Showing results by narrator "Joe Thomas" in All Categories

Lawyer turned murderer Björn wants to stop killing. Unfortunately, the prisoner in his basement is getting restless, the parents' committee at his daughter's preschool is clamouring for his attention, and to cap it all, he's also being blackmailed. To manage all this stress, he turns to a mindfulness coach to learn about the unmet needs of his inner child. As he begins listening to this inner child, he finds it doesn't just have needs, but solutions: creative ways he can solve his problems. All of them.

When bizarre magical disappearances disrupt shows around the city, Esther receives a mysterious warning not to go on with her off-Broadway show. Desperate to stay on stage rather than resort to waiting tables, Esther turns to her new BFF, Dr. Maximillian Zadok, a 350-year-old mage whose day job is protecting New York from Evil. Determined to get to the bottom of this mystery without losing her job, Esther and Max team up with a conjuring cowboy, a banker with stage aspirations, and a flock of fearless drag queens. 

You think it will never happen to you: the ring of the bell, the policeman on the doorstep. What he says traps you in a nightmare that starts with the words, 'I'm afraid…' Sally Lambert is also afraid, and desperate enough to consider the unthinkable. Is it really, definitely, impossible to escape from this horror? Maybe not. There’s always something you can do, right? Of course, no one would ever do this particular something–except the Lamberts, who might have to.

The sun is setting on humanity. The night now belongs to voracious demons that prey upon a dwindling population forced to cower behind half-forgotten symbols of power. Legends tell of a Deliverer: a general who once bound all mankind into a single force that defeated the demons. But is the return of the Deliverer just another myth? Perhaps not. Out of the desert rides Ahmann Jardir, who has forged the desert tribes into a demon-killing army. He has proclaimed himself Shar’Dama Ka, the Deliverer and he carries ancient weapons - a spear and a crown - that give credence to his claim.

On the night of the new moon, the demons rise in force, seeking the deaths of two men both of whom have the potential to become the fabled Deliverer, the man prophesied to reunite the scattered remnants of humanity in a final push to destroy the demon corelings once and for all. Arlen Bales was once an ordinary man, but now he has become something more - the Warded Man, tattooed with eldritch wards so powerful they make him a match for any demon. Arlen denies he is the Deliverer at every turn, but the more he tries to be one with the common folk, the more fervently they believe. 

Private first-class Wayson Harris was raised in a U.A. orphanage among thousands of clones born and bred as the ultimate soldiers. But Harris isn't like the other Marines: He has a mind of his own. He figures he's paying for that independent streak when his first assignment out of boot camp is the smallest Marine outpost in the whole U.A. When a rogue general surfaces, the remote desert world Harris thought was a dead-end posting becomes anything but. Fighting off the general's raid gains Harris a promotion. But it also brings him to the attention of some unfriendly U.A. leaders.

It’s Christmas Eve, and Maisie is convinced her boyfriend, Lucas, is totally going to propose. The cookies are baked, the mood is set, and her ring finger is perfectly poised. But when a confused elderly woman wanders into their home and claims it as her own, the couple’s plans are quickly thwarted.

Mankind has ceded the night to the corelings, demons that rise up out of the ground each day at dusk, killing and destroying at will until dawn, when the sun banishes them back to the Core. As darkness falls, the world’s few surviving humans hide behind magical wards, praying the magic can see them through another night. As years pass, the distances between each tiny village seem longer and longer. It seems nothing can harm the corelings, or bring humanity back together.

Jaxon Stone has built a life in Oak Island, North Carolina, one of the most beautiful beach towns on the East Coast. A successful financial advisor by day and the town’s most eligible bachelor by night, Jaxon has long accepted his routine—until one fateful day at Atlanta’s airport changes everything. Claire never expected her two-week summer escape with her sister and friends to turn into something more. But when she meets Jaxon, their chemistry is undeniable.

Björn has been given an ultimatum: repair his work-life balance, or his wife Katharina will leave him - and take their daughter. He reluctantly starts a mindfulness class and to his surprise, it's a revelation. He becomes calmer, more focused, and he's starting to understand what's really important in life. So when his client and brutal crime boss Dragan Sergowicz tries to interfere with his precious family time, Björn remembers his new-found goal to find serenity - and kills him.

Two happy couples. One dead body. A whole load of secrets. Married life wasn't meant to start like this. On honeymoon in Bali, you hit it off with another newlywed couple and celebrate your last night at a fancy cliff-side restaurant. No one predicted the evening would end with a dead body. But...

Nathan Stone, The Gunfighter, lies dead in the street, a victim of the ruthless Sandlin gang. Behind him he leaves his guns and the son he had hardly known - a former lawman named Wes is about to teach these killers just what it means to be his father's son. Swearing vengeance, he takes up his father’s guns. But little does he know that the odds are even more against him than he thinks - and that to get revenge for a dead man, he might have to die himself.

Luke is a comic-mad 11-year-old who shares a tree house with his geeky older brother, Zack. Luke's only mistake is to go for a wee right at the wrong time. While he's gone, an alien gives his undeserving, never-read-a-comic-in-his-life brother superpowers and then tells him to save the universe. Luke is massively annoyed about this, but when Zack is kidnapped by his archnemesis, Luke and his friends have only five days to find him and save the world.... Hilariously narrated by Joe Thomas.

The sun is setting on humanity. The night now belongs to voracious demons that prey upon a dwindling population forced to cower behind half-forgotten symbols of power. Legends tell of a Deliverer: a general who once bound all mankind into a single force that defeated the demons. But is the return of the Deliverer just another myth? Perhaps not. Out of the desert rides Ahmann Jardir, who has forged the desert tribes into a demon-killing army. He has proclaimed himself Shar’Dama Ka, the Deliverer and he carries ancient weapons - a spear and a crown - that give credence to his claim. 

Deep beneath the ice of the Arctic Circle, something has awakened. A primordial creature frozen in time, it is the oldest, largest, most efficient predator that nature has ever produced. And it is ravenously hungry.... Thirty-five miles off the Massachusetts coast, a small research ship is attacked. All but one of its crew is killed by the massive serpentine horror that rises from the sea. The creature likes this human prey. The chewy outer hide. The tender saltiness within. And it wants more....

The sun is setting on humanity. The night now belongs to voracious demons that prey upon a dwindling population forced to cower behind half-forgotten symbols of power. Legends tell of a Deliverer: a general who once bound all mankind into a single force that defeated the demons. But is the return of the Deliverer just another myth? Perhaps not. Out of the desert rides Ahmann Jardir, who has forged the desert tribes into a demon-killing army.

Necromance-for-hire Dante Valentine is choosy about her jobs. Hot-tempered and with nerves of steel, she can raise the dead like nobody’s business. But one rainy Monday morning, everything goes straight to Hell. The Devil hires Dante to eliminate a renegade demon: Vardimal Santino. In return, he will let her live. It’s an offer she can’t refuse. There’s just one catch. How do you kill something that can’t die?

David "Rusty" Shannon is the member of a "ranging company" attempting to protect Texas settlers from Comanche depredations. He learns that the rangers are being disbanded. He makes his way home to his farm on the Colorado River, and discovers that the land around his home is filled with hostiles — Indians, Confederates, and conscription-dodging renegades.

In the west, there’s always work for the kind of men willing to get their hands dirty — from rounding stray cattle to stringing barbed wire. Bo Creel and Scratch Morton are just such men. Now they’ve been hired for the one job they’ve never tried: wearing badges — in a little stain of a town called Whiskey Flats.

Necromance-for-hire Dante Valentine is choosy about her jobs. Hot-tempered and with nerves of steel, she can raise the dead like nobody’s business. But one rainy Monday morning, everything goes straight to Hell. The Devil hires Dante to eliminate a renegade demon: Vardimal Santino. In return, he will let her live. It’s an offer she can’t refuse. There’s just one catch. How do you kill something that can’t die?