I’m taking a 60-hour Peer Recovery Support training course which I’m super excited about. I was nervous about whether I could handle it physically, but the instructor reassured me he could accommodate my disability so that I don’t have to look at the screen. What I didn’t anticipate is the extreme cognitive fatigue as well. I constantly over-estimate my capabilities post-stroke.

I slept 11 hours the past two nights after class. It runs all day on Mondays and Tuesdays, and a half day on Fridays. I’ve been pushing myself to my edge. I finally turned my screen brightness down to zero yesterday afternoon for a fully black screen to best to manage the eye pain, headaches, nausea, and cognitive fatigue. It’s stretching me, but it’s also energizing me. I’ve learned far more about mental health and addiction than I expected in just the first two days. It’s giving me deeper insight into how to support others more thoughtfully and compassionately.

Because the course is so demanding, I’m recording fewer podcast episodes over the next few weeks. My energy is limited, and I’m trying to respect my limitations without guilt. I even had a listener reach out to check on me since it’s been a few more days than normal without a podcast. I feel deeply connected to my podcast community, and I’m grateful for those who listen on the days I can show up.

Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.

Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779

Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling

To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org

#strokeSurvivor #vestibulardisorder #cognitiveFatigue #peerRecoverySupport #mentalHealthJourney #addictionRecovery #emotionalSobriety #chronicIllness #healing#recoveryDailyPodcast

Humility and humiliation are tangled up for me. Practicing healthy thinking when you’re “in the wild” is complicated: “right-sizing myself” vs shrinking myself. It feels safer to live in self-inflicted unworthiness than to risk vulnerability. However, it reinforces my old mindset that pain is inevitable, and I deserve it.

Pain, shame, and humiliation are human experiences and reactions based on trauma, history, fear, expectations, and emotional vulnerability. Once we’re emotionally aware, we choose to either continue carrying those feelings or allow ourselves to heal from them.

When someone offers me a compliment, I get uncomfortable. I brush it off, joke it away, believe the person is wrong about me, and divert the conversation to focus on them. I’m practicing pausing and letting the words land without an immediate response. Believing that someone might be right about my strengths is a spiritual discipline. Accepting praise, not just hearing it, is an act of courage. Believing what others see in me feels like arrogance, but it’s healing to let that truth feel comfortable like home, sitting in it long enough to grow self-esteem.

Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.

Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779

Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling

To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org

#emotionalrecovery #selfesteemjourney #humilitypractice #healingtrauma #selfworthgrowth #mentalhealthrecovery #alcoholismrecovery #spiritualgrowth #innerhealing #selfacceptance

Comparing myself to others without realizing it is one of my character defects. When I judge someone, it feels like I’m trying to pull the covers off them to expose some hidden truth, but really, I’m pulling the covers over myself to hide my own insecurities. My instinct to judge comes from an inferiority complex. I’m bracing myself for imagined failure. A lifetime of experiences set me up to predetermine how interactions with people will go and my mind projects my lack of self-esteem onto them. Judgment is a defense mechanism that keeps me stuck in an old unhealthy mindset.

Self-awareness interrupts my autopilot of comparison and fear. When I recognize mid-thought, “I’m judging this person right now,” everything shifts. Judgment stops being about the other person and becomes a cue to look inward and examine the fear or insecurity underneath. We all act from wounds we didn’t choose, and self-awareness helps me choose humility instead of fear and connect instead of imagine competition.

Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.

YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8OjhKjP1B_vJDObeBDPBrA

Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779

Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling

To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org

#selfawareness #emotionalrecovery #personalgrowth #soberliving #healingjourney #mentalclarity #mindsetshift #innerwork #fearlessliving #recoverywisdom