044 - Presence Over Performance: The Journey From Image to Identity cover art

044 - Presence Over Performance: The Journey From Image to Identity

044 - Presence Over Performance: The Journey From Image to Identity

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 What I love about these conversations is that they go beyond surface topics. Beneath each story or update runs a deeper thread of meaning, growth, and awakening. As I reflect on this walk-and-talk recording, here are the insights that stand out most: 29 Years of Marriage, 30 Years Together We celebrated our 29th wedding anniversary without fanfare. I read while Stephanie enjoyed a three-hour nap. Later, we made a Costco run and had burgers and fries for dinner. And you know what? It was perfect. The longer I live, the more I realize that celebration isn't about external performance. It's about the quiet comfort of being fully ourselves with each other. We don't need to "prove" our marriage's depth through elaborate events. Every day filled with laughter, presence, and unconditional love is the celebration itself. 20 Years of Podcasting & A Documented Life In December, we'll mark 20 years since publishing our first podcast. That means two-thirds of our marriage has been captured with microphones nearby. Add to that ten prior years of blogging and journaling, and it's clear: our entire life together has been thoroughly documented. This isn't just about creating content for me. I believe these archives serve as medicine, not just for my own reflection, but for anyone who discovers them and finds something that resonates. It's also amazing to have a sacred record of our journey. Passports & Possibility We also discussed passports. Mine is misplaced, and both of ours have expired. Yet I have this strong feeling that opportunities for travel will emerge once we get them renewed. Renewing our passports feels more like making a declaration than completing paperwork: we are ready for further expansion. It's a simple yet powerful act of faith. Our Eating “Palm” Stephanie and I laughed about a typo that turned "eating plan" into "eating palm." But beneath the humor, this conversation ran deep. Stephanie is beginning a metabolism reset, and I decided to join her. Not because I'm ashamed of my current state, but because I finally feel free to make health choices unconstrained by performance expectations. Years ago, I built an identity around being a "fitness guy." When that identity collapsed during the pandemic, it pushed me into a deeper spiritual awakening. I share more about this journey in the episode. What I've discovered is that my worth isn't tied to weight, diet, or performance. Radical acceptance came first. Now, from that place of peace, I can make choices again, not to silence shame, but simply because I want to. McKenna’s Move Back to Bowling Green Dropping our daughter McKenna off for another year at college was more difficult this time. She felt the separation deeply, and we shared in her emotions. But what I noticed was her growth. She named her emotions. She asked for comfort. And she reframed her own experience in real time, reminding herself she always feels anxious before school starts and that she’ll settle into a groove again. To witness her self-awareness was a powerful reminder: maturity isn’t about never struggling. It’s about knowing you can move through struggle with grace. Free The Dream Workshop Revisiting a recorded conversation with attendees from the April 2023 Free The Dream Workshop rekindled my enthusiasm for the workbooks, frameworks, and core essence of the workshop. For a moment, I had doubted whether the material was “too much” for people from certain backgrounds. But revisiting that recording reminded me: when I share without agenda, the right people always find deep value. I've ordered additional workbooks as we're committed to hosting these gatherings on a regular basis. Whether three people attend or thirty, these workshops provide a sacred space for participants to clear their mental noise, reconnect with their authentic selves, and rediscover what's possible in their lives. Register at FreeTheDreamWorkshop.com Reflections on Taylor Swift We also talked about Taylor Swift’s recent podcast interview with Travis and Jason Kelce. Stephanie loved it. I enjoyed it too, though on reflection I realized how much of it was orchestrated with intentional Easter eggs and messaging. For me, it raised bigger questions: what does it mean to be authentic in public? How do you balance vulnerability with stewardship of influence? It reminded me of my own journey. Even at our much smaller scale, there have been times when our visibility attracted situations that made me pause and ask: How much am I willing to share? The truth is, all of us have personas we bring into the world. Authenticity doesn’t mean abandoning them. It means making sure what we present is in alignment with what is real within us. The Path Forward The thread running through all of these conversations is the same: freedom comes not from performance, but from presence. Whether it’s celebrating a marriage, making health choices, parenting through transitions, hosting a workshop, or reflecting on ...
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