Misery Is Optional – Redefining Softness, Structure & Anxiety with Mark Rashid & Crissi McDonald | Ep 32 Equine Assisted World cover art

Misery Is Optional – Redefining Softness, Structure & Anxiety with Mark Rashid & Crissi McDonald | Ep 32 Equine Assisted World

Misery Is Optional – Redefining Softness, Structure & Anxiety with Mark Rashid & Crissi McDonald | Ep 32 Equine Assisted World

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In this thought-provoking follow-up episode of Equine Assisted World, Rupert Isaacson reunites with legendary horseman Mark Rashid and clinician-author Crissi McDonald. This time, the conversation shifts deeper into the internal landscapes of both horse and human, exploring what it really means to be soft—without losing structure.From navigating low-level panic and reframing anxiety, to understanding when pressure is productive and when it breaks us, Mark and Crissi offer powerful insights not only for horse people, but for anyone seeking a more peaceful way of being in the world. Broadcasting from Happy Dog Ranch in Colorado, they also share how kindness, community, nature, and play are essential ingredients in creating meaningful transformation.(If you want to support the show, you can do so at Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/LongRideHome )✨ What You’ll Learn in This Episode:The Paradox of Softness & Anxiety (Starts at 01:00)Why striving for softness can trigger anxietyMark's pressure scale (0 to 10) and self-regulation in real timeHow internal tension blocks horse-human communicationSpeed Bumps and Nervous System Awareness (Starts at 08:00)Crissi explains the compounding stress of modern lifeWhy we don’t need to always be calm—and how to ride the nervous system waveThe idea of setting stress aside just long enough to connectWhen Softness Meets an Unready Horse (Starts at 13:00)What to do when your horse is not in a soft stateThe art of doing what you can do instead of forcing what you can’tPressure vs. Anxiety (Starts at 25:00)How pressure can lead to problem-solving, while anxiety leads to shutdownA lesson in reframing stress as “just an event, not an emergency”Why “Misery is Optional” became a clinic mottoHow We Live Matters (Starts at 31:00)Crissi’s 20-year journey toward balance: food, sleep, connection, movementThe surprising role of creativity (like watercolor and photography) in emotional regulationClinic Structure That Feels Like Freedom (Starts at 36:00)Daily dojo sessions: breath, safety, and playful presenceGiving students permission not to ride—and why that sets the tone for learningLetting laughter and safety replace performance pressureNature, Tribe & the Horse-Human Herd (Starts at 42:00)Designing Happy Dog Ranch to support exploration, not confinementThe unseen structure that holds clinics togetherHow horses themselves teach people, especially when given time and spaceSoftness With Structure (Starts at 52:00)Why softness without structure isn’t softness at allRain contact, feel, and feedback loops in real timeMark’s practical metaphors: the coffee cup, the skeleton, and invisible teaching momentsBuilding Confidence Without Force (Starts at 1:10:00)How support teams guide riders back from the edge of overwhelmLetting people grow without letting them get lostKindness as Framework (Starts at 1:20:00)The radical idea that a clinic structure can be kind—not punishingWhy many riders unconsciously argue with happinessThe ripple effects of affirming "You're okay. Your horse is okay."Reclaiming Tribe & Breaking the Misery Habit (Starts at 1:30:00)The loneliness epidemic in the horse world—and how clinics become familyMark and Crissi’s reminder: We get good at what we practice—even if it’s unhappinessWhy being of service to horses and humans might be the simplest cure for anxiety🌟 Memorable Moments from the Episode:"Misery is optional"—what it means and how it reshapes learning (25:00)Mark’s coffee cup metaphor for structured softness (1:00:00)How “crazy time” with horses taught Rupert to prioritize play and energy release (23:00)Why one rider’s fear melted just by being told she didn’t have to ride (37:00)When anxiety isn’t really anxiety—it’s just too much pressure without strategy (26:00)🤝 Connect with Mark Rashid & Crissi McDonald: Mark's Website: https://markrashid.com Crissi’s Website: https://crissimcdonald.com Books by Mark Rashid: Considering the Horse: Tales of Problems Solved and Lessons Learned: https://amzn.to/3GbhmrKFinding the Missed Path: The Art of Restarting Horse: https://amzn.to/44e47i2A Journey to Softness: In Search of Feel and Connection with the Horse: https://amzn.to/44c0KIjFor the Love of the Horse: Looking Back, Looking Forward: https://amzn.to/4lkx8zDBooks by Crissi McDonald: Rising From the Sea (North to Home Book 3): https://amzn.to/3ZL864hContinuing The Ride: Rebuilding Confidence from the Ground Up: https://amzn.to/40iZUsfThe Clock in the Water (North to Home): https://amzn.to/40gmv8NGetting Along with Horses: An Evolution in Understanding: https://amzn.to/4k4E8zs🌐 See All of Rupert’s Programs and Shows: Rupert Isaacson: https://rupertisaacson.com Equine-Assisted Programs: https://newtrailslearning.com📲 Follow Us: Long Ride Home Facebook: https://facebook.com/longridehome.lrh Instagram: https://instagram.com/longridehome_lrh YouTube: https://youtube.com/@longridehomeNew Trails Learning ...

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