Showing results by publisher "Audible Studios" in Comedy & Humour

From New York Times best-selling author Kim Karr comes a flirty new love story. The whole stethoscope-and-white coat thing isn't my cup of tea. I prefer a man with an artistic vein in his body and 9-to-5 hours. And I can definitely do without the half-lidded, sleepy bedroom eyes. (Okay, so those are kind of sexy.) Tall, dark, and handsome doesn't change the fact that he's arrogant, cocky, and rude. Not that I care, but he's made it clear he wants nothing to do with a quirky girl like me, which is why he said no. Turns out no isn't an option.

After three centuries trapped underground, thousand-year-old Yulric Bile, also known as The Cursed One, The Devil's Apprentice, He Who Worships the Slumbering Horrors, awakens only to find that no one believes he is a vampire. Apparently he's just too ugly. Modern vampires, he soon discovers, are pretty, weak, and, most disturbing of all, good.

At 23 years old and still celibate against his will, Wes has run the numbers: It is officially more likely an asteroid will kill him before he ever ends up naked in someone else's bed. What's his problem, you ask? He couldn't tell you. Wes likes bars, booze, and fun; he has a job, an apartment, and no major deformities.... What more does a 20-something need to be a bit of a slut now and then!? In his quest to lose his virginity and join the legions of normal, sex-having adults, Wes gets everything but lucky.

All secret agents need to look out for William Nye, now known as Agent X. His recruitment was simple and his legend is brilliant but un-earned. Somehow, he thinks he's the best there is and we all know how pride goeth before a fall. The master of SF hilarity and biting social satire creates a spy world that has gathered praise from the greats of the genre.

Actor Stephen Tobolowsky has appeared in over 200 movies and television shows. He has played everyone from Ned Ryerson in Groundhog Day to Sandy Ryerson in Glee. He has amused thousands with his true stories on The Tobolowsky Files at Slashfilm.com and iTunes. Here he shares some homespun philosophy and more true stories that prove tales of sex, drugs, and rock and roll are often the most humiliating and almost always the most enjoyable.

Santa's helpers don't always dispose of bodies, but that's what Tucker Smith is doing right now. Specifically, the body of his own Santa - one of thousands worldwide - who was just murdered in an apparent random act of violence. Now, Tucker will have to somehow manage to deliver Christmas to his assigned region while he struggles to patch things up with his family, all while training the replacement sent to him by The Organization and trying to uncover the mystery of who killed Santa. And there's only five days left until Christmas.

Based on the column of the same name that appeared in The Toast, Hey Ladies! is a laugh-out-loud listen that follows a fictitious group of eight 20- and-30-something female friends for one year of holidays, summer house rentals, dates, brunches, breakups, and, of course, the planning of a disastrous wedding. This instantly relatable story is told entirely through emails, texts, DMs, and every other form of communication known to man.

Prepare to enter the world of love-affair friendships, cuddle buddies, metamours, platonic partners, logical family, post-romance break-up energy, platonic snogging, romantic footprints and date substitutes.... Part memoir, part sociological study, Is Monogamy Dead? highlights the huge disparities in how people define a 'relationship' and what constitutes 'cheating'. Rosie draws on her own experience and interviews with dozens of people, gay and straight, male and female....

Kieran's love life didn't get off to a good start. He threw up after his first kiss; he was beaten up by the first girl to have a crush on him; and after a mix-up with his first love letter, he could only sit back and watch as the entire school mistook him for a brutal murderer. By the time the hormones kicked in, Kieran had all but given up on love, but the worst was yet to come.

Millions of people have, at some point in their lives, waited tables. Some did it only in college or got out by sheer determination, good luck...or suicide. Others took it on as permanent employment. And many remain haunted by nightmare scenarios where they are the sole servers in restaurants packed with complaining patrons. For all those disenchanted current and former food service employees, Darron Cardosa has your back.

The Battle of Brandsveid brought together every king and nobleman in the land in an epic struggle for the future of the Land of Dis, as the armies of the Six Kingdoms united against the monstrous army of Lord Brand. It was the event Vergil, a knight in the service of the Order of Avaress, had waited for his entire life. Unfortunately, he slept through it.

Set a thousand years (give or take) before the events of Disenchanted, Distopia tells the story of Wyngalf the Bold, the legendary hero renowned for ridding the land of Dis of the scourge of dragons. The story begins as Wyngalf, a young missionary for an obscure religious sect, arrives in the port city of Skuldred. Desperate to prove his worth to his superiors, Wyngalf finds himself drafted into leading a missionary voyage across the sea to the semilegendary land of Dis.

From when I learned I don't have a sex-phone operator voice to when I fainted in the middle of a shoot. From when I bombed a movie audition to when I was upstaged by the modeling equivalent of a soccer mom. It's all here. So sit back, relax, and listen to a few stories that will remind you that modeling is about as glamorous as babysitting a bunch of toddlers. Toddlers on a sugar rush. By the way, your keys are underneath your jacket in the kitchen.

The story of Billy, whose Grandmother left him the "voodoo handbag" in her will, after he had sold her soul to science. The tales it told Billy would change his life for ever - and the lives of other people too.

The Jehovahs have always been a tight-knit family and one of the biggest names in universal property development. The driving force behind them is the old boy, God, although in recent millennia he has ceased to play an active role and has become something of a recluse. Now tragedy has struck the House of Jehovah.

Chris Gethard has often found himself in awkward situations most people, including you, probably would have safely avoided. The good news is now, thanks to this book, you can enjoy the painfully funny consequences of his unfortunate decisions at a safe distance. A Bad Idea I'm About to Do invites listeners to join Chris as he navigates an adolescence and adulthood mired in hilariously ill-fated nerdom, and to take comfort in the fact that - as his experiences often prove - things could always be much, much worse.

What does it mean to grow up with pink bits between your legs? Writer Kat George takes you on a journey of self-discovery from the moment you're pushed out of a vagina, to the moment you realize you have one, and the ongoing struggle of figuring out what it all means. From her first period, to sex in a hostel cloakroom, to fully lucid cervical biopsies, Kat's charming, sometimes painful yet hilarious stories of feminine exploration will have you giggling, squirming, and hopefully feeling a little bit less alone when you're face-to-face with your own sexuality.

Laney has just finished graduate school in California and sees her cross-country drive as the perfect chance to reflect on the past before facing her future back East. With 3,000 miles ahead of her and a box of mix tapes as her only companion, she envisions a trip spent reminiscing; whether it's her first camp kisses, high school parties and crushes, or college loves and losses, Laney's most treasured memories - good and bad - are all just a song away.

Evan had a hit single, but that was 10 years ago. Thirty-one now, hes drifting, playing in a local band and teaching middle-aged men to coax music from an electric guitar. Now, 14 years later, he experiences unplanned parenthood when he undertakes to raise the resentful teenage son hes never known. Off beat and disarming, How Evan Broke His Head and Other Secrets portrays a contemporary American family with unfailing honesty.

Laura Meredith never imagined herself appearing on TV - she’s too old, too flabby, too downright hormonal, and much too busy holding things together for her son, Stanley, after her husband left her for a younger, thinner replacement. But best friend Charlotte is a determined woman and when Laura is persuaded on to a daytime show to talk about her PMT, everything changes. Suddenly there’s a camera crew tracking her every move and Laura finds herself an unlikely star. But as things heat up between her and gorgeous TV director, Cal, they’re going downhill elsewhere.