• Anyone deep in the bottle and lying to themselves
• The “functioning” alcoholics hiding bottles in the garage
• Friends or family watching someone drink themselves to death
• People in recovery who still white-knuckle their way through a gas station
• Anyone who’s ever told themselves “I’ve got it under control”
• People who don’t think they have a drinking problem—but maybe do

Sean Keeley joins Chris and Jeff (Jakob’s out for a month—he’s off getting married, congrats you beautiful bastard) to drop a quiet bomb of a story—the kind that doesn’t come with sirens and flashing lights, just slow, silent self-destruction. No DUIs. No arrests. No bar fights. Just airplane bottles hidden in gloveboxes, vodka disguised as water, and a growing sense of dread that everything was about to fall apart.

Sean lays out how he went from managing people and showing up to work every day to drinking 15 mini bottles of 99 Bananas before checking into rehab. Twice. And when the second round didn’t stick, he didn’t quit. He built his own system. Breathalyzers at home and in the car. Daily accountability to his wife and coworkers. A plan with no wiggle room.

This episode isn’t about hitting bottom. It’s about what happens when you’re about to and decide to turn the wheel.

• 00:00 – Introduction and Sponsorships
  McKelvey Insurance (https://www.mckelveyins.com/) and LightSource Psychotherapy (https://findyourlightsource.com/)
• 02:25 – Golfing Experiences and Personal Stories
  Cold brews, bad golf, hipster confessions, and rake-stepping laughs.
• 12:12 – Introducing Sean and His Unique Story
  Quiet alcoholism that didn’t look chaotic—until it was.
• 24:00 – The Journey to Acknowledging Alcoholism
  Sharpie bottle lines. Hidden Jameson. Growing denial.
• 26:24 – The Journey to Recovery Begins
  First stint in rehab. Detox. Relapse after 45 days.
• 30:30 – The Struggles of Sobriety
  The 99 Bananas episode. Hiding the drinking better. Medical red flags.
• 39:48 – Finding Accountability in Recovery
  Breathalyzers at home and work. No escape hatch.
• 46:49 – The Role of Medication in Sobriety
  From Trazodone to Naltrexone to nothing.
• 54:42 – Building a Support System
  Wife, coworkers, radical honesty—not AA this time.
• 55:15 – Facing the Consequences of Addiction
  Liver failure warnings. Watching others die from it.
• 01:01:14 – The Journey to Sobriety: Finding What Works
  No sponsors. Just systems. Brutal self-honesty.
• 01:10:04 – Building a New Life: Recovery and Personal Growth
  No meds. No excuses. Just better health and clearer living.
• 01:17:43 – Strength in Adversity: Overcoming Life's Challenges
  Christmas Eve becomes Sean’s sober date. One day at a time.
• 01:25:44 – The Ripple Effect: Inspiring Change in Others
  Sean starts giving back, pushing for change, helping others see the signs.

• Wagon Coffee Roasters (Denver-based Recovery Café): https://wagoncoffeeroasters.com
• Il Bel Lago Italian Restaurant (Where Sean celebrated Year 1): https://www.bellagostl.com

• McKelvey Insurance
  https://www.mckelveyins.com
  Quick solutions to real-life insurance bullsh*t.
• LightSource Psychotherapy
  https://findyourlightsource.com
  If you’re f*cked up mentally or emotionally—this is where you start digging out.

• McKelvey Insurance
• LightSource Psychotherapy

• Ben’s Friends St. Louis
• Taylor Streiff Instagram

• Musicians who drink more than they practice
• Restaurant industry lifers trying to stay off the sauce
• Those battling anxiety, addiction, and the lies they told to cover both
• Family members supporting someone in recovery
• Anyone who's ever made a mess of their life and called it "normal"

Taylor Streiff — Musician, Former Heavyweight Boozer, and Proof That Recovery Can Rock

Taylor Streiff rolls into Pondoff's Anonymous with his whole damn soul. He's got restaurant war stories, musician grind tales, and a past soaked in UV Blue and regret. But this isn't your typical redemption arc—this one's got a jukebox, a jazz fest, and enough self-inflicted chaos to fill an HBO mini-series. From getting misdiagnosed and medicated as an anxious kid, to puking UV Blue into a blue toilet, to touring the country as a piano-playing savant, Taylor takes us through his decades-long detour into addiction and how he finally got clean enough to be present for the people he loves. If you've ever thrown up and said "never again" only to do it all again the next night, welcome to church.

• 00:00 Introduction to Pondoff's Anonymous and Sponsors
• 01:45 Meet Taylor Streiff: A Journey in Music and Recovery
• 06:03 The Impact of Family and Community in Recovery
• 08:58 Ego and the Struggles of Addiction
• 11:58 Musical Beginnings and Influences
• 17:52 The Spiritual Connection to Music
• 21:57 Navigating Introversion and Anxiety in Music and Life
• 23:20 Understanding Introversion and Extroversion
• 25:05 Navigating Anxiety and Misdiagnosis
• 27:48 High School Experiences and Social Dynamics
• 30:54 First Jobs and the Restaurant Industry
• 34:53 College Aspirations and Musical Journey
• 42:30 Rejection and Finding a Path
• 44:33 Freshman Year: Love, Loss, and Lessons
• 49:39 Confronting Loss and Addiction
• 52:40 The Illusion of Normalcy
• 56:14 The Struggles of a Touring Musician
• 01:01:11 The Turning Point: A Move to St. Louis
• 01:08:43 The COVID-19 Impact on Drinking Habits
• 01:13:16 The Journey Begins: From Bar Back to Bartender
• 01:15:06 Facing Personal Challenges: Family Health Crises
• 01:16:32 The Turning Point: Seeking Help and AA
• 01:18:37 Struggles with Sobriety: The Reality of Addiction
• 01:21:25 California Sober: A Controversial Approach
• 01:24:38 Vulnerability in Recovery: Honesty and Support
• 01:26:57 The Relapse Debate: Defining Terms and Experiences
• 01:29:25 Rehab Experience: A New Beginning
• 01:32:43 Life After Rehab: Embracing Authenticity
• 01:39:28 Navigating Sobriety in a Triggering Environment
• 01:40:42 The Power of Music in Recovery
• 01:43:44 Authenticity and Connection Through Art
• 01:44:58 The Journey of a Musician in Recovery
• 01:47:15 Balancing Work and Passion
• 01:51:01 The Significance of Recovery Tokens
• 01:53:31 Support Systems in Sobriety
• 01:56:48 The Role of Therapy in Recovery

Who this episode is for:
Anyone who has loved an addict and didn’t know what to do. People drowning in codependency and calling it love. Addicts who swore they would never end up like their parents. Folks in recovery who still flinch at intimacy. And anyone not in recovery who keeps setting their life on fire and calling it growth.

Kristin Casey shows up with zero filters. She is a recovering addict, former sex worker, author, and the ex-girlfriend of Joe Walsh from the Eagles. This is not a glamorized rock story. It is a brutally honest look at addiction, survival, and the messy miracle of healing.

Chris and Jeff dig into modern drug dangers, the collapse of intimacy in addiction, sex work, sobriety, and spiritual growth that actually sticks. Kristin talks about stopping the running, coming back to herself, and why recovery is not just quitting. It is becoming someone new. There is heartbreak, heavy truth, raw honesty, and still a few laughs.

Chapters

• 00:00 Introduction to the Conversation
• 01:54 The Impact of Addiction on Lives
• 04:52 Personal Stories of Struggle and Recovery
• 07:57 The Evolution of Substance Abuse
• 11:05 The Role of Environment in Addiction
• 14:02 The Dangers of Modern Drugs
• 17:10 The Journey Through Recovery
• 19:55 The Influence of Relationships on Addiction
• 23:11 The Challenges of Treatment
• 25:54 Reflections on Sobriety and Life After Addiction
• 38:31 A Fateful Meeting with Joe Walsh
• 42:52 Navigating Love and Heartbreak
• 46:05 The Descent into Addiction
• 51:13 The Impact of Substance Abuse
• 55:09 Understanding Addiction Through Literature
• 01:00:24 Healing Relationships and Personal Growth
• 01:05:40 The Journey of Forgiveness
• 01:10:00 Finding Purpose in Recovery
• 01:16:07 Finding a Second Chance
• 01:19:13 The Struggle for Sobriety
• 01:22:46 The Role of Spirituality in Recovery
• 01:25:27 Empowering Others Through Experience
• 01:29:43 Transitioning from Sex Work to Coaching
• 01:33:43 Navigating Vulnerability in Relationships
• 01:48:01 Supporting Women in Recovery

Kristin Casey’s Books
Explore her work here: https://www.kristincasey.com/
Titles include: Rock Monster: My Life with Joe Walsh and Casey Dancer: A Memoir About Dating, Stripping, and a Little Hot Yoga.

Hosts
Chris and Jeff

Sponsored by
Illinois Recovery Center
McKelvey Insurance
LightSource Psychotherapy

Next week we’ll return to your regularly scheduled programming. This week? We’re fucking off. No guest. No structure. Just Chris, Jeff, and Jakob bullshitting their way through Episode 30, all over the damn place.

Some of it is pure inside baseball—pulling back the curtain on what it looks like to actually run this ship called Pondoff’s Anonymous. Behind-the-scenes sponsor talk, how the pod even keeps the lights on, and the realities of building something that’s equal parts chaos and mission.

But it’s not all production chatter—we veer hard into:

Scammy fake rehab centers in Arizona targeting Native communities

Real recovery work with people like Rikki Fulmer and the mission of Turning Point KC (https://aturningpointkc.org)

The spark of a Wednesday night “spiritual refugee” gathering and what radical inclusivity in recovery could look like

Why rage-fueled algorithms run the internet, and how to fight back by supporting good shit instead of doomscrolling hate

Peanut butter, prednisone, and the little dopamine bombs that replace the old vices

Linkin Park, bachelor parties, back injuries, celebrity rejection emails, and more tangents than a geometry textbook

Messy? Absolutely. Valuable? If you’ve ever wondered how recovery, podcasting, and real life all collide, this one shows it in raw form.

00:00 – Introduction to Sponsors and Mental Health Support

02:22 – Celebrating Milestones and Community Engagement

05:22 – Personal Stories and Connections in Recovery

07:56 – The Importance of Community in Recovery

10:27 – Cultural References and Humor in Recovery

12:56 – Challenges in the Treatment Industry

15:55 – Navigating Personal Relationships and Recovery

18:14 – The Role of Humor in Healing

21:12 – Engagement and Growth of the Podcast

23:50 – Celebrity Outreach and Podcast Goals

26:36 – The Impact of Personal Stories on Recovery

29:15 – Future Plans and Community Events

32:09 – Reflections on Personal Growth and Therapy

34:52 – Engaging with the Audience and Building Community

37:24 – Final Thoughts and Encouragement for Listeners

49:03 – Aging and Physical Challenges

51:41 – Pain Management and Medication Experiences

53:58 – Personal Growth and Relationships

56:20 – Community and Support in Recovery

59:10 – The Importance of Open-Mindedness

01:02:24 – Creating a Safe Space for Healing

01:05:26 – Authenticity in Spirituality

01:08:32 – Navigating Personal and Social Issues

01:11:06 – Content Creation and Community Engagement

01:20:50 – Vegas Winnings & Catering Bills

01:21:35 – Arousal Template Trouble

01:22:14 – Do Friends Even Listen?

01:23:01 – Music by Jeff on Thursdays

01:24:46 – Toby Keith, Punk Rock & 90s Country

01:25:22 – The Chicks & Culture Wars

01:26:03 – Poking Holes & Podcast Dynamics

01:27:20 – Compassion & Mental Health

01:28:12 – Speaker Nights & Alumni Program

01:30:45 – Service, Storytelling & The 12 Steps

01:31:03 – Spiritual Refugees & New Ministry

01:34:43 – Walgreens Memories

01:35:21 – Wallets, Merch & Hats

01:37:22 – IRC Shirts & Kickball Memories

01:38:11 – QR Codes, Stickers & Business Cards

01:38:45 – Potential New Host

01:41:32 – Podcast Network Possibilities

01:42:13 – Criticism & Compliments

01:42:42 – Hosting Without Pressure

01:43:21 – Ketchup, Eggs & Breakfast Wars

01:45:09 – Breakfast Burritos & Wrap Up

Sponsored by McKelvey Insurance (https://mckelveyins.com).

Call or text Evan McKelvey: 618-581-0513.

LightSource Psychotherapy – Belville-based therapy badasses.

https://findyourlightsource.com

Chris, Jeff, and Jakob sit down with Mike Morrison—a Kirkwood kid turned full-blown heroin hustler who somehow lived to tell about it. This one is heavy and hilarious in equal measure: psychedelic trips, fake draft dodges, junkie schemes, spiritual awakenings, and the hard grind of clawing out of the pit.

We’re talking about a guy who went from listening to Hendrix on hash in the ’60s to shooting MDA in a shitty Missouri apartment, rolling Jeeps on barbiturates, scheming with check fraud, and nearly knocking over pharmacies for Dilaudid. And somehow, by the grace of God (or maybe just sheer stubbornness), Mike made it out alive to share decades of recovery wisdom.

Expect stories about Vegas bachelor parties in recovery, psychedelic cave trips with Rastafarians, hustling through shame, and the miracle of finally surrendering.

And of course, the hosts bring the usual mix of gallows humor, chaos, and truth bombs that only Pondoff’s Anonymous can deliver.

00:00 – Chris kicks it off with sponsors: McKelvey Insurance (https://mckelveyins.com) and LightSource Psychotherapy (https://findyourlightsource.com). Brutally honest insurance talk and a heartfelt plug for therapy.

02:18 – Jeff Allen joins the pod, and the guys riff on late wives, hats that say “Make Boofing Great Again,” and recovery swag.

06:05 – Vegas bachelor party recap: blackjack tables, sand dunes, and the absurdity of 10 guys in long-term recovery tearing up Sin City.

11:39 – Music talk: Dead shows, LSD in vials, and why half the kids in Kirkwood in the ’60s ended up junkies.

15:01 – Growing up in picture-perfect Kirkwood… with a heroin problem waiting right around the corner.

20:05 – College life derailed by weed, speed, psychedelics, and the draft. Mizzou couldn’t handle him—Merrimack, SMS, Jamaica trips, and a lot of wasted potential.

24:43 – The allure of psychedelics: peyote, mushrooms, acid, and the lies of anti-drug scare films.

28:31 – How “everyone was doing it” normalized drug use.

30:51 – Consequences piling up: busts, probation, and shady probation officers.

35:30 – The slide into heroin, needles, and a whole new level of shame.

42:30 – Identity crisis, small social circles, hustling, and burning bridges.

49:01 – Hustling to survive: check-kiting, pawning, scams, and scraping by any way possible.

50:59 – The depths of desperation: overdoses, shame, and hustling Dilaudid with his own dad unknowingly in on the scheme.

53:54 – First detox attempts, methadone maintenance, and being 12-stepped for the first time by a doctor.

01:01:02 – A true turning point: when death or prison became the only options.

01:05:00 – Finding treatment programs and community.

01:09:56 – Spiritual awakening moments that flipped the script.

01:18:25 – Sobriety stories and the blessings of long-term recovery.

01:21:53 – How treatment programs evolved, fentanyl challenges, and modern addiction hellscapes.

01:30:08 – The gratitude of doing recovery work and helping others.

01:32:55 – Family’s role in recovery—how loved ones both hurt and heal.

01:39:03 – Community, fellowship, and the strength found in shared struggle.

01:48:17 – Lessons in surrender and letting go.

01:50:05 – The Fourth Step: confronting guilt, shame, and the wreckage of the past.

01:51:56 – Life after recovery: new hobbies, family, and building something real.

02:00:02 – Staying active in recovery vs. getting complacent.

02:02:20 – The many different paths people take to sobriety.

02:08:45 – The ripple effect: how recovery changes not just your life, but everyone around you.

This one is raw, deep, and full of wisdom wrapped in street-level war stories. Buckle the fuck up.

Pondoff’s Anonymous

Episode: Shannon Bradley

Who this episode is for

• Anyone who ever drank screwdrivers in 4th grade and called it “just weekends.”
• People buried in addiction or clawing their way out with bloody fingernails.
• Families of addicts who’ve been through the emotional woodchipper.
• People who confuse “love” with “attention” and keep paying for it in scars.
• Anyone who’s ever chased that warm-blanket drug feeling until it tried to kill them.
• Folks who think Franklin County tourism starts and ends at the jail.

Episode summary

Chris, Jeff, and Jakob fire up the mics with guest Shannon Bradley for a ride that’s equal parts gut punch and gallows humor. Shannon takes them from nine-year-old vodka drinker to behavioral health tech at Illinois Recovery Center, and she doesn’t skip a single ugly or ridiculous beat.

This one’s loaded

• First drink at NINE. Pills by 13.
• Dating older guys who should’ve been carded by morals.
• Franklin County’s unofficial export: addicts and overdoses.
• Ketamine with Dad and couch-surfing as “home.”
• Why overdoses meant the drugs were “good.”
• The night she overdosed, died, got revived, and got robbed—all in one run.
• Shooting Dilaudid for the first time and describing it like a romance novel you can’t put down.
• How “getting kicked out of the hospital for a bigger OD” is somehow a thing.
• Folding a stranger’s laundry and making him cry—service work that matters.
• The long, bloody road out of toxic relationships, dope sickness, and Franklin County’s gravitational pull.

It’s not sanitized. It’s not “inspirational” in that cheesy, poster-on-the-wall way. It’s real, raw, and hilarious in the “you laugh because otherwise you’d cry” way. Chris, Jeff, and Jakob keep the conversation moving, trading digs, throwing lifelines, and sometimes just letting the silence hit.

Episode timeline

1. 00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships
2. 02:18 Weekend Experiences and Recovery Insights
3. 05:26 Introducing Shannon: A Journey Begins
4. 08:33 Shannon's Early Life and Struggles
5. 11:24 The Impact of Substance Use
6. 19:42 Emotional Challenges and Mental Health Awareness
7. 23:37 The Transition from Pills to Heroin
8. 26:01 Navigating High School and Early Relationships
9. 29:10 The Impact of Family and Environment on Addiction
10. 35:30 The Role of Service in Recovery
11. 39:23 Escaping Toxic Relationships and Finding Self-Worth
12. 51:25 Understanding Mental Health and Diagnosis
13. 54:46 The Impact of Medication and Trauma
14. 55:15 Struggles with Addiction and Relationships
15. 01:00:51 The Allure of Substance Use
16. 01:04:11 Overdoses and Consequences
17. 01:10:17 The Journey Through Treatment
18. 01:17:36 Facing Legal Consequences and Reflection
19. 01:21:12 The Burden of Blame
20. 01:22:25 Navigating the Legal System
21. 01:23:43 Family Dynamics and Support
22. 01:28:35 Life in Prison: A Transformative Experience
23. 01:34:08 The Journey of Recovery Begins
24. 01:38:18 Finding Faith and Purpose
25. 01:43:25 Life After Prison: New Beginnings
26. 01:44:57 The Beginning of a Faith Journey
27. 01:47:06 Discovering Higher Power and Recovery
28. 01:49:05 Facing Consequences and Accountability
29. 01:53:35 Emotional Healing and Personal Growth
30. 02:01:05 The Process of Reentry and Family Reconnection
31. 02:10:10 Gratitude and Purpose in Recovery
32. 02:12:27 Building Healthy Relationships Post-Recovery

Sponsored by

• LightSource Psychotherapy
• McKelvey Insurance

Who this episode is for:

- Those deep in the pit of addiction, wondering if they’ll ever climb out

- Folks who’ve seen the rock bottom but haven’t called it quits yet

- Survivors of abusive homes who weaponized humor to survive

- Anyone who’s ever stayed up for three days to “just keep drinking”

- People still haunted by a childhood home wrapped in vines

- Comedy fans who love stand-up that punches truth in the face

- Anyone who’s ever looked in the mirror and hated what stared back

- And especially: People *not* in recovery but battling their own bullshit

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Episode 27: Rafe Williams — Comedian, Sobriety Savage, and Trauma Alchemist

Rafe Williams doesn’t pull punches. Onstage or off. In this raw-ass sit-down with Chris, Jeff, and Jakob, he peels back the curtain on a life that started in the coal-mining bars of Dowell, Illinois, and took a detour through abusive childhood, drunken barstool nights, cocaine-fueled “fun,” and finally—mercifully—sobriety.

This one is messy, hilarious, brutally honest, and damn near spiritual. From getting his ass beat “just because” by his dad, to forging laughter as survival, to hitting a rock bottom not with a bang but a long, slow skid—Rafe lays it all bare.

You’ll laugh. You’ll wince. You might cry. You’ll definitely hear the gospel of “Fuck you, I’m done” recovery.

And yeah—he’s funny as hell the whole way through.

🔥 Don't Miss:

- Why Rafe says *The Artist’s Way* helped him more than some AA groups: https://juliacameronlive.com/the-artists-way/

- His insane camcorder prank that hijacked a family Christmas

- The trauma of watching your childhood home literally rot

- His message to anyone who slid into his DMs and didn’t hear back: "Send another one. I'm trying, motherfucker.”

- PreventEd shoutout: the org that helps real people find real treatment: https://prevented.org/

- Rafe’s upcoming stand-up benefit show on September 6 at COCA in St. Louis: https://www.cocastl.org/

- Why forgiveness without an apology might be your only way out

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⏱️ Episode Timestamp Breakdown

00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships

05:59 Personal Stories of Addiction and Sobriety

11:51 Growing Up in Southern Illinois

17:59 Navigating Life After Addiction

30:19 Reflections on Self-Identity and Sobriety

36:02 The Power of Disgust as a Motivator

42:02 Facing the Past and Forgiveness

48:00 The Role of Humor and Creativity in Healing

01:03:43 The Weight of Potential: A Friend's Wake-Up Call

01:09:12 Friendship and Hard Truths: The Cost of Caring

01:17:30 Navigating Recovery: The Journey of Self-Discovery

01:23:02 Rebuilding Reputation: The Path to Redemption

01:32:31 The Power of Listening and Direction

01:37:49 Navigating Relationships and Misunderstandings

01:43:16 The Complexity of Character and Identity

01:50:25 The Comedy Industry: Navigating Success and Pressure

01:58:51 Navigating the Waters of Recovery

02:04:10 The Pressure of Accountability in Recovery

02:12:12 The Importance of Routine and Structure

02:18:15 Learning from the Craft of Comedy

02:25:51 Influences and Inspirations in Comedy

02:32:01 The Evolution of Comedy Careers

02:39:36 Closing Thoughts and Future Endeavors

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Sponsored by:

🛡️ McKelvey Insurance – https://mckelveyins.com

🧠 LightSource Psychotherapy – https://findyourlightsource.com