Episode Description

Last week's episode sparked a lot of conversation online. I posted a clip about eating disorder recovery in the ozempic era and the comments absolutely exploded — and it got me thinking about something I've been wanting to talk about for a while.

The thoughts I had in my eating disorder that I'm not proud of. The ones that would probably get me canceled if I posted them without context. The ones that felt so real at the time and are so clearly the disorder talking when I look back now.

In this episode I'm unpacking each of those thoughts, where they actually came from, and what they say about the disorder — not about who I am or who you are. If you've had thoughts in your eating disorder that have made you feel like a bad person, this episode is directly for you.

In This Episode:

• Why I posted about my ugliest ED thoughts on Instagram — and why the response floored me
• The core reframe: eating disorders are not personality traits
• How eating disorders distort your value system to make harmful behaviors feel moral and right
• Each of the ugly thoughts I had — unpacked honestly and without shame
• Feeling superior when eating less than others at the table — and what was really going on
• Feeling threatened when someone else's body changed — and the identity piece underneath it
• Believing hunger meant I was doing something right — and what that was really about
• Believing my body said something about my character — and the identity crisis driving it
• Thinking my therapist and dietician were jealous of me — and why the eating disorder needs you to believe that
• Not wanting a normal body — and why "just eat normally" was never going to land
• Thinking enjoying food made me weak — and the fear underneath it
• The darkest thought — and why it was depression talking, not who I was
• Why your eating disorder thoughts are not your identity — and what they actually are

Timestamps:

0:00 Intro 1:00 What happened when I posted about the ozempic episode — and what it inspired 4:00 The core frame: eating disorders are not personality traits 6:00 How eating disorders distort your value system 8:00 Ugly thought #1: feeling superior when eating less than others 13:00 What self-control actually is — and what the eating disorder gets wrong about it 14:00 Ugly thought #2: feeling threatened when someone else's body changed 17:00 The identity and scarcity piece underneath that thought 18:00 Ugly thought #3: believing hunger meant I was doing something right 21:00 Interoception — and how the eating disorder distorts your body's cues 22:00 Ugly thought #4: believing my body said something about my character 26:00 Not knowing who I was — and trying to manufacture identity through my body 28:00 Ugly thought #5: thinking my therapist and dietician were jealous of me 30:00 Why the eating disorder needs you to believe everyone trying to help has an ulterior motive 32:00 Ugly thought #6: not wanting a normal body 35:00 Why "just eat normally" was never going to be comforting 37:00 Ugly thought #7: thinking enjoying food made me weak 40:00 Ugly thought #8: believing body change would be worse than not existing 43:00 Why that thought is depression — not character 45:00 You are not your eating disorder thoughts 47:00 Closing thoughts

Quotes from This Episode:

"The thing about self-control is you

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
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One of the most common questions I get — from clients, from my own lived experience, from people who have spent years wondering — is this: why me? Why did I get an eating disorder when the people around me didn't?

In this episode I'm getting into the real answer. Not the oversimplified version. The actual, nuanced, deeply personal answer — using my own story, my clinical experience, and the framework I use with clients in my group program The Quasi-Recovery Exit to help people understand themselves in a way that actually moves the needle in recovery.

This one is a thinker. I hope it gives you some real clarity.

This Episode Is Brought to You By Cozy Earth

Cozy Earth makes the softest, most comfortable pajamas and bedding I’ve foung — and comfort in my body is something I don't compromise on anymore. Visit CozyEarth.com and use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off.

In This Episode:

• Why I grew up with two sisters, in the same family, doing the same activities — and I'm the only one who got an eating disorder
• The genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger framework — and what it actually means for understanding your own story
• The specific temperament traits I was born with that made me vulnerable to an eating disorder
• How my performing arts high school became the environmental trigger that intensified those traits
• Why understanding what caused your eating disorder is actually one of the most powerful things you can do in recovery
• The identity conversation — how the traits your eating disorder co-opted are actually your greatest strengths
• Why you won't lose yourself when you recover — you'll finally find yourself
• How narrative therapy helps you make meaning of your story without shame
• What to do with the traits you don't want to give up in recovery
• A reframe for the question "what's wrong with me?" — and what to ask instead

Timestamps:

0:00 Intro + new desk setup 2:00 Life update — pregnancy announcement followup, son's hospital stay, Disneyland plans 4:00 A note on binge urges and what they're actually telling you 6:00 Today's topic: what actually causes an eating disorder? 7:00 Growing up with two sisters — same family, same upbringing, only I got an eating disorder 10:00 Genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger 12:00 The temperament traits I was born with — drive, perfectionism, sensory sensitivity 16:00 Early signs of genetic predisposition — body awareness from a very young age 18:00 How performing arts high school became the environmental trigger 22:00 Competition, comparison, and the perfect storm that created my eating disorder 24:00 How to understand your own story through this lens 26:00 The identity conversation — temperament vs conditioning 28:00 Your eating disorder traits are actually your superpowers 30:00 Narrative therapy and making meaning of your story 32:00 What to ask yourself instead of "what's wrong with me?" 35:00 How to channel your traits toward recovery and growth 37:00 Closing thoughts

Practical Reflection Questions From This Episode:

• What traits do I have that might have made me vulnerable to an eating disorder?
• What life circumstances intensified those traits or made the eating disorder necessary?
• What do I actually like about those traits — and do I want to keep them in recovery?

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!

Episode Description

First things first — I have some news. Big news. News that explains a lot of the cryptic, tired, off-kilter energy you've been picking up on these last few weeks.

I'm pregnant. Baby number two is on the way and she is a girl.

But after that announcement, we're getting into something I've been genuinely fired up about — because right now, in 2026, I believe this is one of the hardest moments in recent history to be in eating disorder recovery. The cultural noise around weight loss is louder than I have ever heard it. And I wanted to talk honestly about what that's like, what it stirs up, and how to actually stay the course when it feels like the whole world is doing the opposite.

In This Episode:

• The big announcement — baby number two, and what being pregnant with a girl brings up for me as someone in ED recovery
• Why I believe right now is one of the hardest moments in history to be actively recovering from an eating disorder
• The cultural conversation around weight loss in 2026 — and why it feels so different from anything we've seen before
• The comparison to the nineties and early two thousands thin ideal — and why this moment feels even harder
• A client story about recovering while her parents were actively dieting — and what that taught me about staying the course when everyone around you is going a different direction
• Why choosing to eat adequately right now is genuinely a countercultural act
• The psychology behind why people without eating disorders get pulled into these cycles — and why understanding that actually helps
• Why GLP-1s and weight loss medications are a different conversation for people with eating disorder histories
• How to use a little healthy rebellion to protect your recovery
• Practical strategies for navigating social media, diet culture talk, and the cultural moment we're in

Timestamps:

0:00 Intro 1:00 Reflecting on last week's body image episode 2:00 The big announcement — I'm pregnant 5:00 Having a girl — and what that brings up around passing on an eating disorder 7:00 Why right now is one of the hardest times in history to be in ED recovery 9:00 The cultural noise around weight loss in 2026 10:30 Comparing this moment to the nineties thin ideal 12:00 How we got here — and why it feels different this time 13:30 Choosing to eat adequately as a countercultural act 15:00 A client story: recovering while her parents were actively dieting 20:00 Putting yourself in the driver's seat of your own values 22:00 The psychology of why people without EDs fall into these cycles 24:00 Why GLP-1s are a different conversation for people in recovery 27:00 It's okay to feel frustrated that other people seem to have an easy solution 29:00 Practical strategies: resetting your algorithm, limiting social media 32:00 Clarifying your values around why nourishment matters to you 33:30 The internal scoff — giving yourself permission to know better 34:30 Finding your people and filling your feed with counterculture 35:30 Telling yourself you can wait it out 37:00 Closing thoughts — eat your food. you know better.

Practical Strategies Mentioned:

• Limit or take breaks from social media — especially during high-exposure seasons like spring and summer
• Reset your algorithm intentionally — spend time actively liking content that feels safe and muting or reporting what does

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!

Honest confession: my body image has been pretty rough lately. And yes, I know — I'm a recovered eating disorder therapist who just last week talked about how quiet my ED voice has gotten. So what gives?

In this episode I'm getting real about what bad body image actually looks like for me now, 11 years into recovery. How it's different from the eating disorder voice. What body dysmorphia really feels like from the inside. And the specific things that actually help me move through it — not the textbook DBT stuff, just what genuinely works for me right now.

This one is honest, a little messy, and I think a lot of you are going to relate.

This Episode Is Brought to You By Cozy Earth

Bad body image weeks call for a soft place to land at the end of the day. Cozy Earth makes the softest, most comfortable pajamas and the absolute coziest bedding — and comfort is something I don't compromise on anymore. Visit CozyEarth.com and use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off.

In This Episode:

• Why you can have a quiet ED voice and still have terrible body image — and how those are actually different things
• What body dysmorphia really is and how it shows up as a sensory experience, not just negative thoughts
• Why bad body image days are often a signal that something else is off in your life
• The wardrobe disaster phenomenon and what it actually has to do with body image
• Why body neutrality is more accessible than body positivity — and what it actually looks like in practice
• What I do instead of white-knuckling through a bad body image week
• Why clothing and personal style have genuinely been a game changer for my body image
• Somatic tools that help when you want to completely dissociate from your body
• How to talk about body image struggles in a way that actually helps you process them
• Why showing your body care — even when you don't love it — is what actually heals the relationship

Timestamps:

0:00 Intro 1:00 Life update — a weird season, turning 31, and learning to meet my own needs 5:30 This week's topic: my body image has been rough lately 6:00 How body image and the ED voice are actually different things 8:30 What body dysmorphia really feels like from the inside 12:00 The wardrobe disaster and what it signals 15:00 The sensory experience of body dysmorphia 18:30 Social media, idealized bodies, and wanting to dissociate 20:30 Body neutrality vs body positivity — and why neutrality is more accessible 23:00 Riding the wave vs actually doing something about it 25:30 Feelings change — they always have a beginning, middle, and end 26:30 What actually helps me: clothes, comfort, and personal style 29:30 Nuuly subscription — and why it's been a game changer especially for variable sizing in recovery 33:00 Zooming out: bad body image as a signal, not a fact 35:30 Somatic tools for when you want to crawl out of your skin 38:30 Orienting exercise — how to arrive back in your body 39:30 Body patting and butterfly taps 40:30 Talking about it — but in a specific way 43:00 Showing your body care even when you don't love it 45:00 Closing thoughts

Practical Tools Mentioned:

• Zoom out: when body image is off, look at what else is going on in your life — it's usually a signal, not the whole story
• Orienting exercise: find the farthest point you can see, then the closest, then no

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!

Episode Description

One of the most common questions I get — from clients, from Instagram, from people deep in the trenches of recovery — is this: does the eating disorder voice ever actually go away?

In this episode, I get honest about my own experience with the ED voice: what it sounded like at its worst, how it shifted through different stages of recovery, and where it lives now (spoiler: it's a lot more like an intrusive thought about tap dancing in a grocery store than a voice running my life).

This isn't a tidy yes-or-no answer, because recovery isn't tidy. But it is a real one — and one I don't think the internet talks about honestly enough.

In This Episode:

• What the eating disorder voice actually is — and why it can feel like a separate voice in your head (and no, that doesn't mean you're "crazy")
• The difference between ego syntonic and ego dystonic thinking, and why that shift matters in recovery
• My personal experience with the ED voice from its loudest point to where it lives now
• Why the voice often gets louder when you start recovering — and what that actually means
• The beach ball analogy: why trying to "shut up" the ED voice often backfires
• What actually moves the needle: building your own voice, not silencing theirs
• The near-relapse I've talked about before — and why it happened even without a constantly active voice
• Why "if I can't fully recover, why even try?" is one of the most dangerous traps in recovery
• Practical tools for when the voice feels all-consuming

Timestamps:

0:44 Intro & life update 3:22 Episode topic intro: the eating disorder voice question 7:19 What is the "eating disorder voice"? 10:56 Who asks this & why 13:39 My personal experience: the voice at its worst 14:38 Do I still have disordered thoughts? My honest answer 20:42 How I got to where I am today 28:06 The beach ball metaphor: giving the voice less space 32:24 My answer: yes and no 36:54 Practical tips if the voice is all-consuming 40:03 Outro

Practical Tools Mentioned:

• Name the voice: learn to label thoughts as "eating disorder thoughts" without immediately fighting them
• Hear it, don't obey it: practice acknowledging the ED voice and giving yourself permission to have a different opinion — even if you don't know what that is yet
• Identify the feeling underneath: fear, panic, sadness — and ask what you need that isn't an eating disorder behavior
• The "noise" technique: when all else fails, just say it out loud — noise, noise, noise

Quotes from This Episode:

"The goal maybe isn't to stop having an eating disorder voice entirely. Maybe the goal is to stop having it rule your life."

"It stopped being just about the eating disorder. I started writing more about meeting new people and discovering new parts of me."

"Even if your life can be 50% better than it is right now — that is so worth it compared to the 100% hell that is living with an eating disorder."

Keywords/Tags: eating disorder recovery, eating disorder voice, ED voice, does the eating disorder voice go away, quasi-recovery, restrictive eating disorder, disordered eating, food guilt, recovery mindset, anorexia recovery, bulimia recovery, Recovered-ish podcast, Chloe Cox, recovered-ish, eating disorder therapist, eating di

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!

hello, lovely friends. welcome back to recovered-ish.

today we’re talking about the part of recovery that i think catches a lot of people off guard:

how long it takes.
how messy it is.
and how discouraging it can feel when you’re doing “everything right” and still not feeling better yet.

because i think a lot of people go into recovery expecting it to feel hard for a little while… and then eventually click into place.

and when that doesn’t happen, it’s really easy to spiral into:
is this even working?
why is this still so hard?
am i doing recovery wrong?

this episode is the reality check i think a lot of people need.

in this episode, i talk about:

• why recovery often feels worse before it feels better
• the part of healing nobody really prepares you for
• why treatment is a beginning, not a magic fix
• how eating disorders create false safety
• why discomfort doesn’t mean you’re failing
• what actually keeps people going when recovery feels long and exhausting
• why you’re not behind just because it’s taking time

i also talk about the difference between wanting recovery and actually staying in it long enough for your brain and body to catch up.

if you’ve ever thought, “i’m trying so hard… why does this still feel awful?” this one is for you.

sponsor

today’s episode is sponsored by Cozy Earth — truly one of my favorite brands i’ve gotten to partner with.

if you want to romanticize your life a little and make your bed / pajamas / nervous system feel better, i highly recommend.

use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off
👉 www.cozyearth.com

support beyond the podcast

💛 Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recovery
use code PODCAST for $57 off
👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/

follow along on instagram:
@recoverwithchloe

don’t forget to eat your food.

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!

hi! welcome back to recovered-ish.

today we’re talking about food guilt.
but not in the surface-level way it’s usually talked about.

because this isn’t just
“i feel a little guilty.”

this is the kind of guilt that hits after you eat and makes you feel like you need to fix it. immediately.

the kind that lingers.
the kind that turns into
“i shouldn’t have done that” → “i am bad.”

and if you’ve ever been stuck in that loop of
eat → feel awful → compensate → feel safe → repeat
this episode is going to make a lot of things click.

⚠️ content note
this episode discusses eating disorder thoughts, food guilt, and compensatory urges.
no numbers or graphic details.

in this episode, i talk about:

• why food guilt feels so intense
• the difference between guilt and shame (and why it matters)
• how guilt reinforces the eating disorder cycle
• why your body reacts like it’s in danger after eating
• where “good vs bad” food beliefs actually come from
• the problem with “clean eating” and food rules
• why this isn’t really about willpower
• why thinking differently isn’t enough on its own
• how to stop trying to “fix” the food
• what to actually do after you eat when the guilt hits
• real ways to regulate your body instead of compensating

resources / sponsor

sponsor

this episode is sponsored by Cozy Earth.

you guys know i’m really intentional about what i share here, and i would never partner with a brand that didn’t actually align.

cozy earth makes some of the softest, most comfortable loungewear and bedding i’ve ever owned. like genuinely the kind of stuff that makes you feel a little more taken care of in your day to day.

if you want to check them out, you can use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off.

www.cozyearth.com

Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recovery

get $57 off with code PODCAST
👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/

follow me on instagram:
instagram.com/recoverwithchloe
@recoverwithchloe

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!

hello, lovely friends. welcome back to recovered-ish.

today’s episode is a little different.

i was feeling kind of chaotic, kind of scattered, and i knew i did not have it in me to do justice to one of the bigger, heavier topics i had planned. so instead, i did something i honestly never thought i would do.

i pulled out my old journals.

the actual journals i kept from the depths of my eating disorder through therapy, residential treatment, php, iop, and early recovery. five full books of wild thoughts, assignments, fears, honesty, and things i didn’t even want to say out loud at the time.

so in this episode, i’m reading them with you.

in this episode, i talk about:
– the lies my eating disorder told me
– the illusion of control it promised
– what the eating disorder was giving me at the time
– what it was quietly taking away
– identity loss in recovery
– why anger can be such a powerful emotion in healing
– recovery assignments that actually helped
– the moment i started imagining a future in a different body
– what it looked like to slowly find myself again

there are definitely moments in this episode that are funny. there are also moments that really got me.

more than anything, i hope it makes you feel less alone.

because if you’ve ever felt like your thoughts were too weird, too dark, too obsessive, too much for anyone else to understand, i promise you are not the only one.

support beyond the podcast
if you want more structure and support in your recovery, Recovery Skills Training is my step by step program that helps you build real momentum with food, body image, coping, identity, and recovery skills that actually stick.

use code PODCAST for $57 off
👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/

follow along on instagram:
@recoverwithchloe

don’t forget to eat your food.

Resources + Connect with Me:

• Instagram: @recoverwithchloe
• Recovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts
• Subscribe on YouTube!