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Many of us grew up feeling unwanted, like our very being was too much, like our presence took up space that no one wanted to give. Sometimes, it began at home. Sometimes, it was the way our mother looked at us, spoke to us, or ignored us. And slowly, that feeling settled in. A quiet, heavy shame that followed us everywhere.

But a feeling is not a fact.

Carrying the belief that you're a burden makes life heavier. It pushes you away from connection, even when your heart aches for it. That’s why healing begins with truth. You were never too much. You were never the problem. You were a child in need of care, safety, and love. And that love begins with you.

You are not a burden. You are worthy of love, of rest, of joy, and of being known and welcomed. It is never too late to believe that.

In this episode, we talk about feeling like a burden and how it hurts our self-worth. Healing starts when we comfort the little child inside us who felt alone and unwanted. You’ll learn how to love yourself more and find places where you truly belong. Tune in to discover simple steps to feel safe, grow, and shine as your true self.

"Feeling like a burden is a burden. It is a weight that you carry and it makes it impossible for you to show up as your true self."– Jennifer Arnise

Topics Covered:

(00:00:00) Episode Snippet

(00:00:11) Welcome to The Black Mother Wound Podcast

(00:03:06) Acknowledge your lived experience

(00:06:09) The shame of being a burden runs deep

(00:08:00) To my little inner girl: You matter

(00:10:05) Hyper-independence is rooted in fear of not belonging

(00:12:05) How to reset your mindset

(00:14:10) Let yourself be seen, even in small ways

(00:16:23) Nobody can abandon me

(00:18:03) Stop over-performing to earn love

(00:20:33) Your only job is to take care of yourself

(00:22:04) Reparent your inner child

(00:25:17) Not an entitlement, but a healthy self-esteem

(00:26:40) Show up for your inner child consistently

(00:27:07) You deserve all good things

Key Takeaways:

"Your only job is to take care of yourself. It is to go in and lick your wounds and soothe yourself and find the comfort that you deserve."

DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed psychologist, medical doctor, or health care professional and my services do not replace the care of psychologists, doctors or other healthcare professionals. All opinions expressed here are my own. If you feel you are in any danger of harming yourself please call 911. I am not providing health care, medical or nutritional therapy services, or attempting to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure any physical, mental or emotional issue, disease or condition. All opinions are my own and based on my personal lived experience.

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