In this episode, Nicky Yazbeck sits down with Erica Bonham to explore polyvagal theory and the vital role of the vagus nerve in emotional regulation and mental health. Together, they break down the different states of the nervous system, how co-regulation supports healing, and practical tools that can calm and reset the body. The conversation touches on the impact of collective trauma, the power of mindfulness, and the importance of finding personal practices that truly resonate. Erica also shares accessible exercises for toning the vagus nerve and emphasizes that healing requires both addressing trauma and cultivating joy.

Erica Bonham, LPC, MA, is a Licensed Professional Counselor, certified yoga instructor, speaker, and trainer who blends counseling psychology with somatic and social justice perspectives. She has worked in diverse clinical and community settings, from outpatient mental health teams to teaching yoga in prisons and leading groups for survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Erica is committed to dismantling systems of oppression in her work and to helping people find safety, freedom, and connection. A proud mom of two, she draws inspiration from nature, family, and her belief that every person deserves a life of laughter, love, and gratitude.

Takeaways:

• Polyvagal theory explains our nervous system's response to stress.
• The vagus nerve plays a crucial role in emotional regulation.
• Understanding our nervous system can help us manage anxiety and stress.
• Techniques like the Butterfly Hug can aid in calming the nervous system.
• Co-regulation is essential for emotional healing and connection.
• Practicing mindfulness can enhance our awareness of our emotional states.
• Collective trauma affects our ability to connect with others.
• Simple exercises can help tone the vagus nerve and improve well-being.
• It's important to find personal techniques that resonate with you.
• Healing involves both addressing trauma and cultivating positive experiences.

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction to Polyvagal Theory

04:17 Understanding the Vagus Nerve

07:03 The Importance of Nervous System Regulation

09:55 Techniques for Calming the Nervous System

12:46 Exercises for Vagus Nerve Reset

14:47 The Role of Co-Regulation in Nervous System Health

17:41 Collective Nervous System and Community Support

20:36 Navigating Emotional Responses and Regulation

23:13 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

26:31 Navigating Relationships and Boundaries

27:31 The Butterfly Hug Technique

30:44 Grounding Techniques: 5-4-3-2-1

35:54 Physical Techniques for Regulation

40:40 The Importance of Twisting and Peripheral Awareness

41:56 Finding Your Own Medicine

46:49 The Balance of Internal and External Support

48:48 Embracing Both-and Thinking

49:59 Exploring the Depths of Healing

Connect with me:

https://nickyYyoga.com

https://www.youtube.com/@TheConnectedCommunity

nickynamaste@gmail.com

Connect with Erica:

https://www.avoscounseling.com/coaching-packages

https://www.avoscounseling.com/freebie

https://www.instagram.com/avoscounseling/

Keywords: polyvagal theory, vagus nerve, nervous system regulation, mental health, trauma, co-regulation, mindfulness, emotional well-being, self-care, healing techniques

In this episode of The Connected Community Podcast, Nicky Yazbeck is joined by Kate Evans, a psychologist and life and home decluttering coach, to explore the deeper emotional and psychological layers of decluttering. Together, they unpack why letting go of possessions can feel overwhelming and why clutter is rarely just about the physical items piling up.

Kate shares how decluttering is intimately tied to mental health, values, and personal history, highlighting the role of anxiety, depression, relationships, and even upbringing in shaping our attachment to things. She explains how sentimental value, the sunk cost fallacy, and the weight of family heirlooms often stand in the way of creating clear, intentional spaces. The conversation distinguishes between clutter and organization, emphasizing that true decluttering isn’t about perfect systems but about aligning one’s environment with one’s life and personality.

Kate also introduces her upcoming book, Ditch Your Sht: Decluttering Your Mindset to Declutter Your Home*, due out this October. Drawing from her own experiences, she encourages listeners to approach decluttering with compassion, understanding that they are not broken or failing if they struggle with it. Instead, the process is about acknowledging emotional barriers, facing fears, and creating sustainable systems that genuinely support well-being and joyful living

Takeaways

• Decluttering is not just about physical items; it's deeply emotional.
• Items can symbolize our beliefs and memories, making it hard to let go.
• The sunk cost fallacy can trap us into keeping unnecessary items.
• Finding sustainable ways to let go of items is crucial.
• Family heirlooms can carry emotional weight that complicates decluttering.
• Most adult children do not want the items their parents hold onto for them.
• Keeping multiples of items often stems from a fear of scarcity.
• Clutter and organization are not the same; true decluttering removes excess.
• The one in, one out rule helps maintain a clutter-free space.
• Awareness and intentionality are key to successful decluttering.

Chapters:

00:00 The Emotional Weight of Decluttering

04:01 Understanding Sentimental Attachments

06:47 The Sunk Cost Fallacy in Decluttering

09:44 Navigating Guilt and Responsibility

11:58 The Challenge of Family Heirlooms

14:32 Letting Go of Expectations for Future Generations

16:00 The Burden of Multiples and Unused Items

22:26 Decluttering Electronics and Boxes

23:34 The Dangers of Excess: Kitchen Tools and Gadgets

24:42 Mindset Around Scarcity and Abundance

26:36 Understanding Emotional Attachments to Items

28:19 Managing Linens and Towels Effectively

29:43 Clutter vs. Organization: The Tetris Master

32:09 One In, One Out: Maintaining Decluttered Spaces

35:27 The Motivation Behind Decluttering

39:52 Introducing 'Ditch Your Shit': A New Approach to Decluttering

Connect with me:

https://nickyYyoga.com

https://www.youtube.com/@TheConnectedCommunity

nickynamaste@gmail.com

Connect with Kate:

https://www.soulfulspacecoaching.com/

@katesevans.coaching

Keywords: decluttering, psychology, emotional attachments, sentimental value, sunk cost fallacy, family heirlooms, organization, clutter, mental health

In this episode of The Connected Community Podcast, Nicky Yazbeck talks with Lisa Fitzpatrick, a pelvic and sexual health educator and physiotherapist with more than 30 years in women’s health. Lisa is the founder of the Sexy Menopause movement and Womankind Pelvic Care. After becoming a mother in 2000, she focused her clinical work on pelvic floor health and later broadened it to include sexual well-being and midlife care. Her approach combines physiotherapy with yoga, mindfulness, meditation, and practical empowerment skills.

The conversation looks at what actually changes in perimenopause and menopause and how those shifts show up in daily life physically, emotionally, and in relationships. Lisa explains how pelvic floor function connects to continence, comfort with sex, and core stability, and how hormonal changes affect tissues, lubrication, desire, and mood. She and Nicky discuss the value of clear communication with partners and care providers, and why many women feel unseen or rushed in medical settings. Lisa offers straightforward steps for building support: learning basic pelvic floor awareness, using breath and gentle movement to regulate the nervous system, and making self-care a regular, realistic practice rather than a project.

Lisa also shares how mind–body tools can sit alongside evidence-informed physiotherapy. She describes simple ways to reduce shame and increase body confidence, including getting accurate information about estrogen and testosterone, tracking symptoms over time, and normalizing conversations about pleasure and pain. Throughout, she emphasizes that midlife is not a decline but a phase that can bring clarity about values, boundaries, and sexual expression when women have useful education and a supportive community.

Beyond her clinical work, Lisa has taught and presented nationally and internationally for two decades, creating anatomy manuals and wellness programs for yoga schools and workplaces, and contributing to pre- and postnatal, menopause, yin, and Iyengar curricula. She has given keynotes at Uplift Festival, International Women’s Day events, the Ausmumpreneur Conference, and The Artful Business Conference. She closes the episode with themes from her forthcoming book, Sexy Menopause (February 2026), which lays out a practical pathway for women to understand their bodies, reclaim sexuality and confidence, and make informed choices in midlife and beyond.

Takeaways:

• Menopause is often not discussed enough among women.
• Many women feel lonely during their menopausal journey.
• Physical changes during menopause can impact relationships.
• Estrogen withdrawal affects tissue resilience and libido.
• Foreplay is essential for comfort during intimacy.
• Communication with partners is crucial during this transition.
• Post-menopause can lead to a new beginning for many women.
• Self-care and lifestyle changes are vital during menopause.
• Therapeutic support can help address intimacy issues.
• Women can experience post-traumatic growth during this time.

Connect with me:

https://nickyYyoga.com

https://www.youtube.com/@TheConnectedCommunity

nickynamaste@gmail.com

Connect with Lisa:

https://www.lisafitzpatrick.com.au

https://www.sexymenopause.com

https://www.instagram.com/sexy.menopause

https://femininebodyspeaks.substack.com/

https://www.youtube.com/@thelisafitzpatrick

Keywords: menopause, perimenopause, sexual health, estrogen, progesterone, intimacy, self-care, weight gain, sleep issues, relationships, women's health, pelvic floor, pelvic health, midlife, intimacy, self-pleasure