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Have you ever watched a show that unexpectedly cracked your heart open? That's what happened when I watched Netflix's "Forever" - and I'm still processing all the feelings it brought up.

This adaptation of Judy Blume's 1975 novel follows two Black teenagers in 2018 Los Angeles through their experiences of first love. But what struck me most powerfully were the parents - particularly Justin's mother with her protective (sometimes "overbearing") love and his father with his perfect balance of firmness and unconditional acceptance. "You will never lose my love," he tells his son in one pivotal moment, and those words illuminated something I've been missing my entire life.

As someone raised by a white mother with paranoid schizophrenia and an absent Black father who later abused me, watching these functional, loving Black families on screen created an ache of recognition. I found myself wondering what it would have been like to grow up with that protection, that stability, that unconditional love. Not just theoretically, but specifically - what would my life trajectory have looked like with parents who could create safe spaces for me instead of spaces I needed to escape?

This isn't about claiming victimhood or staying stuck in grief. It's about acknowledging our specific wounds so we can heal them. For Black women especially, we're so often expected to be endlessly resilient without acknowledging our pain. But naming our losses matters. And healing happens when we learn to reparent ourselves - offering our inner children the protection, validation, and love they didn't receive.

What helps me most is building community with other Black women, pursuing therapy when needed, and focusing on relationships built on mutual respect rather than just chemistry. I'm learning to create the environment I longed for rather than looking for it elsewhere.

What small act of kindness or protection can you offer your inner child today? Remember - we can become the parents we wished we had, not just for our children, but for ourselves. Share your thoughts in the comments, and don't forget to subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.

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