Showing results by publisher "-emdashery books-" in Humorous

Before meeting his pathetic and all-too-predictable demise in the middle of a pie-eating contest, Zack was living the high life: schlubbing around his parents' basement, subsisting on pizza, video games, computer screens, and web novels. He had it all . . . while still being a big, fat nothing. But when he's forced to ditch his pudgy mortal corpse, Zack finds himself taking the place of a recently-killed demonic sect elder known as Slifer, who—even as an elderly man—is one serious badass.

Nathan Lee has exactly three talents: overthinking social encounters, avoiding responsibility, and farming in video games. When the apocalypse hits, he accidentally dumps all his rare skill points into… fishing. Just his luck.

Corin Cadence has been summoned to meet with the Emerald Council, a political summit including the most powerful of all attuned and their closest political allies. His summons came with a dire warning—that war was coming to the nation of Valia. While Valia is no stranger to warfare, the circumstances of this invasion are dire. Valia's visage, Tenjin, remains missing. Many of the nation's leaders were slain during Mizuchi's attack, and others killed or injured through Saffron's machinations. With a critical power vacuum in Valia's leadership, few can be trusted.

When quiet Orrin and his extroverted best friend, Daniel, were transported to a strange RPG-based world, not much changed between them. Daniel became a hero of legend, while Orrin remained his unobtrusive shadow. Only when they faced a particularly lethal foe did Orrin step out of his comfort zone and display his true worth—with powers he didn't know he had. Of course, Daniel got all the glory, but Orrin doesn't mind. He's just happy they're both still alive.

Hi there! I'm Magical Girl Crystal Genocide, one of the twelve magical girls, and sworn protectors of Earth! We were like a superhero squad, but with more sparkles! We fought day and night to keep the baddies at bay and the Earth safe. But, one day, our best wasn't good enough. So, we huddled up for a superhero brainstorm and decided to pool our powers for this mega, super-duper save-the-day plan. We kinda goofed. Big time. Instead of saving the day, we accidentally wiped out a quarter of the Milky Way.

Death has been fired by the Auditors of Reality for the heinous crime of developing…a personality. Sent to live like everyone else, Death takes a new name and begins working as a farmhand. He's got the scythe already, after all. And for humanity, Death is just…gone. Which leads to the kind of chaos you always get when an important public service is withdrawn. If Death doesn't come for you, then what are you supposed to do in the meantime? You can't have the undead wandering about like lost souls—there's no telling what might happen.

Lady Katarina Ashowan is used to getting into trouble, but her latest muddle takes the cake. A moment's weakness in her attraction to Eric Reyes, crown prince of Daxaria, has landed her in an unexpected marriage with the man . . . just as her father, Lord Finlay Ashowan, arrives in Troivack to check on his headstrong daughter. As if figuring out how to acclimate her father to her scandalous elopement isn't bad enough, there are rumors of dangerous magical plots afoot at court—with Kat seemingly at the center of them all.

After the Watchers of All Worlds choose karate champion and three-time-employee of the month Jason Caulfield to lead the reformed Chroma Corps against the monsters of Lord Evilface, he ends up in charge of four female warriors, each with their own quirks. But his new life isn’t all pizza, karate, friendship, and romantic tension. The monsters he and his fellow rangers face are super dangerous... and super weird. Also, they keep making these horrible puns.

Being 16 is always difficult, even more so when there's a Death in the family. After all, it's hard to grow up normally when Grandfather rides a white horse and wields a scythe. Especially if he decides to take a well-earned moment to uncover the meaning of life and discover himself in the process, so that you have to take over the family business, and everyone mistakes you for the Tooth Fairy.

Jin Rou wanted to be a cultivator. A man powerful enough to defy the heavens. A master of martial arts. A lord of spiritual power. Unfortunately for him, he died, and now I’m stuck in his body. As Jin, I’m a man of the earth. A wielder of shovels and lord of rice and wheat. And sure, I also had to die and get pulled into another universe to end up here. But guess what? I’m starting to think it was worth it. I’ve somehow managed to get away from it all.

Kyler Stragos was once a thousand-year-old vampire, ruling as the Lord of Blood over a realm devastated by the vampire apocalypse. But even the mightiest fall. When he finally meets his end, he's the last vampire lord standing, killed by two heroes, whom he drags with him into death. (At least he has that.) But death isn't the end. Instead of eternal darkness for this soulless being, Kyler awakens in a strange world, no longer the ancient predator he once was. His new reality is a role-based leveling system in which only the strongest and rarest classes have power.

Three witches gathered on a lonely heath. A king cruelly murdered, his throne usurped by his ambitious cousin. A child heir and the royal crown, both missing.

An exclusive collection of twenty early short stories by one of the world's best loved authors, these are rediscovered tales that Pratchett wrote under a pseudonym for newspapers during the 1970s and 1980s. Whilst none of the stories are set in the Discworld, they hint towards the world he would go on to create in his award-winning and globally bestselling series, containing all of his trademark wit, satirical wisdom and fantastic imagination. These are tales which entertain, enlighten and, most importantly, make you laugh.

Follow Anthony as he attempts to adjust to his new life as an ant in his new Dungeon home. He'll have to learn how to survive, level-up, and grow both himself and his bite-sized colony into a force to be reckoned with.

Not long ago, all Belissar wanted was to be left in peace to tend his apiaries. But that ended when Ruckanos, the brutish son of the local lord, slaughtered his village to make way for his new tower. Rescued by a bee—who happened to be a core—the one-time beekeeper then became king of his own bee realm. Belissar quickly learned how to thrive not only as a leader but as a fighter, using his winged minions to battle the dreaded Hunger that threatens all life. Now, aided by the mystical bear folk who share their knowledge and wisdom with him, he must continue to grow.

Imagine a world where your position in society depended on what bit of the colour spectrum you could see. This is the world inhabited by Eddie Russett (red, middle-level) and Jane Grey (monochromatic, lowest in society). Eddie and Jane must negotiate the delicate Chromatic politics of society to find out what the 'Something that Happened' actually was, how society got to be this way, and crucially, is there Somewhere Else beyond their borders?

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a policeman taking a holiday would barely have had time to open his suitcase before he finds his first corpse. Commander Sam Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch is on holiday in the pleasant and innocent countryside, but not for him a mere body in the wardrobe. There are many, many bodies - and an ancient crime more terrible than murder. He is out of his jurisdiction, out of his depth, out of bacon sandwiches; and out of his mind. But never out of guile. Where there is a crime there must be a punishment.

The galaxy is doomed. Monkeys may be clever and too stubborn to give up, but Skippy The Idiot Who Got Played knows the harsh truth: this is a fight he can’t win. The odds are not only stacked against him, he was designed not to win this fight. Maybe he can salvage some faint memory of the civilizations that inhabit the galaxy, but those beings are doomed. Doomed. Including the Merry Band of Pirates.

The Thirsty Goat Brewpub is on the move! With the events of the Regional Octamillenial Brewing Contest behind them, the team heads to the dwarven capital to compete against the best the country has to offer. But when they arrive, they find a city in turmoil. Political factions compete for dominance in the city as the Octamillenial approaches, but Pete has more important things to worry about, like sourcing a local supplier for hops! Will Pete manage to nab the mantle of the greatest brewer? Will Penelope finally find her prince? And why are ducks so terrifying?

Having one's entire village wiped out by a high-born brute and almost dying in the process would really put a damper on things for most people. But Belissar isn't most people. Not anymore. After being saved by a little lone bee core, he found himself with his own tower and gained not only legions of cherished, fanatically loyal pollinating minions but also a host of new powers, weapons, and warriors to protect his beloved hives.