Showing results by publisher "Brilliance Audio" in Humour

"One day I was 12 years old and broke. I set out to mow some lawns with Grandpa's old riding mower. One client was Arnold the stockbroker, who offered to teach me about: the beauty of capitalism. Supply and demand. Diversifying labor. Distributing the wealth. 'It's groovy, man,' Arnold said. The grass grew, and so did business. Arnold invested my money in many things. One of them was a prizefighter. All of a sudden I was the sponsor of my very own fighter, Joey Pow."

Gary Paulsen’s slapstick tales capture the “wonderful madness” of growing up in a small town in northern Minnesota, when high spirits, showing off for girls, and general idiocy led Gary and his pals to attempt some amazing stunts! Wacky, daring, just plain nuts - extreme sports lead to extreme fun in new stories from Gary’s boyhood.

Henry Mosley decides that he and his pals Riley and Reed need to go on some earth-shaking adventures and make a name for themselves. Henry is the mastermind; Riley’s the researcher who’s prepared for anything. And somehow fearful Reed always ends up with the scariest, craziest assignments.

Anthony has returned from a trip around the world, and he’s ready to challenge Keith, the mastermind who cured the common fart, for leadership of Sweet Farts, Inc. And right now, Keith’s hold on the company is squeaking away: his sister, Emma, is his newest employee, and she cares only about her petting zoo, and his best friend, Scott, is still trying to impress everyone at the lab, even though he’s just one bad idea away from getting fired.

Oggie Cooder has a talent. He chews and carves pieces of cheese into any shape he wants them to be. This is called charving. Oggie doesn't think his charving is anything special. In fact, most of the kids in his school think it's a little weird. But then a big TV show comes to town, looking for people who have weird talents. Suddenly, Oggie is Mr. Popular...especially with Donnica Perfecto, the girl across the street who wants to be famous, no matter what.

The summer I was 12, mowing lawns with Grandpa’s old riding mower turned into big business. With advice from Arnold the stockbroker, I learned all about making money.

Thanks to his invention of Sweet Farts, the tablets that cancel even the most ripe and pungent fart smells, Keith has become the center of all kinds of attention he doesn’t want. His kid sister has turned into a farting maniac, and his parents blame him. His so-called best friends torture him at school with nicknames like “S.B.D.” (for Silent But Deadly) and try to humiliate him every chance they get. The principal wants to know what Keith’s next brilliant invention will be.

That's what Annabelle discovers on her first day in her brand-new life. Birchwood Middle School is totally different from her old all-girls elementary. In fact, lots of things in Annabelle's life are totally different now that she's back from summer camp. There's mom's new boyfriend, a new house, new friends - even a new puppy that likes to chew on Annabelle's clothes. Well, at least the puppy comes with a leash and a training manual! If only she could say the same for the boys...

Kevin has a big talent. Some might call it compulsive lying. He calls it common sense. Kev doesn’t mean to cause trouble by lying all the time; he’s just trying to make everything easier for everyone (and himself). And, of course, a few harmless, um, falsehoods are crucial to his plan to convince Tina that he’s the perfect boyfriend for her. In Gary Paulsen’s irresistible and chaotic comedy, Kevin’s lies spiral out of control until he’s faced with the need to do the unthinkable: tell the truth.

As a punishment for lying, Kevin has lost his allowance. He doesn’t lie now, but he’s broke. He’s got to find a way to make money. Lots of it, so he can impress Tina Zabinski, the World’s Most Beautiful Girl, and ask her on a date. So Kevin gets creative - and his life becomes a financial comedy of errors. Does he really have what it takes to get filthy rich at age fourteen? In Gary Paulsen’s hilarious follow-up to Liar, Liar, Kevin’s schemes lead him into situations that are sweet, some that are sticky, and some that are downright stinky.

Charlie Joe Jackson may be the most reluctant reader ever born. And so far, he’s managed to get through life without ever reading an entire book from cover to cover. But now that he’s in middle school, avoiding reading isn’t as easy as it used to be. And when his friend Timmy McGibney decides that he’s tired of covering for him, Charlie Joe finds himself resorting to desperate measures to keep his perfect record intact. This is the hilarious story of an avid non-reader and the extreme lengths to which he’ll go to get out of reading a book.

Today, Molly:Lost her Notebook (her Notebook that contained everything she needed to live. Including her homework), learned her wacky grandma Irene was coming to spend the day at school with her, got a black eye, AND was late to class. And it’s only nine a.m. Could things get any worse? You bet!

Harold Schernoff, fourteen-year-old science whiz and social outcast, has a theory to solve every problem, from dating to dealing with bullies, to making money, to playing sports, to buying a car when you’re underage. Want to learn to ski? Try: Mass x acceleration x slope of hill = EEEEEAAGGHHH! Here’s another surefire formula: Golf balls + car = BANG!Science turns slapstick when Harold and his buddy team up to test Schernoff’s Discoveries.

Mudshark is cool. He’s the go-to guy with the answers, and the mudshark Detective Agency is always on the case. At least, it is until the Psychic Parrot takes up residence in the school library. The word in school is that the parrot can out- think Mudshark. And right now, the school needs someone who’s good at solving problems. There’s an escaped gerbil running the halls’ a near-nuclear emergency in the faculty restroom, and an unexplained phenomenon involving disappearing erasers. Once Mudshark solves the mystery of the erasers, he plans to investigate the Psychic Parrot….

It’s finally summer vacation! But instead of hanging out with his friends and playing with his dogs, Charlie Joe Jackson has to face his worst fear: academic summer camp. Camp Rituhbukkee is exactly how Charlie Joe pictured it: books and nerds as far as the eye can see. It’s like permanent opposite day, where the dorks are the cool kids and the cool kids are the losers. But Charlie Joe is determined to convince the entire camp to hate reading and writing - one genius at a time. Can he pull it off? Or will he - gasp! - turn into one of them?!?!

The world’s most reluctant reader, Charlie Joe Jackson, is becoming an expert in extra credit. How is that possible? His report card is so grim that Charlie Joe has promised his parents that he’ll get straight As so they won’t send him to an academic summer camp. Now, instead of finagling ways to get out of reading, Charlie Joe is staying late after school, posing for art class, and even acting in a school play about the inventor of paper towels...all while falling for the new girl in town! If there’s one thing Charlie Joe is discovering, it’s that extra credit can definitely make your life extra complicated.

Every time Kevin Spencer sees Tina Zabinski, the Most Beautiful Girl in the World, he’s in danger of tripping, falling, and making a fool of himself. He can hardly say a word to her. But Kev knows he’d be the perfect boyfriend for Tina. He’s not bragging. Just pointing out the obvious. Kev decides to take a scientific approach to getting a date with Tina. After all, love is based on chemistry. When new kid Cash Devine zeroes in on Tina, Kevin hustles to find the formula that will make her forget all about Cash.

Tugs Esther Button was born to a luckless family. Buttons don’t presume to be singers or dancers. They aren’t athletes or artists, good listeners or model citizens. Until tomboy Tugs befriends the popular Aggie Millhouse, wins a brand-new Brownie camera in the Independence Day raffle, and stumbles into a mystery only she can solve, she looks at her hapless family and sees her own reflection looking back. But it’s a summer of change, and it just may be that in the end, being a Button is precisely what one clumsy, funny, spirited, and observant young heroine decides to make of it.

Judy Moody is making a list and checking it twice, but all her brother, Stink, wants this year is snow. It hasn’t snowed on Christmas in Virginia in more than a hundred years, however, so what are the chances that that will change? Enter the new mailman, Mr. Jack Frost, who not only looks like a jolly old elf but also seems to know a lot about weather patterns, has a fondness for the cold, and works looooooong hours during the holiday season.