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ADHD Mums

ADHD Mums

By: Jane McFadden
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 Being a mum is hard enough. Being a mum with ADHD — or raising neurodivergent kids is a whole different level. ADHD Mums is the unfiltered, science-meets-reality podcast hosted by Jane McFadden, educational neuroscientist, advocate, and mother of three. This isn’t another polished parenting show with 'ten easy tips.' It’s real stories, confessions we’re not supposed to say out loud, and the research that explains why so many of us are running on empty. Every week you’ll hear: 🎙️ Confessions — raw, anonymous truths from mums navigating rage, burnout, and survival. 🧠 Expert insights — from neuroscientists, clinicians, and policy leaders on ADHD, autism, and mental health. 💬 Advocacy in action — exposing ADHD medication shortages, NDIS red tape, and the hidden costs mothers carry. With over 1 million downloads already tuning in from across the world, the podcast has already influenced ADHD reforms in Australia, been featured in national media, and pushed politicians to answer the questions mothers are asking. If you’ve ever screamed in the car, forgotten every form until the night before, or wondered if you’re the only one falling apart — this podcast is your proof that you’re not broken, you’re just telling the truth.2025 Jane McFadden Hygiene & Healthy Living Parenting & Families Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships Social Sciences
Episodes
  • 87. When Being Reasonable Gets You Nowhere at School

    87. When Being Reasonable Gets You Nowhere at School
    Mar 4 2026
    You’ve sent the emails.You’ve attended the meetings.You’ve tried to be calm, collaborative, reasonable.And nothing changes.Then suddenly something serious happens — a suspension, an incident, a formal complaint — and overnight the school moves quickly.So what just happened?This episode unpacks the moment many ADHD mums eventually hit: the point where being reasonable stops working — and why that happens inside the school system.Because for many families, the problem isn’t communication.It’s understanding what schools actually respond to, what they quietly ignore, and how the system itself shapes those responses.WHAT WE COVERWhy being calm, collaborative and ‘reasonable’ often doesn’t move schoolsWhat schools actually respond to — and what gets quietly ignoredWhy emotional emails and long explanations often backfireThe reality behind ‘reasonable adjustments’ under Australian education lawWhy some adjustments are refused even when they appear simpleThe funding model most parents have never heard of: NCCDWhy teachers may genuinely say they can’t do something — even when it seems obviousThe difference between fairness and inclusion in schoolsWhen escalating a complaint becomes necessary (and how to do it properly)Why documentation, meeting notes and evidence matter far more than emotionTHIS EPISODE IS FOR YOU IF…You feel like you’ve been polite, patient and collaborative… and nothing has changedYour child’s school says they ‘can’t’ implement adjustments that seem reasonableYou’ve asked for incident reports or documentation and never received themMeetings feel confusing or adversarialYou’re not sure when to keep negotiating and when to escalateYou’re trying to advocate for your child without becoming ‘that parent’ABOUT TODAY’S GUESTSara HockingEducational disability advocate supporting families navigating school discrimination, failed adjustments and escalation processes.Sarah works directly with families across Australia dealing with school-based disability support issues and understands both the legal framework and the practical realities of how schools respond.LEGISLATION REFERENCEDDisability Discrimination Act 1992 (Cth)Disability Standards for Education 2005 (Cth)These laws outline the obligation for Australian schools to provide reasonable adjustments for students with disability, provided those adjustments do not create an unjustifiable hardship for the school.FUNDING MODEL MENTIONEDNationally Consistent Collection of Data on School Students with Disability (NCCD)The NCCD is the Australian Government framework used to determine funding and support levels for students with disability in schools.Many parents assume funding follows their child directly to the school.In reality, the system is far more complex — and often much less transparent.FIND SARA HERESara Hocking – Educational Disability Advocatewww.seebeyondau.orgRELATED ADHD MUMS EPISODES🎧 When School Decides Your Child Is the Problemhttps://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/when-school-decides-your-child-is-the-problem/🎧 Raising Strong Children: How to Support Without Always Solving Their Problemshttps://adhdmums.com.au/raising-strong-children/FREE PARENT RESOURCES📘 The School Choice Kithttps://adhdmums.com.au/product/the-school-choice-kit/SHARE YOUR SCHOOL EXPERIENCEIf you’ve experienced school pushback, refused adjustments, or confusing processes around disability support, you can share your experience here:https://form.jotform.com/251238118486864Your experiences help shape future episodes and resources for other ADHD mums navigating the same systems.
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    35 mins
  • 86. When Teachers Care — But the System Still Breaks Kids

    86. When Teachers Care — But the System Still Breaks Kids
    Mar 2 2026
    There is a particular kind of confusion that happens when your child likes their teacher.If you’ve ever thought, ‘But she’s so lovely… why isn’t this working?’This episode is for you.WHY THIS MATTERSSometimes the problem is the gap between teacher intention and system capacity.A teacher can care deeply.A teacher can try hard.A teacher can be doing their best in a room full of kids who all need something different.And still… your child keeps escalating, shutting down, falling apart, or being labelled as ‘behavioural’.Not because your kid is the problem.And not because the teacher doesn’t care.But because the system is rigid, under-resourced, and built for compliance — not regulation, flexibility, or neurodivergent reality.WHAT WE COVERThe ‘she’s lovely… but it’s still not working’ gap (teacher intention vs system capacity)Why teachers end up buying sensory tools and resources with their own moneyWhat school funding often gets spent on instead (and why it’s not always what kids need)Why neurodivergent supports should be universal, not ‘special’ (the wobble chair example)How rigid systems create the ‘bad behaviour’ narrative when teachers don’t have toolsWhy fear-based discipline ‘worked’ back then (and why it’s not motivation — it’s trauma)The missing piece: what teachers can do (scripts, toolkits, repair) when punishment is off the tableWhy a child walking out can be a skill, not ‘truancy’ — and what a supportive response looks likeTHIS EPISODE IS FOR YOU IF…Your child likes their teacher but school is still going downhillYou’re stuck between ‘they’re trying’ and ‘this is not working’You’re watching schools spend money on optics while teachers fund basicsYou’ve been told your child is ‘naughty’ when you know it’s dysregulationYou’re exhausted from advocating and still feel like nothing changesYou want practical, real-world strategies that work in a classroom of 30 — not theoryRELATED ADHD MUMS EPISODES🎙️ When Teachers Care — But the System Still Breaks Kids🎧 1️⃣ When School Decides Your Child Is the Problemhttps://adhdmums.com.au/adhd-podcast-episodes/when-school-decides-your-child-is-the-problem/🎧 2️⃣ SCHOOL SERIES – When School Becomes the Traumahttps://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/s2-ep2-school-series-when-school-becomes-the-trauma-what-no-one-tells-adhd-parents/🎧 3️⃣ IEP Meetings Are Broken — Here’s What to Say Insteadhttps://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/episode-9-when-the-iep-meeting-feels-like-a-battle-you-didnt-ask-for/🎧 4️⃣ Being Judged for Choosing Understanding Over Punishmenthttps://adhdmums.com.au/podcast_episode/being-judged-adhd-discipline-myth📬 Check out my Free Resources on Schools:Bullying Response Kit https://adhdmums.com.au/product/bullying-response-kit-adhd-mums/The School Choice Kithttps://adhdmums.com.au/product/the-school-choice-kit/ADHD School Prep Kithttps://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-school-prep-kit/Quiet Exclusion Kithttps://adhdmums.com.au/product/quiet-exclusion-kit/Explaining ADHD to Kids – Parents Guidehttps://adhdmums.com.au/product/explaining-adhd-to-kids-parents-guide/📬 Check out my Paid Resource on Schools:Making School Work – Parent Guide ($20)https://adhdmums.com.au/product/making-school-work-parent-guide/📬 Listener Questions & Community🎙️ Ask a Listener Question (voice)Voice notes are preferred when possible — hearing your voice helps add context — but you’re very welcome to submit a written question instead.Send me a WhatsApp voice message here:https://wa.me/61403457313✍️ Ask a Listener Question (written)https://form.jotform.com/251238118486864👥 Join the ADHD Mums Facebook GroupFor community, shared language, and conversations with other mums who get it.https://www.facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast
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    34 mins
  • 85. Is the Problem the Child — Or the Learning Plan?

    85. Is the Problem the Child — Or the Learning Plan?
    Feb 25 2026

    You’re sitting in a meeting thinking you’re here to talk about support.

    There’s a plan. There are ‘adjustments’.

    And yet your child is still escalating… and suddenly the school is hinting at removal, reduced hours, or ‘this isn’t the right setting’.

    This episode is the practical middle bit no one gives you:

    When a plan exists, but it’s either the wrong plan — or it’s not actually being applied.

    WHY THIS MATTERS

    When a school says ‘the plan isn’t working’, it often gets translated as ‘your child is the problem’.

    But plans fail for predictable reasons:

    1. they’re too big and unworkable in a class of 28
    2. no one is actually implementing them consistently
    3. teachers don’t understand the ‘why’ behind the strategies
    4. the plan ignores language processing, sensory load, or demand avoidance
    5. there’s no review cycle, no accountability, no data, just documentation
    6. the teacher doesn't have the capacity to implement the plan in the classroom due to numbers and workload.

    And when the plan becomes a ‘set and forget’ document, you get stuck in a dangerous loop:

    ‘We tried everything’ → escalation continues → the child gets labelled → exclusion gets normalised.

    WHAT WE COVER

    1. Why an IEP is a start, not a manual
    2. How ‘too many strategies at once’ makes a plan fail fast
    3. What to ask when the school says ‘we’ve tried everything’
    4. How to check if staff actually understand what’s on the plan
    5. Why ‘accommodation’ can trigger teacher resistance — and how ‘considerations’ changes the tone
    6. The missing piece in most behaviour plans: language processing and communication load
    7. How literal thinking, vague instructions, and high language demand can create ‘refusal’ and shutdown
    8. How to build accountability into the plan (review dates, outcomes, roles, communication method)
    9. Red flags that the school has decided your child is ‘too hard’
    10. Green flags that the team is still in curiosity, collaboration, and problem-solving
    11. Orchid vs dandelion kids: when pushing through builds resilience, and when it becomes trauma

    THIS EPISODE IS FOR YOU IF…

    1. your child has a plan at school but behaviour is still escalating
    2. you keep hearing ‘we’re doing everything’ but nothing changes
    3. the teacher looks overwhelmed and the plan feels impossible in real life
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    44 mins
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