In this energizing conversation, Cynthia meets siblings Denver and Dylan Humphrey, co-founders of the youth nonprofit Fourddo, whose mission is to amplify young voices and build real community. They share how a homeschooled, low-social-media childhood evolved into a joint platform—and then into a hub that connects teens across states with resources, mentors, and each other. The duo explains why they refuse to “be niche”: mental health, civic education, arts, equity, and storytelling all belong in the same room when you’re serving whole human beings. We hear about their Days of Mindfulness campaign, pop-up gatherings that give students a reset through movement, play, and presence—and why simply staying in touch is transformative. Denver and Dylan talk about bridge-building (introductions, DMs, late-night check-ins), making local retreats community-run, and the power of intergenerational listening. Most of all, they model sibling teamwork as a practice of empathy, fluidity, and love. The result is a blueprint for youth leadership that is inclusive, practical, and deeply human.00:00 — What Fourddo Is
04:00 — From Homeschool to Platform

08:00 — Checking In & Staying Connected

12:00 — Campaigns & Days of Mindfulness

16:00 — Safe Spaces, Not Isolation

20:00 — “Not Niche”: Move Freely Across Issues

24:00 — Retreats, Local Partners, & What’s Next

28:01 — Closing: Love, Bridges, and How to Reach Fourddo

In this riveting session, Cynthia Marks and Dr. Loren Weiner unpack masochism as a deep, often invisible style of living driven by unconscious guilt—the felt sense that we “deserve” to suffer or deny ourselves good things. Loren traces the guilt back to Dr. Bernard Bail’s imprint theory: the fetus unconsciously takes on the mother’s unprocessed pain and wrongly concludes, “it’s my fault,” a “first lie” that later fuels self-sabotage, procrastination, and staying in punishing relationships. They show how dreams reveal this pattern—from lost purses and missed deadlines to violent head blows—mapping the original psychic “blast” and the mind’s attempt to wall it off. Cynthia shares personal dreams (like a book titled “Life Is Torture”) that capture resistance to joy and the pull toward old operating manuals. Loren explains how this inner guilt scales up into culture—why groups, institutions, even nations repeatedly choose policies that make everyone suffer. The antidote isn’t moralizing but honest dreamwork, daily self-questioning, and claiming the birthright to love and pleasure. Start inside, they insist; shift the inner operating system and the outer systems begin to change.

• 00:00 — What Is Masochism?

• 07:20 — The First Lie

• 14:40 — Head-Trauma Dreams

• 22:00 — Working the Pattern

• 29:20 — “Life Is Torture”

• 36:40 — Self to Society

• 44:00 — Allowing Love & Pleasure

• 50:49 — Closing Invitation

In this gripping and hope-filled conversation, Cynthia Marks sits down with Adonai Melendez, a Homeboy Industries trainee and reentry advocate, to trace his journey from childhood trauma and gang life to accountability, faith, and service. Adonai describes fleeing civil war, a painful break from his grandmother, and an adolescence that made gangs feel like the only family offering safety and belonging. At 16, he committed a murder; decades in prison followed, where he learned the “politics” of survival, and then, through a searing moment of empathy, began transforming from the inside out. He chose programs, accountability, and love-based action, discovering that giving others power made him truly powerful. Released after nearly 31 years, Adonai rediscovered the world in color, found purpose in community work, and entered Homeboy Industries, where therapy, structure, and dignity anchor his new life. Today he serves people facing homelessness, mental health challenges, and reentry barriers; living proof that we are not defined by our worst act but by what we do next. His message is simple and radical: every person is meant to be loved, and we always have a choice.

00:00 — Homeboy & Purpose: What reentry looks like when it’s love-based08:41 — From El Salvador to LA: Childhood rupture, abuse, and the pull of gangs17:22 — Escalation: Guns, “power,” a murder at 16, arrest, and a life sentence26:03 — Prison Rules: Race politics, riots, fear—and the cost of belonging34:44 — The Turning Point: Seeing the victim’s family and choosing another path43:25 — Programs, Accountability, and Self-Love: Becoming free before release52:06 — Reentry in Action: Campaign work, therapy, school, and Homeboy1:00:47 — Closing: Your trauma is yours—and you’re meant to be loved

In this intimate conversation, host Cynthia Marks turns the mic on herself to share the love story and life lessons behind And Now Love. She recounts meeting psychoanalyst Dr. Bernard Bail at age 92, the dream that foretold their partnership, and how dreamwork helped her peel back imprints and find her true voice. With Dr. Loren Weiner, Cynthia traces Bail’s arc—from WWII POW to paradigm-challenging analyst—showing how his experiences shaped a theory that the “war inside” must be healed to end the wars outside. They reflect on spirit, courage, and why genuine love is action, not lip service. Cynthia offers raw, moving examples of dreams that expose locked-in patterns, and the freedom that comes from naming what love is (and isn’t). The episode also explores Bail’s battles for intellectual openness in psychoanalysis and his insistence on women’s equal place at the table. It’s a tender, candid look at the man, the method, and the marriage that sparked this podcast—and an invitation to look within.

In this gripping episode of "And Now, Love," Cynthia Marks sits down with Owen Hanson, author of The California Kid, to unpack his extraordinary life story. Owen takes listeners on a journey through his transformation from a USC athlete to running a high-stakes underground betting empire. The conversation dives into his struggles with identity, the pursuit of belonging, and the adrenaline-fueled decisions that led him to incarceration. Owen reflects on his time in confinement, his eventual path to self-reform, and his remarkable ability to rebuild his life. This episode offers an unflinching look at the consequences of ambition, the pursuit of redemption, and the lessons that come from finding purpose against all odds.

In this powerful episode of And Now Love, Cynthia Marks speaks with Devi Jags, producer, writer, activist, and host of Sparkle On. Devi shares her journey from being a competitive runner whose identity was wrapped up in athletics to becoming an outspoken advocate for gender-based violence awareness and mental health. She opens up about the traumatic experiences she endured during college, how those shaped her advocacy, and how she transformed her pain into purpose. Together, Cynthia and Devi explore the meaning of “sparkle” — happiness, passion, and self-worth — and how creativity can be a vital force for healing. Devi explains how writing, storytelling, and activism became her new form of expression, and why empowering others to discover their inner sparkle is central to her mission. The conversation touches on the complexities of sexual violence, breaking generational trauma, the importance of listening to young people, and the role of creativity as resistance and renewal. Ultimately, Devi reminds us that love and self-expression are essential tools for resilience.

• 00:00 | Defining Sparkle: From Running to Self-Worth

• 07:00 | College Trauma, Sexual Violence, and Speaking Out

• 14:00 | Transforming Anger into Advocacy and Finding Voice

• 21:00 | Creativity, Writing, and the Power of Story

• 28:00 | Healing, Dreams, and Expressing Trauma Through Art

• 35:00 | Sex Education, Consent, and Rape Culture

• 42:00 | Generational Trauma, Ancestry, and Reclaiming Identity

• 49:00 | The Sparkle Movement, Legacy, and Love as Resistance

In this rare and intimate episode of And Now Love, host Cynthia Marks turns the mic toward the crew behind the camera: Bobby, Ian, Whitley, and Denis — the creative team responsible for bringing the podcast’s message to life visually and emotionally. This isn't just a conversation about production. It’s a reflection on how the mission of And Now Love — with its core focus on healing, emotional imprinting, and generational transformation — has impacted those working to share it with the world.

The team opens up about their own struggles with vulnerability, the tension between authentic storytelling and digital attention spans, and what it means to market a message they themselves are still processing. This episode explores the emotional labor of content creation, the challenge of translating deep ideas into digestible formats, and the surprising ways the show’s message has changed them.

In this follow-up episode of And Now Love, Cynthia Marks continues her conversation with social and criminal justice advocate Niaz Kasravi. Niaz reflects on her path from silence to self-expression — shaped not only by personal trauma, but also by a deepening commitment to justice and community healing. She speaks candidly about the criminal legal system, her work supporting incarcerated individuals, and how trauma has shaped the way we relate to ourselves, to institutions, and to each other. Through a lens that is both compassionate and unflinching, Niaz explores how self-awareness, nervous system literacy, and emotional integrity have guided her advocacy — and her life. This is a conversation about finding your voice, standing up for what matters, and holding space for the truth.