester, is swept into a world of hidden truths and dangerous secrets that shake the foundation of his life. As he navigates the complexities of family, duty, and joy, Isaak must confront his own purpose—and the role he must play in a kingdom on the brink of change.
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A Jester's Mind: Laughter, Lies, and the Bonds of Blood
- The King of Fools, Book 2
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: The King of Fools, Book 2
- Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins
- Release date: 21-04-2025
- Language: English
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$18.38 or free with 30-day trial
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Kant You Not
- A Categorical Imperative to Stay Awake (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 4)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever tried reading Kant and felt your brain melt into a puddle of transcendental confusion? You're not alone! "Kant You Not" is the hilarious antidote to philosophical pretension that explains Immanuel Kant's revolutionary ideas without inducing narcolepsy. In this irreverent guide to history's most unnecessarily complicated philosopher, author Sophia Blackwell translates Kantian gibberish into actual human language while mercilessly mocking his impenetrable prose, bizarre personal habits, and occasionally absurd conclusions.
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Kant You Not
- A Categorical Imperative to Stay Awake (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 4)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 45 mins
- Release date: 18-04-2025
- Language: English
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$12.68 or free with 30-day trial
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Being Really Confused: A Guide to Heidegger and Other Crimes Against Clarity
- Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 7
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Being Really Confused is the hilariously brutal, no-holds-barred, sarcasm-soaked guide to Martin Heidegger’s philosophical fever dream. Whether you’re a burned-out philosophy major, a curious masochist, or someone who just wants to sound terrifyingly deep at brunch, this book unpacks the most infamously unreadable thinker of the 20th century—with jokes, rants, and zero patience for pretension.
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Being Really Confused: A Guide to Heidegger and Other Crimes Against Clarity
- Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 7
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 2 mins
- Release date: 18-04-2025
- Language: English
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$11.99 or free with 30-day trial
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