Showing results for "water,-water" in Humorous

When Toot Hansell’s water supply turns murky, it's easy to blame the notoriously soggy Yorkshire weather. But this winter, the rain's endless, the water's undrinkable, and the village is slowly turning into a marsh. The local water sprite, Nellie, could probably sort it all out—if she hadn't mysteriously vanished, leaving behind a battalion of furious geese, which are only adding to the problems. Now the only clean water in town is arriving in pricey bottles from Toot Hansell's new wellness guru, Lachlan Jameson. But the rising water isn't the only problem. People are disappearing.

Fred the Mermaid has taken the bait and chosen to date Artur, Prince of the Black Sea, over human marine biologist Thomas. And just in time. The existence of the Undersea Folk is no longer a secret, and someone needs to keep them from floundering in the media spotlight. Fred has all the right skills for that job, but has a hard time when her real father surfaces and tries to overthrow Artur's regime.

Logan Morrison always fought for everything he had, but it never was much. Growing up truly alone did that to you. One day, when taking on an extra tutoring gig to help out a cute chick with a quirky name, she ends up bringing him back to her place. Cool, right? Well, the next morning, Logan wakes up in chains and comes to learn that Cherry Cola is one beautiful and unhinged monster girl member out of three in a small Fresco City witch coven. Their plans for him? Servitude.

As far as rock star Gareth Kendrick, the last true bard in Faerie, is concerned, the only good Unseelie is...well...there’s no such thing. Two centuries ago, an Unseelie lord abducted Gareth’s human lover Niall, and Gareth has neither forgotten nor forgiven. Niall O’Tierney, half-human son of the Unseelie King, had never lost a wager until the day he swore to rid the Seelie court of its bard.

Have you ever come across those stories with heroes who knew just how to get things done? The ones who were masters in five different martial arts, and knew ten ways to skin a bear after killing it with their bare hands? Yeah, that wasn’t me. Hell, I had trouble asking a girl out on a date. But someone in clerical must have made an error. Because I got ripped from an airplane on my way home after my last day in the Coast Guard. I mean, come on, I wasn’t even in one of the hardcore branches of the military or anything!

As a C-Tier Lifeblade, Ethan keeps his head down, works hard, and always hits his mark. His skills might not be flashy, but they get the job done—and in SlayerCorp's cutthroat portal acquisitions industry, reliability makes you valuable. He’s built a solid rep as the go-to healer who can hold his own in any situation, with a resume that's earned him the respect and admiration of his peers. But Ethan's biggest challenge isn’t in the dungeons he clears or the creatures he fights. It’s Lily Chen.

The Coven King prophecy is a sure thing, and every witch in Fresco City knows it by now. What's more, even the coastal super covens are growing aware. They're not happy. Yet. Give them time to warm up to him, though.

Isekaied into a level 86 Necromancer-King's body, I leave his life of war behind in favor of peace in the idyllic Borderlands. Upon meeting the elven maiden Narya Summerdew and a razor-toothed half-elven child, the three of us form an unlikely improvised family in the hopes of remaining anonymous. As we embrace the eccentric community of Gelderham, we find happiness in simplicity…But my past casts shadows on our growing bonds. How will Narya react when she learns her new husband was once the evil king set on destroying her people?

Dave Smith is having a bad day, week, month, maybe even year. Freshly unemployed, facing eviction, and now he's been transported to a fantasy world. A wish come true for many a geek, if only he hadn't died less than a day after he arrived. Now trapped in this fantasy realms version of purgatory, he faces the prospect of trying to navigate a new existence as a dungeon. That wouldn't be so bad, except ending dungeons seems to be the path out for many of the other denizens of these Proving Grounds.

When a trio of cute goblins emerged from a silver portal that appeared out of nowhere on my property...things got a bit more complicated all of a sudden. Also, I soon discovered they bite and scratch: mostly each other, but sometimes me.

It turns out it's hard to write a blurb for book 3 without spoiling what happened in your unreleased book 2. Rest assured, the conclusion will be exciting to say the least, with new characters, lore, and plenty of action of all kinds. Every plot thread will be tied up in a neat little bow, and the details on the page will surely satisfy men of culture.

With the portal to Elyndor a constant nagging worry in the back of Daryl's mind, as well as the fallout of his confrontation with Boulder looming over his head, life isn't as cozy as it could be. Thankfully, he has Koko, Poppi, Moppi, Katanica, and Susie to help him relieve some stress. But in volume two, the plot thickens, the lore deepens, and Daryl's world opens up to an adventure and a power struggle he never expected. Action, romance, magic, danger, and lots of greenskinned women—everything a man wants in a story...You'll find it all here.

With old allies and enemies clamoring to meet and negotiate with the new "Bright Lord of Gelderham", the world of Etherion seems destined to return to a new age of stability at last. Closer to home, now that Kaya has joined the family, the dynamic in the Stillwater household has changed forever. Children grow older, and the community grows closer. Gelderham always prospers, but uncertainties linger in spite of all this happiness. Several mysteries still loom over the heads of Gray and his family, in particular.

All stories come to an end, and thankfully this one is very cozy. In the final installment of Dark Lord of the Farmstead, find out what becomes of the Stillwater family. Mild spoilers: it's wholesome.

Daxas has survived his first few weeks as a Dungeon. He has successfully discovered several exploits in the system and has been thriving. He is advancing to the second rank, fought off an invasion of orcs and goblins, and, most importantly, now has a lovely wood elf companion named Jessamyn. However, success brings new challenges and new, more powerful challengers. It's time for the Wolf King to expand his dungeon, cut down any who dare oppose him, and add to his harem of mates. Meanwhile, the Divine Lords are plotting in the background, trying to engineer his downfall.

Daxas has reached rank eight. He has conquered and subsumed a second dungeon increasing his power and pulled one over the Divine Lords in the process. However, he is aware this will bring new difficulties to his door and the Divine Lords are unlikely to take their humiliation well.

Daxas' trials continue. He has defeated those with the temerity to face him and claimed the dark elf Dungeon Mistress Jen'Zadeer Shadestar for his own. His guild, the Dark Moon Rising, continues to flourish despite its figurehead Chief Simeon Reedwhistle's reservations.

Jezebel and the elf guilds have been defeated. The elven goddess now resides in the Wolf King's lair, along with Daxas and the others. However, her attempts to destroy Daxas' dungeon and steal all the soul energy he had collected over time has not been without consequence.

When the dice are loaded, the claws come out. Rudy and Thomas have landed in Sin City, but not on all four paws. The Talking Animal Union is determined to trip up the Freelance Familiars and entangle Thomas in a game where Death holds all the cards. But Thomas can’t focus merely on saving himself. A vampire stalks the refugees of Grantsville, and to save his friends - and his own neck - Thomas has to put more than just himself on the line. The odds are raw and bloody in Vegas.

Irdessa the Undying, a renowned arena fighter in Fohrvylda, has escaped imprisonment but at great cost. Broken and alone, she must outwit and outfight her pursuers. Basalt Kale, a failed Consonant monk of the lowest order, embarks on a quest to improve Ausgan but discovers vile secrets of his order that he cannot abide. The heathens of Fohrvylda amass ships and beasts of war to sail the Faithless Sea and assault the monks of Ausgan, who will greet the steel-bearing invaders with elemental destruction.