What happens when a woman who grew up immersed in diet culture deliberately chooses to take up more space? In this vulnerable exploration of my journey to gain muscle, I share the unexpected challenges of intentionally becoming bigger in a world that constantly tells women to shrink themselves.

Growing up in the 80s and 90s, I was surrounded by impossible beauty standards—from beach workout videos with glistening bodies to the waif-thin supermodel era. Now, after decades of training and even competing as a bodybuilder, I've discovered that gaining muscle intentionally has been significantly harder than losing body fat ever was, at least for me.

Through this process of "bulking" that began in January 2025, I've uncovered five profound lessons about patience, trust, communication, support networks, and self-compassion. I talk candidly about the discomfort of tight clothes, feeling bloated, force-feeding myself protein, and the mental struggle against deeply ingrained programming. I also share how this journey revealed which relationships in my life truly supported my growth and which ones couldn't survive it.

For women who lift weights but don't see their bodies changing, consider that real transformation might require embracing temporary discomfort—eating more, becoming bigger, and challenging everything you've been taught. You don't get to choose whether what you gain is muscle or fat; you simply have to commit to the process. If you're struggling with similar challenges or considering your own muscle-building journey, reach out through the contact information in the show notes. Your body, your journey, your choice to take up the space you deserve.

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Disclaimer: This show is for education and entertainment purposes only. This is not intended as a replacement for therapy. Please seek out the help of a professional to assist you with your specific situation.