We all want our kids to thrive—not just survive the pressure of school, sports, and life. But let’s be honest, it’s not easy. Too often we fall back into the same old habits, even when we know better. That’s why I was so excited to sit down with two incredible people: my friend and co-author, Dr. Bill Stixrud, and psychologist Dr. Diana Hill. Diana’s new book Wise Effort: How to Focus Your Genius Energy on What Matters Most shows us that our kids—and we parents too—don’t have to choose between doing well and being well.

In this conversation, we dig into what it means to use our energy wisely, how to recognize and nurture “genius energy” in ourselves and our children, and why psychological flexibility might just be the most important skill we can teach and model. If you’ve ever felt like your family is running full speed but not sure you’re heading in the right direction, this episode will speak to you.

Episode Highlights:

[0:00] – Kicking things off: why Bill and I created The Self-Driven Child Workbook
[1:08] – Diana’s story of strawberries, watercolor, and the uniqueness of every child
[2:53] – Introducing my guests: Dr. Bill Stixrud and Dr. Diana Hill
[4:23] – Diana explains ACT and Buddhist principles as foundations for Wise Effort
[6:27] – What “genius energy” really means and why it matters for kids and parents
[9:01] – Helping kids see their strengths beyond grades and sports
[10:10] – Practicing “watering flowers”: appreciating kids for who they are
[13:51] – Bill shares how affirming kids’ strengths changes lives
[16:08] – The three-part framework of Wise Effort: curiosity, openness, and focus
[19:21] – Why psychological flexibility is essential for kids and parents
[22:22] – Pain and values: two sides of the same coin
[24:51] – How values-driven goals outperform standard “SMART” goals
[27:51] – Genius + values = the sweet spot of wise effort
[30:17] – Family chores as a practice of genius and values in action
[32:42] – Making the most of limited time with our kids—before the runway ends
[33:21] – How meaningful activities actually expand our sense of time
[35:11] – A moving story of Daniel, a father with cancer, learning to invest in presence
[37:37] – Final reflections: helping parents and kids feel better and do better

Links & Resources:

https://drdianahill.com/ Wise Effort: How to Focus Your Genius Energy on What Matters Most by Dr. Diana Hill

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