Guest: Dr. Lindsey O’Brennan, Licensed Psychologist & Founder of Morningstar Wellness

On paper, they look perfect. Straight A’s, varsity spots, and a resume that would make a CEO jealous. But for many high-achieving teens, the cost of functioning at such a high level has quietly become too great.

In this episode, Dr. Courtney sits down with longtime colleague and performance expert Dr. Lindsey O’Brennan to discuss the "concoction" of achievement and anxiety. They dive into the subtle but vital difference between healthy striving and rigid high achievement, and what happens to a teen’s identity when their self-worth is tied entirely to their "Gold Star" status.

1. Healthy Striving vs. High Achievement: How to tell if your child is chasing a goal because they love it, or because they feel they must to be worthy.
2. The "Achievement Train" Metaphor: What happens when the train barrels toward success but the passenger (your teen) has no idea who is driving or how to get off.
3. The Resilience Gap: Why "gifted" kids often struggle to bounce back from failure because they’ve never had the chance to practice it.
4. The "Three Strikes" Rule: Dr. Lindsey’s tactical red flags for when "end-of-semester stress" has turned into a mental health crisis.
5. Parental Modeling: How high-achieving parents can pull back the curtain on their own stress and model the power of a "pause."
6. The Gift of Validation: Why witnessing your teen "fall apart" without judgment is the most protective thing a parent can do.

1. Check the Driver’s Seat: Ask your teen (and yourself): "Who is driving this train? Is it your values, or is it an internal critic/external pressure?"
2. Narrate the Pause: Even if you aren't ready to change your busy schedule, name it. "I’ve realized I’m on my phone a lot when I get home to unwind. I’m just recognizing that pattern."
3. Validate the "B": For a high achiever, a single B-grade can feel like a world-ending event. Before problem-solving, sit with them in that distress.
4. Seasons, Not Sprints: Reframe busy months (like sports season or finals) as "sprints" that must be followed by a "recoup" season to be sustainable.

1. Morningstar Wellness: Dr. Lindsey’s practice specializing in high-achieving teens and performance coaching. Morningstarwellness.com
2. Integrated Behavioral Health: Dr. Courtney’s group practice in Colorado, offering therapy and evaluations for the "smart but scattered" and anxious high-achiever. integratedbhs.com

Legal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.

Have you ever felt dismissed by your child's school? Your child’s teacher reports they are well-behaved and hitting benchmarks, yet the second they hit the front door at home, they explode into a "whirlwind" of meltdowns.

In this episode, Dr. Courtney sits down with Hannah Higgins, LCSW, a former school social worker and neurodivergent advocate, to demystify the phenomenon of masking. Hannah shares her "both sides of the table" perspective to help parents understand why kids hold it together at school only to crumble at home (often called After-School Restraint Collapse). We dive into the legal differences between IEPs and 504 plans, why you should trust your gut even when grades look "fine," and how to use Hannah’s new app, Advocado Solutions, to become a confident advocate for your child.

• The Reality of Masking: Why "good behavior" at school can actually be a sign of internal suffering and sensory overwhelm.
• 90s Stigma vs. Modern Advocacy: Shifting the narrative from "over-medicating" to creating neurodivergent-affirming environments.
• The "Safe Place" Meltdown: Why your child saves their biggest emotions for you (and why that’s actually a sign of trust).
• IEP vs. 504 Plans: A breakdown of how to initiate the process and why documentation is your best friend.
• Sensory Room Advocacy: Why every school should have a dedicated space for decompression and how to ask for it.
• Trusting Your Gut: Why parental intuition is a valid data point in school meetings.

1. Get it in Writing: If you have concerns, document them. Written communication is the first step toward legal protections in the school system.
2. Stay Curious, Not Punitive: When your child has a post-school meltdown, ask: "What was the sensory load today?" rather than "Why are you acting out?"
3. The "8th Sense": Understand Interoception—the ability to feel what’s happening inside the body. Many neurodivergent kids struggle to name their hunger, thirst, or overwhelm until it’s too late.
4. Collaboration is King: Schools work best when parents and teachers partner together. Don't be afraid to share what works at home so it can be integrated into the classroom.

• Hannah Rose Therapy: Psychotherapy for neurodivergent adolescents and adults. Hannahrosetherapy.com
• Avocado Solutions: Hannah’s new app designed to help parents navigate the IEP and 504 process with confidence. Advocado.solutions
• Legal Resources: * Colorado Department of Education
• IDEA (Individuals with Disabilities Education Act)
• Integrated Behavioral Health: Dr. Courtney’s group practice in Colorado, providing evaluations and therapy for neurodivergent hurdles. Integratedbhs.com

Guest: Annie Close, Pediatric Occupational Therapist & Founder of OWN Pediatric Therapy

Potty training is often treated like a high-stakes behavioral exam, but what if the struggle isn't about "willpower" at all? In this episode, Dr. Courtney sits down with pediatric pelvic health expert Annie Close to discuss why so many families hit a wall with potty training. We dive deep into the physiological "puzzle pieces"—like pelvic floor tension and chronic constipation—that can trigger a child’s fight-or-flight response and lead to those frustrating "sneaky" accidents.

• The Mindset Shift: Why we should treat potty training like learning to ride a bike—a complex motor skill that requires patience, not a three-day "miracle."
• The Sneaky Enemy: How chronic constipation (even if your child poops daily) can create "mega-rectums" and "sneaky peas."
• The Physical Signs of Readiness: It’s more than just age. We discuss interoception (the ability to feel what’s happening inside the body) and the ability to pause during play.
• The "Poop Whistle" & Other Tools: Actionable tips to help your child relax their pelvic floor, including deep breathing, party blowers, and proper toilet positioning.
• The Behavioral Bank Account: Dr. Courtney explains how to avoid "withdrawals" (constant commands) and focus on "deposits" (connection and curiosity).
• Identifying the Signs: What "W-sitting" or the "Vincent’s Curtsy" can tell you about your child’s pelvic floor strength and withholding habits.

1. Constipation is a Stop Sign: You cannot successfully potty train a constipated child. Address the gut health and stool consistency first to avoid creating a cycle of painful pooping and withholding.
2. Language Matters: Swap "Go sit on the potty" for curiosity-based scripts like, "Let’s see what your body is trying to tell you."
3. Model the Cues: Talk out loud about your own body’s signals. "My bladder feels full; I’m going to go listen to my body and use the restroom."
4. Reward the Effort, Not the Result: Use sticker charts for sitting and trying rather than the physical act of peeing or pooping, which a child cannot always control.

• OWN Pediatric Therapy: Annie Close’s practice specializing in pediatric bowel, bladder, and pelvic health. https://www.ownpediatrictherapy.com/
• Integrated Behavioral Health: Dr. Courtney’s group practice in Colorado, offering support for behavioral and developmental hurdles. https://www.integratedbhs.com/
• Connect on Social: Follow us for more tips on raising kids these days! @integratedbh

You don't have to be perfect to be a great parent. We are all learning about how to raise kids these days.

Legal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.