This is Heather's story.

In this deeply honest and encouraging episode, Heather shares her personal journey of living with undiagnosed ADHD for most of her life. From early struggles in childhood to the quiet exhaustion of constantly masking, Heather opens up about the moment things finally began to make sense. Through clarity, kind words, and a faith-filled lens, she began to reframe her story—and in doing so, found hope.

Whether you’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, love someone who has, or simply know what it feels like to wrestle with feeling “too much” or “not enough,” this episode is for you. It’s a powerful reminder that understanding changes everything.

In this episode, we explore: • What it’s like to live with undiagnosed ADHD as an adult • How childhood experiences can shape our inner narratives • The power of kind words and community • Faith as a source of clarity and hope • Tools for reframing identity and embracing your true self

Resources Mentioned:

ADHD is Awesome by Penn & Kim Holderness – Buy the book

1. “Females with ADHD: An Expert Consensus Statement” This article discusses how females with ADHD often exhibit different symptom profiles compared to males, including variations in comorbidity and associated functioning. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7422602/

2. “Gender Differences in Adult ADHD: Cognitive Function Assessed by the Cambridge Neuropsychological Test Automated Battery” This study explores how ADHD manifests differently in adults based on gender, noting that females are more likely to present with inattentive symptoms, while males often display combined symptoms with higher rates of hyperactivity and impulsivity. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7561166/

3. “Miss. Diagnosis: A Systematic Review of ADHD in Adult Women” This systematic review highlights that women with ADHD are often rated as more impaired on various measures of ADHD symptoms and tend to score higher on related rating scales compared to men. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38324203/

4. “How ADHD Differs in Males and Females” This article discusses how females with ADHD may experience more significant subjective impairment than males, with a tendency to report more severe inattention symptoms. It also notes different patterns of comorbidity, with males more likely to have externalizing disorders. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1876201822002039

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One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle?

Someone needs to start the conversation.

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences. Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.