Why Love Isn’t Enough: How to Truly Protect Your Relationship with Stan Tatkin
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Why Love Isn’t Enough: How to Truly Protect Your Relationship with Stan Tatkin
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About this listen
View Show Notes & Blog Page for This Episode
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In this episode of The Emotional Longevity Podcast, Dr. Elisha Goldstein sits down with world-renowned couples therapist and author Dr. Stan Tatkin, creator of the PACT model and author of Wired for Love and In Each Other’s Care.
Stan reveals how our nervous systems are built for co-regulation, not independence, and why traditional ideas of “self-care” in relationships often fail. Instead, couples need a shared purpose, secure agreements, and a willingness to prioritize the relationship—especially under stress.
If you’ve ever felt stuck in recurring arguments, emotional distance, or frustration around connection—this conversation is a game-changer.
In this episode, we cover:
Why love isn’t enough for long-term connection
The neurobiology of attachment and co-regulation
What makes relationships spiral into self-protection
Why “secure functioning” couples thrive—and how to become one
The exact moment we lose empathy (and how to get it back)
How to prepare for conflict before it happens
The one agreement every couple needs
Why individual healing alone won’t save your relationship
If your relationship matters to you—listen to this twice.
Take notes. Reflect. And start shifting from “me vs. you” to us vs. the problem.
Connect with Stan Tatkin:
- Website & Trainings
- Books:
- Wired for Love (2nd Edition)
- In Each Other’s Care
Connect with Elisha:
Subscribe to Emotional Longevity:
- Apple Podcasts
- Spotify
- YouTube
Produced by Peoples Media
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