Showing results by author "Terry Pratchett" in All Categories

Never let real life get in the way of a good story, especially when a good story involves three witches, including a fairy godmother, and travelling to a faraway land to make sure that a servant girl doesn't marry a prince. It looks as though a happy ending may be averted before catastrophe strikes. But unfortunately, the forces of good are up against a godmother who has made Destiny an offer it can't refuse.

Shortlisted for the British Book Awards, Children's Book of the Year, 2007.
Tiffany Aching is a trainee witch now working for the seriously scary Miss Treason. But when Tiffany witnesses the Dark Dance, the crossover from summer to winter, she does what no one has ever done before: she leaps into the dance. And into the oldest story there is.

It can take you to the top of the highest mountain or down to the bottom of the deepest depths of the sea. This where it took Doggins on his 'Awfully Big Adventure': a quest full of magic and flying machines. (And the world’s best joke - trust me, it’s hilarious.) It took three young inventors to the moon (where they may or may not have left a bottle of lemonade) and a caveman on a trip to the dentist. You can join them on these adventures, and many more, in this incredible collection of stories....

A real witch never casually steps out of her body, leaving it empty. Eleven-year-old Tiffany Aching does. And there's something just waiting for a handy body to take over. Something ancient and horrible and that can't die. Tiffany returns in this exciting new adventure, helped as before by the Nac Mac Feegle - the rowdiest, toughest, smelliest bunch of fairies ever to be thrown out of Fairyland for being drunk at two in the afternoon. They'll fight anything!

When a large, heavily fortified and armoured empire makes a faintly menacing request of a much smaller, infinitely more cowardly neighbour, it would be churlish, if not extremely dangerous, not to comply; particularly if all they want is a wizard, and they don't specify whether competence is an issue.

Religion is a controversial business in the Discworld. Everyone has their own opinion, and indeed their own gods - who come in all shapes and sizes. In such a competitive environment, there is a pressing need to make one's presence felt. And it's certainly not remotely helpful to be reduced to be appearing in the form of a tortoise, a manifestation far below god-like status in anyone's book. In such instances, you need an acolyte, and fast - preferably one who won't ask too many questions.

This isn't real life. This isn't even cheese mongering. It's opera - where the music matters, and where an opera house is being terrorised by a man in evening dress with a white mask, lurking in the shadows, occasionally killing people, and, most worryingly, sending little notes, writing maniacal laughter with five exclamation marks. Opera can do that to a man. In such circumstances, life has obviously reached that desperate point where the wrong thing to do has to be the right thing to do.

It's the night before Hogswatch. And it's too quiet. It's the night before Hogswatch. There's snow, there are robins, there are trees covered with decorations, but there's a notable lack of the big fat man who delivers the toys. He's gone. Susan the governess has got to find him before morning; otherwise, the sun won't rise. And unfortunately, her only helpers are a raven with an eyeball fixation, the Death of Rats, and an "oh god of hangovers".

A man with no eyes. No eyes at all. Two tunnels in his head . . .It’s not easy being a witch, and it’s certainly not all whizzing about on broomsticks, but Tiffany Aching – teen witch – is doing her best.Until something evil wakes up, something that stirs up all the old stories about nasty old witches, so that just wearing a pointy hat suddenly seems a very bad idea.Worse still, this evil ghost from the past is hunting down one witch in particular.

Somewhere in a place so far up there is no down, a ship is waiting to take the nomes home: back to wherever they came from. And one nome, Masklin, knows that they've got to try and contact this ship. It means getting to Florida (wherever that is), then getting to the launch of a communications satellite (whatever that is). A ridiculous plan. Impossible. But Masklin doesn't know this, so he tries to do it anyway.

Eric is the Discworld's only demonology hacker. Pity he's not very good at it. All he wants is his three wishes granted. Nothing fancy: to be immortal, to rule the world, and have the most beautiful woman in the world fall madly in love with him. The usual stuff. But instead of a tractable demon, Eric calls up Rincewind, the most incompetent wizard in the universe, and his extremely intractable and hostile travel accessory, the Luggage.

Random House presents the audiobook edition of Father Christmas's Fake Beard by Terry Pratchett, read by Julian Rhind-Tutt. Have you ever wanted Christmas to be different? Turkey and carols, presents and crackers - they all start to feel a bit...samey. How about a huge exploding mince pie, a pet abominable snowman, or a very helpful partridge in a pear tree? What if Father Christmas went to work at a zoo, or caused chaos in a toy store, or was even arrested for burglary!

Sir Terry Pratchett was a much-loved writer who gained international fame for his Discworld fantasy series. In this recording we hear—in his own words—about science-fantasy and comedy writing. He discusses his fans and followers, how he enjoys writing and the importance of the Discworld characters. We hear his thoughts on fame and isolation, his attitude to money and about his reaction to diagnosis with early-onset Alzheimer's disease.

In the beginning, there was nothing but endless flatness. Then came the Carpet. That's the old story everyone knows and loves (even if they don't really believe it). But now the Carpet is home to many different tribes and peoples, and there's a new story in the making: the story of Fray, sweeping a trail of destruction across the Carpet, the story of power-hungry mouls, and the story of two Munrung brothers, who set out on an adventure to end all adventures when their village is flattened.

Maurice, an amazing cat who has survived four years on the toughest streets in the whole of the Discworld, reckons that rats are dumb - clever, OK, but dumb. Maurice, however, is smart, smart enough to recognize that there's a new kind of rat around: rats who have been eating wizards' rubbish and can now talk. Smart enough to get a pretty amazing idea when he spots a stupid-looking kid playing the flute....Now Maurice has his very own "plague of rats" and his own Pied Piper.

To the thousands of tiny nomes who live under the floorboards of a large department store, there is no Outside. Things like Day and Night, Sun and Rain are just daft old legends. Then a devastating piece of news shatters their existence: the Store, their whole world, is to be demolished. And it's up to Masklin, one of the last nomes to come into the Store, to mastermind an unbelievable escape plan that will take all the nomes into the dangers of the great Outside.

A Bright New Dawn is just around the corner for thousands of tiny nomes when they begin to move into the ruined buildings of an abandoned quarry. Or is it? Soon strange things start to happen. Like the tops of puddles growing hard and cold, and the water coming down from the sky in frozen bits. Then humans appear and they really mess everything up. But how long will the nomes be able to keep the humans at bay: even with the help of the monster Jekub? A hilarious sequel to Truckers.

As the mighty alien fleet from the very latest computer game thunders across the computer screen, Johnny prepares to blow them into the usual million pieces. And they send him a message. We surrender. They're not supposed to do that! They're supposed to die. And computer joysticks don't have "Don't Fire" buttons...It's hard enough trying to save Mankind from the Galactic Hordes. It's even harder trying to save the Galactic Hordes from Mankind. But it's only a game, isn't it. Isn't it?

Die Scheibenwelt dreht sich mit der Geschwindigkeit eines brillanten Comedy-Hörbuchs: Die Scheibenwelt ist wieder da, mit dem nächsten unglaublichen Abenteuer in der Stadt Ankh-Morpork, auf dem Planeten, der so flach ist wie eine Pizza und auf den Rücken von 4 Elefanten ruht. Diesmal geht es um die Erfindung der Presse, um das Thema: Die Wahrheit und nichts als die Wahrheit und die Schwierigkeiten, die man als Zeitungsmacher mit Wahrheitsfindung und -vermittlung haben kann.

Deep in the Chalk, something is stirring. The owls and the foxes can sense it, and Tiffany Aching feels it in her boots. An old enemy is gathering strength. This is a time of endings and beginnings, old friends and new, a blurring of edges and a shifting of power. Now Tiffany stands between the light and the dark, the good and the bad. As the fairy horde prepares for invasion, Tiffany must summon all the witches to stand with her. To protect the land. Her land. There will be a reckoning.