In this episode, we’re naming the emotions many widows feel during the holidays but rarely say out loud.
Jealousy. Guilt. Anger. Longing. Mixed emotions that feel contradictory and confusing.
And the shame that often follows.

I also answer listener questions submitted this week—questions so many of you are wrestling with as the season approaches.

If the holidays bring up complicated emotions for you, you’re not alone and you're not doing anything wrong. This episode will meet you right where you are.

What We Talk About in This Episode

• Why the holidays amplify heavy emotions in grief

A look at how cultural pressure to “be joyful” clashes with the reality of living in the after.

• Why jealousy and envy show up (and what they’re really pointing to)

Spoiler: It’s not about wanting someone else’s life. It’s about missing your own before-loss life.

• The guilt of not feeling festive

How guilt is tied to expectations—not failure—and why your nervous system is actually protecting you.

• Anger, frustration, and emotional sensitivity

Understanding anger as a secondary emotion and what it’s trying to tell you.

• Regret, longing, and navigating traditions that feel impossible this year

Why familiar rituals can intensify grief, and how to give yourself permission to pause, shift, or create new ones.

• Mixed emotions: joy + sadness existing together

How to honor the duality of grief without questioning your love or loyalty to your person.

Key Takeaways

• Every emotion you feel is valid. None of it makes you ungrateful or unloving.
• Duality is normal in grief. You can feel joy and heartbreak in the same breath.
• Awareness is calming. Naming an emotion helps regulate your nervous system.
• Your reactions are biological, not personal failures.
• Presence matters more than perfection. You don’t have to force holiday spirit.

Quotes From the Episode

Connect With Me

If this episode resonated with you, I would love to stay connected.
You don’t have to navigate grief alone.

• Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends
Where I share grief support, tools, and real conversations about widowhood.

• Website: laurenlentz.com
Learn more about my 1:1 coaching, group program Re-Imagine, and upcoming retreats.

• Work With Me:
If you’re ready for deeper support—whether through private coaching or group connection—you can explore current openings and offerings on my website.

I’m here walking this with you. Always.

Short, gentle guidance for a season that can feel overwhelming.

Episode Summary

The holidays can bring a complicated mix of emotions. In this episode, we explore five compassionate, doable ways to care for yourself through a season that often feels heavy and demanding.

This episode is intentionally simple and grounding. No pressure. No perfection. Just tools to help you meet yourself gently, wherever you are in your grief.

1. Why Self-Support Matters During the Holidays

• The “oxygen mask first” metaphor and what it really means in grief.
• How tending to your own needs preserves your emotional capacity.
• Simple examples of self-care that don’t require energy you don’t have.

1. Set Boundaries

• How to get clear about what you can and can’t engage with.
• Plan A, B, and C as a gauge for your physical, emotional, and mental energy.
• Small, doable boundary examples you can use in real time.

2. Plan Mini Rituals for Comfort

• Why small, intentional acts can create moments of calm.
• Examples of rituals that honor your person and create space for love and memory.
• How rituals help grief and love coexist.

3. Ground Yourself in the Present

• Gentle mindfulness practices that don’t dismiss grief.
• Sensory moments (warm mug, candle, music, scent) that help interrupt overwhelm.
• Why grounding helps you reset and reconnect with yourself.

4. Keep Expectations Realistic

• Releasing the pressure for the holidays to look like they “used to.”
• Allowing joy to be small or infrequent—and allowing yourself not to feel festive at all.
• How realistic expectations reduce emotional strain.

5. Reach Out and Connect

• Finding the middle ground between total isolation and forced socializing.
• The power of brief, simple interactions with people who truly understand grief.
• Why connection doesn’t have to be big to be meaningful.

Use these to check in with yourself throughout the season:

• Which of the five practices feels most supportive for me this week?
• How can I honor my needs while engaging only in the moments that feel right?
• Is there a gentle reminder I can give myself when I start to feel overwhelmed?

Reflection doesn’t have to be formal—quiet thoughts, a note in your phone, or a few sentences in a journal all count.

If this episode supported you, I’d love to hear which practice resonated most.
You can connect with me on Instagram at @imsorrywerefriends or join my email community (www.laurenlentz.com) for grief support, tools, and upcoming offerings.

Episode 8: When the Holidays Bring Out Jealousy, Guilt, and Other Heavy Feelings
We’ll explore why these emotions arise and how to navigate them with compassion and honesty.

Today’s episode arrives on Thanksgiving — a day that can hold deep tenderness for anyone grieving the loss of a loved one. While others gather around the table in gratitude and celebration, you may be feeling the weight of who isn’t there. The empty seat — both literal and symbolic — can stir a mix of emotions: love, longing, sadness, and deep remembrance.

In this episode, we pause together to breathe, to anchor into presence, and to name what grief may be bringing up for you on a day like today. Lauren shares her own story of the first Thanksgiving after losing her husband, Kevin, and reflects on how holidays can hold both love and pain in the same breath.

You’ll also hear gentle, practical ways to carry your person’s memory into this day — from lighting a candle or sharing a story, to simply noticing the quiet ways they’re still with you. These small gestures remind us that grief and love coexist — always.

Whether you’re spending the day surrounded by others or in the quiet company of your own heart, may this episode remind you that you’re not alone, that your grief is sacred, and that love continues to live through you.

In this episode, we explore:
A grounding practice to help you anchor into the present moment
The physical, emotional, and spiritual ways grief might show up during the holidays
Simple, meaningful opportunities to honor your loved one through small rituals or acts of remembrance
Permission to do the day in whatever way feels right for you

Favorite Quote:

If today feels heavy, know this: You don’t have to do it all. Even one small act — lighting a candle, telling a story, or simply breathing — is enough to honor the love that still lives within you.

Resources & Links:
Connect with Lauren through social media: @imsorrywerefriends
Join the Re-Imagine spring waitlist or learn about 1:1 grief coaching: www.laurenlentz.com

Episode 5: The Grief Hangover

Description:
Have you ever made it through a milestone — a birthday, an anniversary, a holiday — feeling surprisingly okay, only to wake up the next day heavy, anxious, and undone? That’s what I call a “Grief Hangover.”

In this episode, I’m joined by my dear friend and fellow widow, Julia Warren — a grief coach and yoga therapist — to explore what happens after those emotionally charged days. Together, we talk about the physical, emotional, and spiritual impact of milestone moments, why the “day after” can feel so crushing, and how to care for yourself when that post-grief crash hits.

This conversation is an invitation to bring light to an experience so many of us share but rarely name. You’re not going backward. You’re not failing. You’re simply human — and your heart is doing its best to recover from something incredibly hard.

In this episode, we explore:

• What the “Grief Hangover” is and why it happens
• The emotional and physical crash that often follows milestone days
• Why feeling heavy after a “lighter day” doesn’t mean regression in healing
• Realistic ways to support yourself through the come-down
• How to communicate your needs to friends and family
• The importance of grace and gentleness in grief

Key Takeaways:

• A Grief Hangover isn’t a setback — it’s your body’s way of releasing emotional tension.
• You can honor the crash instead of judging it.
• Anticipating these days and planning small acts of care can soften their impact.
• Sharing your experience helps normalize what so many grievers silently carry.

Guest Spotlight:

Julia Warren
Grief Coach • Yoga Therapist • Widow
Julia supports grieving hearts through yoga therapy and holistic grief coaching. You can connect with her on Instagram at @juliawarrenyoga
or explore her programs and offerings through her website www.juliawarrenyoga.com

Connect & Resources:

• Follow along on Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends
  
  
• Learn more about 1:1 grief coaching, group grief support, and retreats: www.laurenlentz.com

Next Episode:
The Empty Seat at the Table — As Thanksgiving approaches, we’ll talk about how to honor what’s missing while still allowing ourselves to be present with what remains.

Episode 4: ’Tis the Season to Be Thankful (When You’re Not Feeling Very Thankful At All)

Holidays. For many, they’re filled with warmth, lights, and tradition — but for those of us navigating grief, they can feel heavy, complicated, and even isolating. In this episode, I explore why it’s okay if gratitude doesn’t show up this season — and how simply allowing yourself to feel, notice, and exist is enough.

What we cover in this episode:

• The tension between societal expectations of gratitude and your personal grief experience
• Why it can feel impossible to “be thankful” when your heart is still adjusting to life after loss
• Compassionate tools for sitting with your grief during the holidays
• How to notice the small, grounding moments that honor both your presence and your pain

I share personal reflections on my first holiday season without Kevin, from the little traditions that now hurt to the sharp contrast of seeing others celebrate. We also talk about the importance of making space for yourself — without forcing gratitude, without judgment, and without expectation.

Guided Practice:

• Find a quiet moment to notice your breath, your heartbeat, or your surroundings.
• Let yourself simply exist in the season, without trying to fix your feelings or push away your grief.
• Recognize that even small sparks of light — a song, a quiet walk, a warm drink — can hold gratitude without diminishing your grief.

Remember:
Grief doesn’t follow a calendar. It doesn’t need to be “fixed,” and it doesn’t cancel out gratitude — even if that gratitude is tiny or fleeting. The bravest thing you can do this season is to give yourself compassion and space to just be.

Next Episode:
We’ll explore “The Grief Hangover” — those days after milestones or holidays when grief feels heavier than the day itself. I’ll be joined by Julia Warren, fellow widow, grief coach, and yoga therapist, to discuss how to care for yourself during these emotional aftershocks.

Thank you for showing up for yourself today.
Grief is personal, tender, and ongoing, and your presence in this season — however it looks or feels — is an act of courage and self-compassion.

You can connect with me on Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends
and learn more about my grief coaching and programs at laurenlentz.com

Episode 3: Are My Best Days Behind Me?

In this week’s episode, Lauren explores a tender and deeply human question many widows quietly wrestle with after loss:
“Are my best days behind me?”

This episode dives into the complex layers of survivor’s guilt — the quiet ache that asks, “Why them and not me?” or “What right do I have to feel joy again?” — and offers gentle guidance for moving through that guilt with compassion and understanding.

Lauren shares the story of her first holiday season without Kevin and how she learned to hold both grief and joy at the same time — discovering that healing isn’t about “moving on,” but rather carrying love forward in new ways.

Through heartfelt reflection and practical tools, this episode reminds you that:

In This Episode

• What Survivor’s Guilt really is — and why naming it can be so freeing
• How guilt and fear can make joy feel like a betrayal
• The paradox of wanting to live again but fearing what that means
• Why healing isn’t the absence of pain, but the expansion of your capacity to hold both grief and love
• Gentle, practical tools for allowing small moments of light back into your life

Practical Invitations

1. Create small, intentional moments of presence — a cup of tea, a deep breath, a quiet moment outside.
2. Honor your emotions without judgment — both joy and sorrow have a place at the table.
3. Connect intentionally — reach out to someone who “gets it.”
4. Write reflectively — explore prompts like:
   • What’s a small moment of light I noticed today?
   • How did I feel alive, even for a moment, while grieving?
   • What does it feel like to carry my person with me while still experiencing joy?

Key Takeaway

You don’t move on from someone you love — you move forward with them, carrying their memory into each new moment.
Grief and joy are not opposites — they can coexist, side by side, shaping a new kind of beauty in the “after.”

Next Week

’Tis the Season to Be Thankful (When You’re Not Feeling Very Thankful At All)
We’ll explore how to navigate the holidays when gratitude feels impossible — and how to create small rituals of comfort and meaning during this challenging season.

Connect with Lauren

• Learn more about Lauren’s grief support work and programs at www.laurenlentz.com
• Follow along on Instagram at @imsorrywerefriends for grief reflections and gentle reminders
• Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes

Episode 2: My Story, My Why

Description:
In this deeply personal episode, I share the story that brought me here — the loss that changed everything, and the love and community that helped me survive it.

You’ll hear about the life I had before my husband Kevin’s death, the moment everything shifted, and the women who became my lifelines in the early days of grief. Through it all, you’ll learn why I felt called to create The Widow’s Collective — a space where grief is witnessed, honored, and held with compassion.

This episode isn’t about the details of loss — it’s about the heart of it. The ache, the connection, and the possibility of meaning after unimaginable change.

Please take care of yourself as you listen. If at any point it feels too heavy, pause or return when you’re ready. Your emotional safety matters most.

In this episode, we explore:

• The life “before” — and how one ordinary morning changed everything
• The day Kevin died, and the surreal moments that followed
• The sisterhood of widows who showed me how to breathe again
• The turning point that led me to grief coaching and creating this podcast
• My “why”: helping other widows feel seen, supported, and less alone

Key takeaways:

• You are not alone in your grief — connection is vital to healing.
• Grief and hope can coexist; it’s not one or the other.
• Healing isn’t about “moving on,” but learning to live fully with your loss.

Quote to hold onto:

Resources & Links:

• Follow along on Instagram: @imsorrywerefriends
  
  
• Learn more about grief coaching or retreats: laurenlentz.com

A gentle reminder:

Grief is not linear. Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and know that wherever you are today is enough.

Next Episode:
Are My Best Days Over? — We’ll explore what it means to live in the “after” and how to find glimmers of hope and meaning again.