Birds' Nests: The Hottest Salon in Town! Dental Floss & Hair, Oh My!
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Birds' Nests: The Hottest Salon in Town! Dental Floss & Hair, Oh My!
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About this listen
Have you ever woken up and thought, “Today’s the day I find out something that will change… absolutely nothing about my life?” Because that’s my morning ritual, fueled only by coffee and a burning curiosity for news that’s truly, deeply unnecessary. This morning did not disappoint. I stumbled upon a story so odd, it might just make you question what the word ‘news’ even means.
Let’s get our bearings first. While most of the world is understandably gripped by real news—catastrophic Texas floods, missing campers, and Ozzy Osbourne singing his lungs out in a British stadium—there’s always a corner of the internet where the bizarre flourishes. Now, that’s my patch of wildflowers.
In today’s episode of “Why Is This Even a Headline?” we take a detour from disaster and delve into nature’s very own upcyclers: birds. Specifically, how grassland birds are apparently going full Martha Stewart with modern trash. According to news from the restored Nachusa Grasslands in Illinois, bison are happily roaming—and birds, always the overachievers, have discovered that human hair and old dental floss make for prime nest material. That’s right, while you’re spending money on eco-friendly bedding, there’s a sparrow somewhere lining its nursery with what could very well be the remnants of your last haircut or an overly ambitious piece of unwaxed mint. Somewhere in Illinois, a robin’s nest is about three split-ends away from qualifying as a salon.
Park rangers say these birds weave all sorts of discarded oddities into their nests—string, plastic, hair, the kind of stuff that usually clogs up your vacuum. Imagine the mother bird’s sales pitch: “Sure, Becky, the twigs are classic, but have you tried orthodontic chic? This year, it’s all the rage.” It’s nest couture, and the birds are working the runway, one beakful of debris at a time.
Of course, scientists say this isn’t necessarily a sign of an avian revolution or that birds are preparing to take over the local recycling center. They’re just opportunists, making do with the world we’ve created—one gum-wrapper at a time. Urban ecologists are studying if our trashy habits are helping or hurting the birds. Let’s be real: nothing says “I support nature” quite like finding a blue jay’s nursery lined with last year’s trending dental product.
So, as you brush your hair tonight, pause to appreciate that you might be contributing to a next-generation, high-rise bird condo on the prairie. Next time someone says humans never give back to nature, tell them about the time a goldfinch turned a wad of hair into the Midwest’s hottest real estate.
And that, my friends, is news you most definitely did not need—but now, just try to forget it. I dare you.
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In the spirit of reconciliation, Audible acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect to their elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.