We hear the term "Self-Care" everywhere—usually accompanied by images of three-hour spa days or solo vacations. But for parents in the "messy middle," those things don't just feel rare—they feel impossible. When we can't achieve the Instagram version of self-care, we end up feeling two things: Guilt and Pressure.

Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Dr. Brittany Wade, a Licensed Psychologist and founder of Thrive Child Psychology. Together, they are stripping away the "luxury" label and reframing self-care as what it actually is: Nervous System Regulation. If you’ve ever felt like getting the dishes done was "self-care," or if you struggle to ask your partner for the rest you actually need, this episode is for you. We’re moving beyond the "to-do" list to help you build a Secure Base for yourself so you can be one for your children.

1. The Self-Care Myth: Why we need to stop viewing self-care as an "extra" to be earned and start viewing it as a biological necessity for regulation.
2. Productivity vs. Regulation: The hard truth that checking off your to-do list (like cleaning the baseboards or doing the dishes) is productivity, not self-care.
3. The Self-Care Grief Process: Acknowledging and mourning the loss of the "old version" of yourself who had unlimited time for gym sessions and solo travel.
4. Equal vs. Equitable Rest: Why a 50/50 split of chores doesn't account for who is the most "depleted," and how to negotiate for "Equitable Rest" with your partner.
5. Modeling Regulation: Why the "Selfless Parent" narrative actually harms our children, and how modeling self-care provides them with a regulatory toolkit for life.
6. Micro-Regulation: Small, 5-minute shifts you can build into your current schedule—from the "coffee in silence" to the "three breaths in the driver's seat."

1. [03:29] – Redefining Self-Care: Why it’s not a luxury, it’s regulation.
2. [05:53] – The "Guilt and Pressure" cycle: Why self-care often feels like another chore.
3. [08:37] – Self-Care vs. Leisure: Understanding the difference between a hot shower and a round of golf.
4. [12:38] – The Modeling Aspect: Why your kids need to see you taking deep breaths.
5. [14:26] – Practical Strategies: Exercise, family walks, and protecting 30 minutes.
6. [15:50] – The Morning Reset: The clinical value of coffee in silence.
7. [18:43] – Parenting Reframe: Why self-care doesn't always have to be done "alone."
8. [21:55] – The Productivity Trap: Why the dishes are not self-care.

It is perhaps the conversation every parent dreads the most: explaining death to a child. Whether it’s the loss of a pet, a grandparent, or a sudden tragedy in the community, our instinct is to protect—to shield our children from the pain of grief. But as we often discuss on this show, protection isn't about the absence of pain; it's about the presence of a Secure Base.

Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by her long-time friend and colleague, Abigail Gellene-Beaudoin, LCSW. Abigail is a Certified Child Life Specialist with deep expertise in palliative care and supporting families through medical trauma, chronic illness, and end-of-life transitions. Together, they pull back the curtain on why we are so afraid to talk about death and how our own "Internal Weather" as parents shapes our children’s ability to process grief.

If you’ve been searching for the "right" words to say or if you’re navigating a loss right now, this episode provides a compassionate, science-backed roadmap for moving from overwhelmed to attuned during life’s hardest moments.

In this episode, we discuss:

1. Defining Palliative Care: Shifting the focus from "cure" to "comfort" and why this mindset shift is vital for family communication.
2. Anticipatory Grief: The "amorphous" phase that happens before a loss occurs. Why kids sense the tension and how they fill in the blanks with their own (often scarier) stories.
3. Defiance as Communication: Why a child’s opposition or acting out is often a distress signal of powerlessness and a desperate search for control.
4. The 10-Minute "Connection Dosage": How using a timer and Child-Directed Interaction (CDI) can fill a child’s security bucket when the family system is stressed by loss.
5. The "D-Word": Why we must avoid euphemisms like "went to sleep" or "passed away." Abigail provides a specific, concrete script for explaining death (e.g., explaining how the brain and body stop working).
6. The Sturdy Parent: How to model healthy grief by crying in front of your children while reassuring them: "I am sad, but I can handle this and I am still taking care of you."
7. Continuing Bonds: Rituals for keeping a loved one part of the family "fishbowl," from favorite breakfast spots to rainbow window film.
8. Re-Grieving Through Development: Why a child may seem "fine" at age three but experience acute grief again at age six as they begin to understand the permanence of death.

About Our Guest: Abigail Gellene-Baudoin is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified Child Life Specialist (CCLS), and child-centered play therapist dedicated to helping children and families navigate the complexities of healthcare and loss. She is the author of several children’s books designed to provide parents with the scripts they need for life's hardest conversations.

Resources & Connect with Us:

1. Abigail’s Book: When Hope Changes

But my child can play video games for eight hours straight—they can't possibly have ADHD." If you’ve ever said those words, this episode is for you. We often think of ADHD as a deficit of attention, but in reality, it’s a struggle with Executive Functioning—the brain’s internal management system.

Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Dr. Stephanie Fox, a clinical psychologist and expert in neurodevelopmental assessments. Dr. Fox brings a unique perspective to the table: she is both a specialist who evaluates ADHD and an "ADHDer" herself, diagnosed in adulthood.

Together, they cut through the noise to discuss why ADHD is often missed in girls, how "hyperfocus" is actually a clinical sign of the diagnosis, and why a comprehensive evaluation is a "gift" of self-compassion for your child. If you’re ready to move beyond the labels and understand your child’s brain from the Inside-Out, tune in.

In this episode, we discuss:

1. The Focus Myth: Why the ability to hyperfocus on video games, reading, or scrapbooking actually points toward an ADHD diagnosis, not away from it.
2. The Brain's "CEO": A deep dive into Executive Functioning—the management tools we use for task initiation, working memory, and time management.
3. The "Silent" Presentation in Girls: How socialization and perfectionism lead to girls suffering in silence or being misdiagnosed with "just anxiety."
4. Twice Exceptional (2e): The intersection of high IQ and ADHD, and why "good grades" don't mean a child isn't struggling.
5. The "Gift" of Assessment: Why an evaluation isn't about a label, but about providing a "user manual" for your child’s brain to foster self-compassion.
6. Finding the "Jam": How neurodivergent individuals find success by aligning their unique strengths with the right career and environment.

About Our Guest: Dr. Stephanie Fox is the founding psychologist at Four Corner Psychological Services. She specializes in comprehensive evaluations for ADHD, Autism, and learning disabilities. Her work is dedicated to helping individuals and families understand their neurobiology to move from shame to empowerment.

Resources & Connect with Us:

1. Four Corners Psychological Services: You can find Dr. Fox's practice here.
2. Integrated Behavioral Health Newsletter: Get expert tips, practical tools, and encouragement straight to your inbox—designed for parents who want guidance, reassurance, and fresh ideas for raising resilient kids. Sign up here.
3. Book a Consultation: If you suspect ADHD or neurodiversity is playing a role in your family's dynamic, book a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation with our team at Integrated Behavioral Health.

What does it mean to be a "Modern Dad"? For many fathers, the role has shifted significantly from the previous generation. It’s no longer just about providing financial stability; it’s about being emotionally involved, attuned, and interested in the internal lives of our children. But how do we navigate this shift when we didn't have a roadmap for it?

Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Dr. Gabe Casher, a clinical psychologist and father who is passionate about supporting dads through the identity transition of parenthood. Together, they explore the "Psychologist to Parent" shift, the trap of linking self-worth to achievement, and why the most powerful thing a father can do is learn the art of a genuine apology.

If you’ve ever felt the pressure to "teach" rather than "connect," or if you're trying to break generational cycles of anger-based parenting, this episode is an essential guide for moving from overwhelmed to attuned.

In this episode, we discuss:

1. The Identity Shift: Moving from the "Provider" role to the "Attuned Participant" and why the transition to fatherhood changes every other relationship in your life.
2. Achievement vs. Worth: How children challenge the stereotypical link between achievement and self-worth in men, and the healing that comes from being loved for "who you are" rather than "what you do."
3. Breaking Generational Cycles: Navigating the transition from fear-based parenting to predictability and secure attachment.
4. The "I’m Sorry" Practice: Why repair is the most important predictor of a child's psychological health—and how to swallow your pride and own your "stuff."
5. The Phone-Free Reset: A tangible, 5-minute challenge to increase attunement and notice the "Inside-Out" experience of your family.
6. Self-Care for Dads: Reframing time away as "not selfish," but as a necessary recharge to be a kinder, more patient parent.

About Our Guest: Dr. Gabe Casher is a Clinical Psychologist in Denver, CO. In addition to his clinical practice, he facilitates a monthly Dad's Coffee Group at The Den in the Highlands, creating a space for fathers to build community, process their experiences, and move toward more intentional, attuned parenting.

Resources & Connect with Us:

1. Fatherhood Identity Support: To learn more about Dr. Casher's Dad's Coffee Group and his work with fathers, visit The Den's website.
2. Panorama Psychology: Find Dr. Casher and his team on their website.
3. Identify Your Parenting Values: Ditch the guilt and start parenting with intention. Download our Free Values Workbook here.
4. Book a Consultation: If you are a father looking for support in your own identity transition, book a...

If you’ve ever felt like anxiety is the uninvited cousin who showed up to your family dinner and refused to leave, this episode is for you. We often view a child’s anxiety as a problem they are carrying individually, but the clinical truth is that healing happens from the Inside-Out. To change the child’s experience, we often have to change the family environment.

Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Dr. Eleanore Hall, a clinical child psychologist and specialist in pediatric anxiety and OCD. Together, they dive into the "Anatomy of Anxiety" and explore why our parental instinct to protect our children from distress—known clinically as Parental Accommodation—can unintentionally keep the anxiety cycle alive.

From the "Dirty Fishbowl" metaphor to the "Vending Machine" effect of behavioral outbursts, this conversation provides a compassionate, science-backed roadmap for parents who want to move from feeling overwhelmed to feeling attuned.

In this episode, we discuss:

1. The Anxiety Spectrum: Why anxiety is a "backseat driver" that everyone experiences, and how to know when it’s starting to rob your child of their joy.
2. The Fishbowl Metaphor: Why we can’t just "clean the fish" (the child) if the "water" (the environment) stays dirty.
3. Reassurance vs. Information: Identifying the "leaky bucket" of reassurance seeking and how to stop feeding the anxiety drug.
4. The Bike Seat Metaphor: Learning when to hold on and when to take the brave risk of letting go so your child can learn they are resilient.
5. The "Vending Machine" Effect: Why behaviors often get worse (the "extinction burst") before they get better, and how to ride the wave.
6. Supportive Statements: How to validate your child's fear while simultaneously instilling 100% confidence that they can get through it.

About Our Guest: Dr. Eleanore Hall is a clinical child psychologist specializing in pediatric anxiety, OCD, and challenging behaviors. Her training ranges from acute care settings at McLean Hospital to parent-focused work via the SPACE program (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions). She is passionate about working with the whole family system to get kids back to the important work of being kids.

Resources & Connect with Us:

1. Pediatric OCD and Anxiety: The International OCD Foundation has several helpful resources on their website.
2. SPACE Program: SPACE stands for Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions and is a parent-based treatment program for children and adolescents with anxiety, OCD, and related problems.
3. Dr. Eleanore Hall's practice: You can find Dr. Eleanore at

No amount of individual therapy or premarital counseling truly prepares you for the emotional "hit" of parenting. When a child screams, refuses to brush their teeth, or struggles at school, it doesn't just trigger our parenting instincts—it often hijacks our relationship with our partner.

Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Allison Rimland, LPC, an expert in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Together, they pull back the curtain on "The Cycle"—the reactive pattern of pursuing and withdrawing that keeps even the best parents stuck in high-conflict loops.

If you’ve ever felt like your partner is the "bad cop," or if you find yourself "future tripping" about your child's success during a bedtime meltdown, this episode is a roadmap for healing your partnership from the Inside-Out.

In this episode, we discuss:

1. The Anatomy of the Cycle: Understanding the roles of the Pursuer (who monitors for closeness) and the Withdrawer (who monitors for peace).
2. The "Soup" of Emotions: Why parenting conflict feels like a "puree" where we can’t distinguish our current stress from our childhood history.
3. The A.R.E. Acronym: A deep dive into Sue Johnson’s framework—Are you Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged?
4. Future Tripping: How our fears about our child's future (e.g., "They'll never be employed!") drive us to be harsh and critical with our partners in the present.
5. The Power of Caregiver Intent: Learning to see the "good intentions" behind a partner’s withdrawal or criticism.
6. Modeling the Repair: Why your kids don't need perfect parents; they need to see how a safe relationship recovers from a messy moment.
7. Your Partner as a Resource: Shifting from "me against you" to "us against the pattern."

About Our Guest: Allison Rimland, LPC, is a licensed professional counselor and the founder of Thrive Family Services. She specializes in Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples, helping them navigate the complexities of attachment, parenting, and relational healing.

Resources & Connect with Us:

1. Read Allison’s Blog: Navigating Differences in Parenting Styles
2. Read Allison’s Blog: Five Things Couples Can Do To Be Good Partners in Parenting
3. Visit Thrive Family Services: thrivefamilyservices.com
4. Identify Your Parenting Values: Ditch the guilt and start parenting with intention. Download our Free

Are you tired of the "perfect parenting" scripts that seem impossible to follow in real life? Welcome to the trailer for Kids These Days!

In this show, we’re moving beyond the "stuffy expert" persona to have honest, science-backed conversations about the biological reality of raising humans. This podcast is a space for the parents who are done with perfection and ready for attunement.

Resources & Connect with Us:

1. Follow the Journey: Hit "Follow" or "Subscribe" right now so you never miss an episode. Our official launch is January 13th!
2. Identify Your Parenting Values: Ditch the guilt and start parenting with intention. Download our Free Values Workbook here.
3. Instagram: Join our community @Integratedbh.
4. Website: Learn more about our specialized therapy and parent coaching at Integrated Behavioral Health.

You don’t have to be perfect to be a great parent. Let’s figure out how to raise kids these days together.

Legal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.