Showing results by narrator "Lorain O'Neil" in All Categories

When the aliens’ experiment on Mark teaches him a little too much, Mark is able to accidentally steal an alien ship and plunge back to Earth, only to land smack into the clutches of General Peerless and Dr. Montgomery, the warring codirectors of Little Island, the US government’s secret facility where the government “collects” abducted returnees. Being the only person who can (sort of) fly the spacecraft makes Mark just what the government is looking for, but an imprisoned life on Little Island isn’t exactly what Mark had in mind.

Waking up in a spaceship, kidnapped and back in her 18-year-old body, isn't the kind of thing that's supposed to happen to Miri. But with everyone insisting she’s the Adrus, the lost given God of the Adruminion, relentlessly lusted after by the Demesdom, it just isn’t doing her any good arguing that, heh, she can’t even tweet! Spirited away to the Adrumininum, Miri learns that it’s an empire ruled by her former (who’s quite definite on being her current) mate, and that it’s at war with the Demesdom, a realm ruled by the man she once desired.

It killed a hundred million people! The most lethal event ever to hit humanity ravaged the world in 1918. But one victim was actually murdered and a century later newly graduated (i.e. unemployed) Library Science Minor Eileen Saffron scrambles to unmask the shocking truth, rousing a deadly family ghost?

Vezerine society works. Sort of. Since burning a special fuel rock, the Vezerine's power needs have been met. But now, Vezerine men can’t father daughters and even with cloning, extinction looms. Or, as the fairies say, to err is mortal but to really foul up requires the Vezerine. Jozef is offered the last female who isn't what she appears to be and, worse, is on a mission from those fairies: destroy the fuel rock mine.

Remy's just graduated college and...been kidnapped! And she doesn't have the vaguest idea why. But intractable businessman Isaiah Grommet knows why, knows what he's purchased, knows what Remy was bred for, knows what she is: a Liar Charm. Remy and her newfound little talent will be invaluable to his billionaire empire - voluntary or not! But when it comes to gilded servitude, hipster Remy has some pretty intractable ideas of her own, creatively inventive ones if you want to be charitable, brain-bleached hilarious ones if you want to be accurate.

Seven-year-old Polonia Appleseed cowered in terror the night her daddy died and the unknown killer escaped, a pair of sparkly hearted men’s underwear the only clue. But Polonia’s grown up now, and with all the suspects gathering after her uncle George’s unfortunately fatal buttocalypse, Polonia’s decided to let one rip of her own; she'll lure the killer out of hiding by doing exactly what her daddy did: scam millions right under everyone’s noses!

Nuns. Super Soakers. Oversexed Assistants! An ancient organization of women who suck cruelty out of people tasks one surly centenarian with a bubble-brained teenager to save the world. Yup, the world is in some pretty deep doo-doo. Bonus chapters from some of the author’s other books are included.