RESOURCES www.leslievernick.com Suicide and crisis hotline: 988

• Challenges in Recognizing Unsafe Relationships

  • Dismissing Own Feelings and Needs
  • Fear of Confronting Truth About Relationship Dynamics

• Addressing Misguided Advice

  • Forgiveness and Forgetting
    • Importance of Remembering Past Actions for Setting Boundaries
    • Illustration: Story of the Songwriter Behind "Amazing Grace"
    • Understanding Need for Repentance and Growth
  • Maintenance vs. Repair Work in Relationships
    • Analogy: House Maintenance and Repair
    • Necessity of Addressing Trust and Safety Issues Before Other Issues
    • Recognizing Difference Between Maintenance Tasks and Repair Work

• Understanding Individual Capacity and Emotional Management

  • Importance of Self-Awareness in Managing Emotions
  • Recognizing Emotional Capacity and Limitations
  • Analogies: Understanding Emotional Capacity Through Everyday Examples

• Taking Ownership of Personal Growth

  • Individual Responsibility for Personal Development
  • Importance of Prioritizing Self-Care and Emotional Well-Being
  • Recognizing When Individual Work is Necessary Before Addressing Relationship Issues

• Seeking Help and Support

  • Encouragement to Seek Professional Guidance and Support
  • Highlighting Available Resources for Personal Growth and Relationship Support
  • Empowerment to Prioritize Personal Growth and Safety in Relationships

Setting Boundaries and Prioritizing Self-Care

1. Introduction to Boundaries

• Boundaries are essential for maintaining healthy relationships and self-respect.
• Understanding the importance of boundaries in various aspects of life.

2. Recognizing Boundary Violations

• Signs of boundary violations include feeling drained, disrespected, or overwhelmed.
• Identifying situations where boundaries are being crossed and acknowledging the need for change.

3. Establishing Boundaries

• The importance of clear communication when setting boundaries.
• Examples of effective boundary-setting phrases

4. Dealing with Criticism

• Addressing criticism that may arise when implementing boundaries.
• Seeking support from understanding individuals who respect your journey.

5. Respecting Yourself

• Embracing self-respect and understanding that boundaries are not selfish but necessary for personal growth.
• Recognizing and valuing your uniqueness and individual needs.

6. Knowing Yourself

• The importance of self-awareness in establishing and maintaining boundaries.
• Understanding your preferences, limitations, and values to make informed decisions.

RESOURCES: Find Joel Muddamalle's books and more at: www.muddamalle.com Find Leslie's books, programs, and more at: www.leslievernick.com Find Lysa Terkeurst and the Therapy and Theology podcast: www.lysaterkeurst.com/therapy-and-theology I. Introduction: Setting the Stage

• Acknowledging the complexity and sensitivity surrounding the issue of divorce and the Bible

II. Interpreting Malachi 2:16

• Analysis of the New King James Version's interpretation of Malachi 2:16
• Emphasis on the importance of understanding cultural context and nuances in translation
• Addressing misconceptions and criticism regarding biblical interpretation

III. Unpacking the Statement "God Hates Divorce"

• Clarification of the implications of a unilateral statement from God
• Discussion on the potential impact on individuals experiencing divorce
• Emphasis on the need for a nuanced understanding of biblical teachings

IV. Marriage, Divorce, and Biblical Context

• Examination of Exodus 21 and implications for marriage and divorce
• Discussion on the complexity of marital relationships and divine understanding
• Exploration of the New Testament teachings on divorce, particularly Jesus' response to the Pharisees

V. Understanding the Cultural and Historical Context

• Insights into the debate between the Hillel and Shammai camps regarding divorce
• Analysis of Jesus' response to the Pharisees and its cultural implications
• Consideration of Paul's teachings on divorce and remarriage

VI. Pastoral and Ethical Implications

• Reflection on the pastoral responsibilities in addressing divorce and marriage issues
• Advocacy for seeking specialized help and guidance in dealing with complex marital situations
• Emphasis on the importance of theological honesty and discernment in interpreting scripture

VII. Encouragement and Final Words

• Affirmation of God's love and care for individuals, particularly women
• Encouragement to uphold one's dignity and worth as children of God
• Call to discernment, prayer, and reliance on the Holy Spirit in understanding biblical truths.