Episodes

  • Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared To Start Therapy | Ep. 28

    Why You Shouldn’t Be Scared To Start Therapy | Ep. 28
    Jul 22 2025
    Therapy can be uncomfortable. But avoiding it costs way more. In this episode, Ted and Patrick break down what holds men back from starting therapy, how to get the most out of it, and what to expect once you’re in the room. Whether you’ve been thinking about going or still feel unsure, this is a good place to start. Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast 🎧New episodes every Tuesday & Thursday - Subscribe & hit the bell so you never miss one. Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome Intro 00:09 Episode Intro 00:35 The Podcast as Therapy 01:08 Two Perspectives: The Therapist and the Newcomer 01:21 Starting the Conversation on Mental Health 01:47 Why People Resist Therapy 05:38 The Breakdown That Started the Healing 11:30 Men and Emotional Processing 15:30 The Importance of Therapy as a Diagnostic Tool 15:47 Signs You Might Need Therapy 21:08 Navigating Grief and Future Relationships 22:33 The Value of Professional Support 24:20 Communication and Understanding in Therapy 26:15 Understanding Trauma and it's Misuse 29:30 The Role of Therapy in Self-Discovery 30:16 The Therapist-Client Dynamic 35:25 Navigating Emotional Vulnerability 36:16 Self-Reflection and Future Goals 38:30 The Importance of Self-Discovery in Therapy 40:07 Recognising Personal Strengths 41:48 Embracing Emotional Experiences 45:42 The Challenge of Self-Identity 51:15 Building Trust and Repairing Relationships 52:55 The Importance of Hard Conversations 54:30 Therapy as a Tool for Self-Understanding 55:20 Worthy of Love: Rebuilding Self-Worth 58:40 Navigating Therapy: Finding the Right Fit 1:24 Outro
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • The Friend Zone, Dating Burnout, and Sexual Insecurity | Ep. 27

    The Friend Zone, Dating Burnout, and Sexual Insecurity | Ep. 27
    Jul 17 2025
    Are we just close friends — or something more? In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the grey areas of modern dating and masculinity, sparked by real questions from our listeners. We unpack what it means when emotional chemistry feels like more than friendship, how to deal with dating burnout, and the unspoken fears many men have around sexual inexperience and insecurity. Whether you're stuck in the friend zone, tired of being the only one putting in effort, or wrestling with body count anxiety — this one's for you. Show Notes Cera Gibson clip credit @ceradaddygibson https://www.youtube.com/shorts/3dFHa31qxQ8 Come as You Are - Book by Emily Nagoski Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJwX: https://x.com/ManDownPodcastBluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmhoInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 00:04 Episode Intro 01:14 Reader comment #1 People-Pleasing 08:03 Is the Friend Zone Really a Problem? 01:47 Reader comment #2 Navigating Emotional Intimacy With Friendship 09:51 Reader comment #3 Taking Breaks from Romance and Focusing on Self 11:05 Comment Part 1: Dating Burnout 13:33 Comment Part 2: Dating Expectations vs Reality 16:39 How Ted Approaches Dating 17:50 Cheap Date Ideas 18:32 Don’t put some much pressure on yourself 19:50 Ted’s Two Low-Key Date Ideas 21:37 Rejection Feels Better When You’re True to Yourself 22:27 Reader comment #4 Body Count 24:00 Inexperienced Doesn’t Mean Inadequate 31:08 Why Bigger Isn’t Always Better 38:22 Reader comment #5 Friendship Fallout 41:03 Patrick’s Tips on How To Approach Repairing Broken Friendships 41:52 Ted Thoughts on Approaching Broken Friendships 47:31 Outro 48:31 Broll (Impressions, Accents and Nostalgia)
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    54 mins
  • The Dating App Lie No One Talks About | Ep. 26

    The Dating App Lie No One Talks About | Ep. 26
    Jul 15 2025
    Why does dating feel so much harder for men today? In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the hidden struggles men face in the age of dating apps and swipe culture — from feeling invisible and overlooked, to battling confusing “rules” and social atrophy that’s making real connection almost impossible. They break down why dating apps, instead of helping, might actually be making us worse at connecting — and why so many men feel lost and unsure of who to be in modern dating. If you’ve ever felt frustrated by ghosting, “confirm the date” pressures, or just the overwhelming noise of digital romance, this episode is for you. Finally, they also explore how distorted ideas of masculinity are shaping men’s experiences — and what real, meaningful connection could look like in today’s world. Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Show Notes: slutstack article referenced in the episode https://sluts.substack.com/p/play-stupid-games-win-stupid-prizesJohn Mulaney credit WIRED 2018 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psbIKH5tqiM Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome Intro 00:11 Episode Intro 01:06 Challenges of Real-Life Connection in the Dating World 03:07 The Decline of Dating Apps and Social Engagement 07:11 Why Everyone Feels Like an NPC 12:47 Social Media Controversies in Dating Culture 17:00 Navigating Compatibility and Blind Dates 18:38 The Role of Community in Dating 22:20 Masculinity and the Modern Man 26:00 Gentleness and Emotional Intelligence 30:00 Creating Opportunities for Connection 33:46 Respecting Boundaries and Self-Worth 35:40 The Human Connection in Online Dating 36:44 Tate, the Manosphere, and Faux Masculinity 38:40 Our Real Enemy: Simplistic, Misogynistic Thinking 40:00 What Is a Good Man Anymore? 40:53 Make Yourself the Product — Then Choose Wisely 41:03 Let People Fail You — Then Set Boundaries 42:11 Know Your Value, But Stay Humble 43:27 Do Men Mature Into Tenderness? 44:22 Personal Development and Relationships 46:40 Understanding Fatherhood and Self-Forgiveness 48:26 Finding Role Models and Intentional Living 51:05 Outro 51:38 Broll (Exploring Celebrity Crushes and Kinks, fun vs funny)
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    1 hr
  • Finding Purpose, Approaching Women & The Happiness Trap | Ep. 25

    Finding Purpose, Approaching Women & The Happiness Trap | Ep. 25
    Jun 26 2025
    In this episode, Ted and Patrick answer listener questions about careers, dating, and meaning. They dive into the frustration of being stuck in a 9-5 with no clear path forward, the emotional toll of job rejections despite having degrees, and the disconnect between achievement and fulfilment. They also unpack one of the biggest unspoken fears: how to actually approach women — not just with confidence, but with intention. Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 01:23 Question #1 Emotional Expression & Empathy Gap 08:14 Question #2 Finding Purpose With Work 08:29 The Upsides of a 9-5 Job 09:16 Finding Meaning and Fulfilment Beyond Work 11:29 Question #3 Navigating the Job Market 13:08 Find Work That Feels Like Play 14:15 Are Degrees Worth It? 15:31 Current Job Market Realities17:51 Question #4 How To Approach Women 22:35 Outro (Give Us Feedback!)
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    23 mins
  • How to Build Confidence Without Faking It | Ep. 24

    How to Build Confidence Without Faking It | Ep. 24
    Jun 24 2025
    In this episode, Ted and Patrick unpack the blurry line between confidence and arrogance. They explore what it means to build real confidence—not just perform it—and how to root it in genuine self-worth. Drawing from their experiences as public voices in football commentary, they ask: How do you know when you’re veering into arrogance? What does it take to stay grounded while still backing yourself? From handling criticism to building inner systems for self-belief, this is a sharp, honest conversation about identity, feedback, and the work of becoming truly self-assured. Show Notes: The Transfer Flow newsletter referenced in the episode https://www.thetransferflow.com/p/be-intellectually-honest-but-f-ck-a-hater-89d0 Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 01:43 Why Patrick and Ted’s Football Takes Get Called Arrogant 02:48 Defining Self-Worth, Confidence and Arrogance 04:13 Why Ted Responded to Arrogance Criticism: Cultural Clashes & Track Record Explained 09:28 Patrick Shares His Perspective on Being Labeled Arrogant 11:28 Ted’s Reply to Criticism — Featured in the TransferFlow Newsletter14:58 Abilities vs. Qualities: The Arrogance Line 16:00 What does it mean to be self-confident? 19:38 The Roots of Ted’s Self-Confidence 22:06 It’s Okay to Fail — Your Worth Isn’t Defined by One Outcome 24:30 Confidence grows from self-worth 27:00 Expertise vs. Overconfidence 29:35 We learn self-worth at school, but not how to explore it. 29:50 We all share the same journey of failure and growth. 30:18 How Patrick earned the right to claim more confidence31:50 Ted’s Advice on Confidence 35:20 Patrick’s Take: Internal Qualities and Self-Worth 38:38 Social Media: Where Toxicity Meets Opportunity 41:40 Low Self-Worth: Influences & Inner Voice 46:30 Two Paths After Arrogance: Denial or Growth 47:40 Ted on Dismissing Earned Praise and Compliments 52:39 Why Some People Struggle to Accept Compliments 55:00 Patrick’s Struggle With Praise and Self-Worth 56:40 How to Respond When Your Partner Rejects a Compliment57:30 Why Working on Your Self-Worth Matters 58:52 Patrick’s Thoughts on Being Called Arrogant 1:02:19 Ted on Constantly Growing His Expertise 1:04:34 Patrick on Saying ‘I Don’t Know’ 1:07:20 Tips for Rebuilding Self-Talk and Setting Boundaries 1:16:55 Wrap-Up & Reflections 1:19:12 Outro 1:19:27 Broll
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    1 hr and 22 mins
  • If You’re Avoiding Hard Conversations... This Is For You | Ep. 23

    If You’re Avoiding Hard Conversations... This Is For You | Ep. 23
    Jun 19 2025
    Avoiding hard conversations can hold you back in your relationships, career, and personal growth. In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into practical frameworks to help you start and navigate those tough talks with confidence — without losing your cool or shutting down. You’ll learn: - Why we resist difficult conversations and how to overcome it - How to mentally prepare before the talk to minimise emotional triggers - What to say, what not to say, and how to express yourself clearly - How to stay calm and listen actively, even when things get tense - Ways to reflect on the outcomes and decide your next steps Whether it’s about money, family, or your relationship, this episode is for anyone who’s been avoiding “that talk.” Real change starts with speaking your truth — and we’re here to guide you through it. Follow us on our Socials - YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJwX: https://x.com/ManDownPodcastBluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmhoInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 01:05 Hard Conversations for Ted 02:08 Hard Conversations for Patrick 03:43 Avoid the Talk. Pay the Price. 06:13 Intro into Navigating Hard Conversations 07:30 Where Does the Stress Start? 13:30 Hard Conversations Ted is Good at Having 14:12 Understanding Personal Triggers in Conversations It Starts With an Honest Conversation 16:09 Negotiating Vulnerability in Tough Talks 18:41 Finding Common Ground in Hard Conversations 20:08 Navigating Hard Conversations 24:50 How to Prepare for Tough Talks 28:20 Strategies for Effective Communication 28:50 Prepare, Script, and Influence: Keys to Effective Hard Talks 33:00 The Importance of Follow-Up 34:11 How to Stay Open and Collaborative in Hard Conversations 39:30 Building Long-Term Relationships Through Communication 44:15 How Patrick Approaches Hard Conversations 46:45 Navigating Unexpected Conversations 52:55 The Importance of Reflection and Follow-Up 53:31 Wrapping It Up: Patrick’s Advice on Hard Conversations 56:55 If Patrick and Ted Had a Hard Conversation… 58:05 Outro (Wit vs Puns, Mission Impossible, Jackie Chan, follow us on social media)
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • Body Count, Spark & Sex — Unpopular Takes That Actually Make Sense | Ep. 22

    Body Count, Spark & Sex — Unpopular Takes That Actually Make Sense | Ep. 22
    Jun 17 2025
    In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive into the relationship opinions no one wants to admit — but everyone needs to hear. From the myth of the “spark” on the first date to body count, casual sex, and whether men and women can really just be friends — we’re unpacking the unpopular takes that actually make sense when you look a little closer. If you’re tired of surface-level dating advice and want something real, intentional, and honest — this one’s for you. Follow us on our Socials: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJw X: https://x.com/ManDownPodcast Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmho Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 0:00 Intro 00:50 Unpopular Opinion #1 Cut Ties with Your Ex Before You Date 02:49 Unpopular Opinion #2 Men and Women Can’t Be Just Friends 09:48 The Versions of Ourselves We Close Off 11:57 Parenting and Personal Identity 14:13 When Your Toddler Repeats the Unrepeatable 15:26 Unpopular Opinion #3 Losing Your Virginity Is Overhyped 22:00 Unpopular Opinion #4 Expecting spark on first date 24:00 Signs There’s a Spark on a Date 25:45 Reasons/causes of no spark on first date - why you should give a person a second chance 27:45 First Impressions & Attraction 29:00 Passive vs Active Dating 32:11 Unpopular Opinion #5 If It’s Not a Special Occasion, Go Half 33:37 Unpopular Opinion #6 There Is One Person for Everyone 35:40 Unpopular Opinion #7 If It’s Right, It Will Be Easy 38:47 Unpopular Opinion #8 High Body Count? I’m Out 43:00 How Important is the Number? 48:33 Bonus Unpopular Opinion 48:15 The $15k Girlfriend: When Dating Gets Transactional 48:38 Old School vs. New School: Dating as a Marketplace 49:13 Patrick filling Ted’s emotional hole 49:50 Dating, But Make It a Business Deal 52:24 Marriage Math: What Is a Stay-at-Home Parent Worth? 53:38 Talking Money, Kids & Roles — Before Marriage 58:50 Love Can’t Be an Equation — Can It? 59:20 It’s Not Romance — It’s Strategy 1:00:20 The Dynamics of Financial Support in Relationships 1:05:40 The Complexity of Emotional and Financial Support 1:08:29 When Sex Work Enters the Relationship Zone 1:09:15 Relationships Are Never 50/50 1:12:37 Outro (send us your questions!)
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    1 hr and 16 mins
  • How to Find Your Style as a Man (No Fashion Knowledge Needed) | Ep. 21

    How to Find Your Style as a Man (No Fashion Knowledge Needed) | Ep. 21
    Jun 10 2025
    What if your clothes weren’t just about looking good — but about being seen? In this episode, Ted and Patrick dive deep into the intersection of fashion, masculinity, and identity. Why do so many men keep it muted, minimal, and safe — and why does anything beyond that feel off-limits? They explore: The fear of standing out vs. the desire to be respected The myth of “I’ll dress better once I’m in shape” How minimalism became the emotional safe zone for men Why style is still seen as feminine unless you’re famous or jacked And how dressing well can change your self-image — even if you’re a dad with no time Also: watches, knits, trainers, and why you don’t need to be stylish to start caring about style. This isn’t about trends. It’s about ownership. Of your look, your energy, and your right to feel good in your skin. Follow us on our Socials:YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLzsGH4hM9TxHC4hHPvgMJwX: https://x.com/ManDownPodcastBluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lm4shifbvs6k63eb54k2gmhoInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mandown.podcast/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mandownpodcast Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 00:45 Fashion and Masculinity: How Menswear Got Deep 01:47 Expressing Yourself Through What You Wear 05:05 When Clothes Feel Like a Spotlight: Fear of Being Seen 06:16 Minimalism: Love or Loathe? 08:28 How Dressing Well Became an Act of Self-Respect 10:39 What Set Ted on His Style Path 12:10 Body Image and Clothing Choices 14:51 Why Good Shape Doesn’t Equal Good Style 15:30 The Awkward Phase of Teen Fashion 15:57 Ted’s Cashmere Hoodie: Casual Meets Class 16:40 Practical Fashion: Finding Joy in Dressing Well 18:37 Breaking Free from ‘Minimalism’ and Embracing Expression 19:54 Elevated Basics & The Myth of Effortless Style 21:26 The Thrifting Experience 25:23 When Style Meets Sustainability 28:00 Why Men’s Fashion Can Feel Like a Body-Shaming Club 30:03 Cultural Influences on Fashion Choices 30:50 Finding Your Unique Look and Owning It 33:30 How to Peacock Subtly: Suits, Ties, and Statement Pieces 36:18 Why Knitwear Is Worth the Investment 37:08 Ted’s Watch Collection 41:44 Ted’s Favourite Shoes 43:33 Fashion as Personal Expression 45:00 Breaking the Mold: Dressing Outside Traditional Masculine Silhouettes 45:48 The Danger of Getting Hooked on Watches & Sneakers 47:03 Why Dropping 30K on Brunello Cuccinelli Is a Pose 47:33 Outerwear: The First Step into Men’s Fashion 48:22 Male Fashion: More Than Just Trousers and T-Shirts 48:30 Breaking Down Men’s Jewelry Preferences 50:24 Ted’s Leather Bomber Quest 50:38 Ted’s Top Knitwear Picks and Brand Recommendations 56:12 Why Thrifted Knitwear & Vintage Coats Are Worth It 01:01:53 Ted’s Thrifting Adventures with a Model 01:02:55 Patrick’s Simple Trick for Finding Quality Fabrics 01:04:02 When Fashion Talk Turns to Rap 01:07:05 Practical Thrifting Tips 01:13:00 Ted and Patrick: London Meet Up 01:14:52 Patrick & Ted on Comfort, Confidence & Having Fun With Clothes 01:15:15 Finding Your Style: Embracing Individuality in Fashion 01:22:12 Exploring Fashion Beyond Gender Norms & Finding Your Personal Style 01:23:24 Outro
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    1 hr and 24 mins