In this episode, I’m digging into something that’s been showing up not just in my own life, but in the lives of clients, friends, and so many of us trying to live and lead with love. Today we’re talking about what separates us from our truest selves—and what it takes to return.

I walk through the Cycle of Socialization, a framework from educator Roberta “Bobby” Harro that opened my eyes to how we’re conditioned over time to move away from who we really are. And I don’t just mean society at large—I mean within our own bodies, thoughts, and behaviors.

We’re talking:

• How our earliest environments shape who we think we should be
• Why compliance, control, and criticism are not love (no matter how pretty we package them)
• How trauma isn’t just what happened—it’s what happens inside us
• The danger of invalidating your own (or someone else’s) pain
• And the power of practicing love without force, without shame, and without rigid demands

This episode is especially for those of us leading in our communities, our families, and our work. If we want to love and lead others well, we have to get honest about how we treat ourselves—and where that treatment comes from.

Before you move on to the next thing in your day, I invite you to reflect:

Where in your life are you operating from control, conditioning, or unhealed trauma?

And just as important:

What might it look like to meet yourself with love instead?

Because love doesn’t demand perfection—it invites connection.

And that starts within.

Thanks for being here with me. I’ll see you in the next one.

Hello, beautiful soul — welcome back to Love Is Bomb. Today we’re talking about something that sounds simple but hits deeply: the difference between self-care and self-love. Because while bubble baths, brunches, and binge-watching your favorite shows might give you a temporary break, they’re not always enough to heal what’s underneath.

In this episode, Ashley breaks down:

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• Why self-care is just the gateway — not the destination
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• How self-love is an active practice that starts with compassion and leads to identity
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• The emotional cost of confusing temporary relief with lasting restoration
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• Why your true leadership power comes from healing yourself first
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• A faith-based framework for practicing self-love through God’s character
• And the soulful difference between care that soothes… and love that transforms

You’ll learn the 3 stages of a self-love practice — compassion, self-discovery, and identity — and how they can ground you when life throws you off balance. Ashley also shares a beautiful meditation and “homework” that includes Hadaway’s throwback anthem "What is Love" (yes, really) to help you reflect and reconnect with who you are — beyond the roles, masks, or hustle.

Because when you love yourself well, you show up better in your home, your leadership, and your community.

Song of the Day:

🎶 "What Is Love" – Hadaway (1991)

Don’t forget:

Tune in next time as we talk about the things that pull us away from love and how to return to it with intention. Until then — breathe deep, hold yourself gently, and remember: You are worthy of love and care. Always.

Let me know if you'd like a shorter version for Apple Podcasts/Spotify or a pull quote for promotion!

Welcome to the very first episode of the Love Is Balm podcast. I’m your host, Ashley Cummings — trauma therapist, identity specialist, and guide on the journey toward healing, self-love, and authentic leadership. This episode invites you to pause, reflect, and consider the emotional foundations that shape your leadership.

In this powerful opening conversation, we will explore:

• Why true leadership begins with self-love and emotional grounding
• How internal turmoil stifles your brilliance and dims your light
• The emotional prisons that keep leaders from stepping fully into their purpose
• A faith-based perspective on self-love, drawn from John 10:10 and Matthew 22:37-39
• The difference between appearing strong and being whole
• A personal story of navigating emotional pain and reconnecting with self-trust
• How self-love fuels our ability to lead with integrity, clarity, and compassion

This episode serves as a love letter and a guide to help you release emotional chaos, reconnect with your purpose, and lead from a place of wholeness. The journey to building a loving, sustainable world starts within. Take Ashley’s invitation to reflect, breathe, and consider how you can return to yourself — because when we lead with love, we help heal the world.

Stay tuned for the next episode where Ashley will explore the difference between self-care and self-love — and why it matters.