Key Takeaways

• Healing past wounds is essential to avoid repeating toxic patterns.
• Your gut and nervous system often signal red flags before your mind does.
• Butterflies can mean dysregulation, while safety might initially feel “boring” but is actually healthy.
• Setting and flexing boundaries early reveals how someone respects (or disrespects) you.
• True love doesn’t complete you—it complements who you already are.

Resources & Support Mentioned

• Bitch is a Bad Word Podcast: Available on Apple, Spotify, and all major platforms
  
  Follow Lindsay Abernathy:
• Instagram: @bitchisabadwordpod
• Community Line: Call or text 331-BITCHES to connect or share your story

EPISODE LINKS

Dr. Amelia Kelley: About | Dr. Kelley's Books | Instagram

Key Takeaways

• Abusive relationships often follow the same predictable cycle—love bombing, devaluation, isolation, and intermittent reinforcement.
• Survivors often stay not because they want the relationship to end, but because they desperately hope the abuse will stop.
• Even small “repairs” (like a crumb of kindness) can keep survivors hooked, similar to a slot machine’s intermittent rewards.
• Children benefit profoundly when even one parent provides a safe, secure, and loving environment—even if only part-time.
• Leaving abuse allows survivors to rebuild their identities, reconnect with their support networks, and show their children what safety looks like.
• Abusers often store survivors’ vulnerabilities in a “vault,” later weaponizing them—this is not a reflection of your worth but of their manipulation.

Resources & Support Mentioned

• National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 800-799-7233
• If outside the U.S.: Search for your local domestic violence hotline. If you cannot find one, message Dr. Kelley via her website and she will help research for you.
• Bitch is a Bad Word Podcast: Available on Apple, Spotify, and all major platforms
  
  Follow Lindsay Abernathy:
• Instagram: @bitchisabadwordpod
• Community Line: Call or text 331-BITCHES to connect or share your story
  

EPISODE LINKS

Dr. Amelia Kelley: About | Dr. Kelley's Books | Instagram

Why does slowing down feel so uncomfortable for some of us? In this powerful episode, Dr. Amelia Kelley speaks with licensed psychotherapist and relational trauma recovery specialist Annie Wright about rest resistance, the anxiety, guilt, and discomfort that can arise when we try to pause.

Annie explains how early life experiences, relational trauma, and high-achieving personalities can wire us to equate rest with danger and productivity with safety. They explore how to tell the difference between healthy drive and a compulsion to keep going, and how cultural pressures can reinforce burnout. Annie also offers practical, compassionate tools for making rest feel safe again, starting small, reframing guilt, and learning to “go slow to go fast.”

Whether you’re a high achiever, a highly sensitive person, or someone who struggles to stop, this conversation offers the insight and strategies you need to create a sustainable, balanced life.

Key Takeaways:

• Rest can feel unsafe when trauma has linked achievement to love or safety.
• The key difference between drive and compulsion is having true choice in when to stop.
• Burnout often starts with self-doubt, apathy, and resentment toward what you once loved.
• High sensitivity and sensation seeking can complicate rest needs.
• Small, consistent rest practices help your nervous system adapt to stillness.
• Guilt over rest can be reduced by understanding where it began.
• Relationships can either support or undermine healthy rest.
• “Go slow to go fast” ensures long-term energy and passion.

Connect with Annie Wright:

Visit her website here
Follow her on Instagram

EPISODE LINKS

Dr. Amelia Kelley: About | Dr. Kelley's Books | Instagram