Episodes

  • Episode 69 – Nice

    Episode 69 – Nice
    May 16 2025
    "You're a pink pony girl and you dance at the club"

    - Nobody plots how she’d milk the podcast in the event of Ben’s death.
    - We warn Mayor McCheese to keep an eye out for the Hamburglar.
    - We get derailed by an emergency text about a vagina car.
    - We revel in the miracle of our lost items being returned to us.
    - Ben raises an eyebrow at the portrayal of a young Paul Giamatti in Black Mirror.
    - We argue over who gets our AI generated commercial money in death.
    - We establish The Pony’s for Puppies Foundation.
    - Ben is starting to take issue with the portrayal of milk drinkers in the media.
    - Nobody joins the Greg Davies unlikely sex symbol bandwagon.
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    1 hr and 8 mins
  • Episode 68 – Not Now Facts!

    Episode 68 – Not Now Facts!
    Apr 22 2025
    "Will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful?"

    - Ben has questions about Yoplait’s new tagline: Australia’s number one family yogurt.
    - Nobody doesn’t need facts in her period pads.
    - Ben introduces a new segment: Orgy Tips.
    - Nobody wants to determine the line between a normal attraction to a cartoon character and a fetish.
    - Nobody’s friend makes an unusual discovery in the glove compartment of his rental car.
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • Episode 67 – Cargo Panties™

    Episode 67 – Cargo Panties™
    Mar 31 2025
    "And we'll fly and we'll fall and we'll burn..."

    - Nobody doesn’t want to have to make a doctor’s appointment to be told she’s fine.
    - We discuss the difficulties of recording a relaxation exercise with noisy roommates.
    - Ben resonates with a familiar scene in The Monkey.
    - Nobody experiences a Greg Davies fever dream while binging The Cleaner.
    - Ben attends a Taskmaster taping and gets caught off guard in the gym shower.
    - Ben discovers how pivotal the lint roller is in television.
    - We contemplate how much attention to pay to the pre-flight safety demonstration.
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    1 hr and 5 mins
  • Episode 66 – The Full Ass Cut

    Episode 66 – The Full Ass Cut
    Mar 7 2025
    "Switch it up like Nintendo"

    - We make our triumphant return to podcasting.
    - Nobody challenges Anthony LaPaglia to show Ben how fun he can be.
    - Nobody struggles to say she isn't attracted to Chris Hemsworth.
    - We enjoy the latest double entendres from Australian Survivor.
    - We discuss censorship nonsense and dissect the lyrics of Sabrina Carpenter and Charli XCX.
    - We’re forced to revisit the topic of toilet etiquette after Nobody has a weird bathroom encounter.
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    1 hr and 7 mins
  • Episode 65 – Tom Hardy Vs. The Kraken

    Episode 65 – Tom Hardy Vs. The Kraken
    Feb 7 2025
    "You'll believe God is a woman"

    - Ben doesn’t want people to think he’s crying at dumb movie moments.
    - Nobody is holding space for Wicked.
    - Ben faces a conundrum at a Thai massage parlour.
    - Nobody reveals how she’d get around without legs.
    - We pitch Michael Bay‘s next blockbuster: Tom Hardy Vs. The Kraken.
    - We swap crazy Tom Hardy stories.
    - Nobody’s car breaks down and a man with fat fingers shows up to fix it.
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    1 hr and 8 mins
  • Episode 64 – The Egg In My Bathroom

    Episode 64 – The Egg In My Bathroom
    Jan 21 2025
    "It's no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy"

    - Ben doesn’t trust a waterproof label.
    - We discuss the history of eating mummies and everything else on Earth.
    - Ben has a massage parlour business proposal.
    - Ben wants to know how long you’re obligated to keep a gift for.
    - We discuss the egg in Ben’s bathroom.
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    1 hr and 3 mins
  • Episode 63 – Can I Borrow Your Child?

    Episode 63 – Can I Borrow Your Child?
    Dec 28 2024
    "I'm only human, can't you see? I made, I made a mistake"

    - Ben prides himself on his ability to find things in Bunnings.
    - Ben needs someone to accompany him to Funfields water park, so he doesn’t look like a creep.
    - Nobody doesn’t want to go out drinking when she has a perfectly good apartment.
    - Nobody endures a perfect storm of food poisoning – aka. her Christmas nadir.
    - We check in on the Gävle Goat for 2024 and learn about the IKEA goat.
    - Nobody is impressed by Ben’s roommates six in one shower gel.
    - Ben wants to know if he’s justified in killing an old woman at the movies.
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    50 mins
  • Episode 62 – Boron And Peanut Butter

    Episode 62 – Boron And Peanut Butter
    Nov 26 2024
    "Teenage angst has paid off well, now I'm bored and old"

    - Ben wants to know more about the science experiments that Nobody would perform during a time loop.
    - Ben tackles the Hollywood trend of casting the hottest people in the world as ugly characters.
    - Helen Mirren sheds a tear over the fact that Kurt Cobain never got to use GPS.
    - Nobody argues that US politics boils down to guessing what the founding fathers would have thought about modern issues.
    - Ben espouses his distaste for the question ‘Did you notice anything different?’
    - Ben reveals why he always turns down the free rewards at the supermarket.
    - Nobody thinks that farming sounds like a scam.
    - Ben breaks down his Pokémon Go addiction and we revisit the idea of gamifying our work day.
    - Ben catches his new iPhone’s ‘always on’ screen slacking off.
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    59 mins