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Hegel's Dialectic
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The Worst Ideas in Western Philosophy
- 20 Profound Thoughts That Broke Civilization (And Why Everyone Still Believes Them)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: K. D Bamon
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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This book exposes the nonsense that passes for profound wisdom in philosophy departments worldwide. You'll learn to spot bad ideas before they ruin your worldview, understand why smart people believe stupid things, and discover why that one philosophy major at every party is always so insufferable.
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The Worst Ideas in Western Philosophy
- 20 Profound Thoughts That Broke Civilization (And Why Everyone Still Believes Them)
- Narrated by: K. D Bamon
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Release date: 30-09-2025
- Language: English
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$22.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Foucault’s Power: Knowledge Is Power, Obscurity Is Apparently Also Power
- Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 3
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Foucault's Power is the antidote to pretentious philosophical obscurity you've been waiting for. This irreverent guide takes you on a sarcasm-soaked journey through Michel Foucault's most influential ideas....
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Foucault’s Power: Knowledge Is Power, Obscurity Is Apparently Also Power
- Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 3
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Release date: 17-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Hegel's Dialectic
- Making Simple Ideas Complicated Since 1807 (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 1)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you tired of pretending to understand Hegel? Do you feel personally attacked by German idealism? Have you ever wondered if “sublation” is just a fancy word for “I have no idea what I’m saying”? Congratulations. You’ve found your people.
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Hegel's Dialectic
- Making Simple Ideas Complicated Since 1807 (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 1)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 14 mins
- Release date: 15-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Kant You Not
- A Categorical Imperative to Stay Awake (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 4)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever tried reading Kant and felt your brain melt into a puddle of transcendental confusion? You're not alone! "Kant You Not" is the hilarious antidote to philosophical pretension that explains Immanuel Kant's revolutionary ideas without inducing narcolepsy.
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Kant You Not
- A Categorical Imperative to Stay Awake (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 4)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 45 mins
- Release date: 18-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Derrida's Deconstruction
- Tearing Texts Apart Because He Had Nothing Better to Do (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 2)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever wanted to sound unbearably pretentious at dinner parties? Wondered how one French philosopher managed to make an entire career out of writing sentences no human being could understand?
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Derrida's Deconstruction
- Tearing Texts Apart Because He Had Nothing Better to Do (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 2)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 2 mins
- Release date: 16-04-2025
- Language: English
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Lacan Sucks and So Do You
- A Friendly Guide to Language, Desire, and Political Helplessness (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 51 mins
- Unabridged
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What if your political identity, your core beliefs, and even your taste in snack food weren’t really yours? What if they were built out of language, hijacked by desire, and quietly manipulated by slogans, myths, and a Symbolic Order you didn’t ask to be born into?
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Lacan Sucks and So Do You
- A Friendly Guide to Language, Desire, and Political Helplessness (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 51 mins
- Release date: 01-05-2025
- Language: English
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$5.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Sartre's No Exit
- Other People Are Hell (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 6)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever found yourself staring into the void and wished it would at least tell a good joke? Wonder how a chain-smoking French philosopher with unflattering glasses became an intellectual sex symbol? Want to understand existentialism without developing an addiction to black turtlenecks and cigarettes?
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Sartre's No Exit
- Other People Are Hell (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 6)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 49 mins
- Release date: 18-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Leibniz’s Monads: Because Particles with Feelings Totally Make Sense
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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In Leibniz’s Monads: Because Particles with Feelings Totally Make Sense, Sophia Blackwell (author of Kant You Not) returns with another brutally honest, laugh-out-loud, actually-informative tour through one of philosophy’s weirdest, most ambitious systems.
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Leibniz’s Monads: Because Particles with Feelings Totally Make Sense
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 11 mins
- Release date: 05-05-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Plato's Cave: Philosophy's First Reality Show
- Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 5
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever wondered why a rich Athenian who died 2,400 years ago still dominates Western thought? Or why your professor keeps talking about invisible triangles and prisoners staring at shadows? "Plato's Cave: Philosophy's First Reality Show" is the hilarious guide to Plato you never knew you needed.
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Plato's Cave: Philosophy's First Reality Show
- Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 5
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 40 mins
- Release date: 16-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Thus Spoke My Therapist
- Nietzsche Without the Mental Breakdown (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 8)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Thus Spoke My Therapist: Nietzsche Without the Mental Breakdown is your one-way ticket to understanding one of history’s most misunderstood philosophers—without needing a doctorate or a prescription for existential dread.
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Thus Spoke My Therapist
- Nietzsche Without the Mental Breakdown (Cogito Ergo Nope, Book 8)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 22 mins
- Release date: 21-04-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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50 Philosophers You’ll Regret Reading
- Pretentious Ideas, Crushed Under the Weight of Their Own Bullsht* (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you tired of pretending to understand philosophers who write like they're being paid per syllable of confusion? This book is your revenge.
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50 Philosophers You’ll Regret Reading
- Pretentious Ideas, Crushed Under the Weight of Their Own Bullsht* (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 38 mins
- Release date: 16-06-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Existence Is Pointless (And So Is This Book)
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever wondered what would happen if someone explained existentialism without the pretentious jargon, cigarette smoke, and unbearable French ennui? Wonder no more! Existence Is Pointless (And So Is This Book) delivers all the existential dread with none of the academic torture.
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Existence Is Pointless (And So Is This Book)
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 5 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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From Bad to Worse
- How Structuralism and Post-Structuralism Ruined Everything (Including This Book) (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Finally, an academic roast that's more entertaining than a faculty meeting where someone brought donuts! "From Bad to Worse" mercilessly skewers the most pretentious philosophical movements of the 20th century with savage wit and zero academic mercy.
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From Bad to Worse
- How Structuralism and Post-Structuralism Ruined Everything (Including This Book) (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Marcus Aurelius: Meditations: The Brutally Honest Translation: What the Emperor Really Meant
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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This isn't your philosophy professor's translation. This is Marcus Aurelius like you've never seen him before—unfiltered, unhinged, and absolutely roasted. Our translator strips away all the reverent nonsense to reveal what the Emperor was REALLY saying.
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Marcus Aurelius: Meditations: The Brutally Honest Translation: What the Emperor Really Meant
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 32 mins
- Release date: 05-06-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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Plotinus Shredded
- The Decisive Dismemberment of Neoplatonic Gibberish (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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In Plotinus Shredded, we tear through his Neoplatonic fever dream. The One? A vague cosmic buzzword that explains nothing. Emanations? A divine PowerPoint presentation gone horribly wrong. The Nous?
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Plotinus Shredded
- The Decisive Dismemberment of Neoplatonic Gibberish (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 10 mins
- Release date: 05-06-2025
- Language: English
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Atlas Struggled
- Ayn Rand's Selfish Delusions and the Cult of Mediocre White Men (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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In "Atlas Struggled," Sophia Blackwell delivers a hilarious and scathing takedown of Ayn Rand, the failed screenwriter who somehow convinced generations of insecure men that being selfish isn't just acceptable—it's the highest moral virtue.
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Atlas Struggled
- Ayn Rand's Selfish Delusions and the Cult of Mediocre White Men (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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Prison Philosophy
- How a Rich Roman Named Boethius Got Locked Up and Accidentally Invented Self-Help (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Before there was "Chicken Soup for the Soul" or "The Secret," there was a condemned Roman aristocrat writing philosophy by candlelight while awaiting execution.
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Prison Philosophy
- How a Rich Roman Named Boethius Got Locked Up and Accidentally Invented Self-Help (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 9 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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God's Wager: Pascal's Existential Gambling Problem
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Think philosophy is boring? Wait until you meet the anxiety-ridden French genius who turned religion into a casino game.
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God's Wager: Pascal's Existential Gambling Problem
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 42 mins
- Release date: 09-06-2025
- Language: English
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Stoic This: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Crybabies
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether you're a philosophy enthusiast with a sense of humor or someone who's tired of being told your emotions are "irrational judgments," Stoic This delivers ancient wisdom with modern wit and just the right amount of mockery.
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Stoic This: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Crybabies
- Cogito Ergo Nope
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Release date: 04-06-2025
- Language: English
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Voltaire’s Mic Drop
- How a Skinny French Troll Invented Snark and Accidentally Enlightened Europe (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- By: Sophia Blackwell
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Length: 1 hr and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet history's original keyboard warrior—except with quills, imprisonment, and better one-liners.
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Voltaire’s Mic Drop
- How a Skinny French Troll Invented Snark and Accidentally Enlightened Europe (Cogito Ergo Nope)
- Narrated by: Benjamin Powell
- Series: Cogito Ergo Nope
- Length: 1 hr and 31 mins
- Release date: 30-05-2025
- Language: English
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$9.99 or free with 30-day trial
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