Showing results by publisher "-emdashery books-" in Comedy & Humour

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a policeman taking a holiday would barely have had time to open his suitcase before he finds his first corpse. Commander Sam Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch is on holiday in the pleasant and innocent countryside, but not for him a mere body in the wardrobe. There are many, many bodies - and an ancient crime more terrible than murder. He is out of his jurisdiction, out of his depth, out of bacon sandwiches; and out of his mind. But never out of guile. Where there is a crime there must be a punishment.

Meet Clare Barker, the social worker who likes nothing more than sorting out other people's problems (while failing to deal with her own). Wracked with guilt over being white, middle-class and heterosexual, she has a dedicated social conscience (unless it's inconvenient for her) and lives to interfere in other people's lives—both on a personal and professional basis. Bearing the brunt of her control freakery and lack of self-awareness are her family, colleagues and long-suffering teacher partner, Brian—all of whom have their own frustrations, disappointments and dramas.

There is a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. It’s not an easy thing to do and Arthur Dent thinks he’s the only human who’s been able to master this nifty little trick - until he meets Fenchurch, the girl of his dreams. Fenchurch knows how the world could be made a good and happy place. Unfortunately she’s forgotten. Convinced that the secret lies within God’s Final Message to His Creation they go in search of it. And in a dramatic break with tradition - actually find it....

It’s 2041. The Earth is under the control of the benevolent ‘Corporation’ and time travel is not only possible but affordable for the common worker drone - sorry, person! Free with the purchase of the Timeslide 9000 machine, The Time Traveller’s Guide to Not Dying is an audio instruction manual designed to help owners choose which exciting historical moments to visit. It teaches them about where they’re going, who they will meet, and what to eat.

The brilliant new novel from the Orange Prize-winning author of We Need to Talk About Kevin centres on three generations of the Mandible family as a fiscal crisis hits a near-future America. It is 2029. The Mandibles have been counting on a sizable fortune filtering down when their 97-year-old patriarch dies. Yet America's soaring national debt has grown so enormous that it can never be repaid. Under siege from an upstart international currency, the dollar is in meltdown.

Ishmael Jones and his partner Penny have been despatched to assist a group of scientists who are investigating a mysterious black hole which has appeared on a Somerset hillside. Could it really be a doorway to another dimension, an opening into another world? When one of the scientists disappears into the hole - with fatal consequences - Ishmael must prove whether it was an accident - or murder. But with no clues, no witnesses, and no apparent motive, he has little to go on. Is there an alien predator at large, or is an all-too-human killer responsible?

Penelope Keith stars in the much-loved sitcom about an aristocrat forced to part with her family home. When her husband's death leaves her financially strapped, Audrey Fforbes-Hamilton has no choice but to sell her beloved Grantleigh Estate. With butler Brabinger in tow, she decamps to the tiny Old Lodge cottage, where she keeps a close - and disapproving - eye on the new squire: the nouveau riche Richard DeVere, a wholesale food magnate of Czech descent.

Becky thought being married to Luke Brandon would be one big Tiffany box of happiness. But to be honest, it's not quite as dreamy as she'd hoped. The trouble started on honeymoon, when she told Luke the tiniest little fib, about the teeniest little purchase. Now she's on a strict budget, she doesn't have a job — and worst of all her beloved Suze has a new best friend. Then she receives some incredible news. She has a long-lost sister!

In a small town in Sweden it appears to be an ordinary day. But look more closely, and you'll see a mysterious masked figure approaching a bank. Two hours later, chaos has descended. A bungled attempted robbery has developed into a hostage situation - and the offender is refusing to communicate their demands to the police. Inside the building, fear quickly turns to irritation for the seven strangers trapped inside. But as the minutes tick by, they begin to suspect that the criminal mastermind holding them hostage might be more in need of rescuing than they are.

It’s almost Mummy’s 50th birthday. The hot flushes have just started, and nowadays she barely recognises herself. She’s been a wife and mother for so long that she can’t quite remember what life was like pre-moppets (although they’re more like giants now). Speaking of, Jane is constantly partying and naturally more interested in passing her driving test than her A-Levels. In fact, trying to get the kids through their exams at all is almost as excruciating as waiting for their results.

Where there's smoke, there's fire - and no one knows this better than New Jersey bounty hunter Stephanie Plum. The bail bonds office has burned to the ground, and bodies are turning up in the empty construction lot. To make matters worse, Stephanie is working out of a motorhome she shares with a dancing bear, and Joe Morelli's old world grandmother has declared a vendetta against her.

Judith Lucy was just great! Sure, the last remaining member of her immediate family had died, she was menopausal, she suspected her career was in the shitter and it seemed like the world was going to hell in a handbasket—but she was about to move in with the love of her life! Everything would work out because SHE HAD A MAN. Then, in the space of twenty-four hours, her relationship came apart and so did she.

I am a half-arser. A shave-one-legger. A rinse-the-plates-and-tell-myself-any-residual-dirt-will-improve-my-immune-system-er. And yet, I still want to live better, improve my relationships, build a career, enjoy hobbies, have ethics, and live a full, passionate, varied life. And it's possible. This book will teach you to harness the power of half-arsedness to improve the things you actually care about improving, without expending more than you have to give. It's not going to turn you into a superhuman, but it will help you feel more human.

A decade ago, Caitlin Moran thought she had it all figured out. Her instant bestseller How to Be a Woman was a game-changing take on feminism, the patriarchy and the general ‘hoo-ha’ of becoming a woman. Back then, she firmly believed ‘the difficult bit’ was over and her 40s were going to be a doddle. If only she had known: when middle age arrives, a whole new bunch of tough questions need answering.

Are You Being Served? was a comedy juggernaut, running for 10 series between 1973 and 1985 and often attracting audiences of over 20 million. A family favourite, it was a fun-packed mix of double entendres, slapstick and larger-than-life characters – including cat-loving Mrs Slocombe and camp menswear assistant Mr Humphries, with his famous catchphrase, ‘I’m free’!

Everyone in Orange County’s Little Saigon knew that the Duong sisters were cursed. Their ancestor Oanh dared to leave her marriage for true love—and was cursed for it: her descendants are doomed never to find love or happiness, and to give birth only to daughters, never sons.​ Oanh’s current descendant Mai Nguyen knows this curse well. She’s divorced, and after an explosive disagreement a decade ago, she’s estranged from her younger sisters, Minh Pham (the middle and the mediator) and Khuyen Lam.

The in-crowd wears Gucci, but one girl wears her heart on her sleeve. When a chance meeting propels Bette into a new role as a party planner, she can hardly believe her luck. A job that pays you to party! Running with the cool Manhattan pack, gaining VIP access to the city's hottest spots, and meeting "everyone worth knowing" is a million miles away from the number-crunching and paper-pushing of her old banking job. Overnight, the greatest city in the world has become her sexy, late-night playground.

For as long as she can remember, Belle has been insidiously obsessed with her skin and skincare videos. When her estranged mother Noelle mysteriously dies, Belle finds herself back in Southern California, grappling with lingering questions about her death. The stakes escalate when a strange woman in red appears at the funeral, offering a tantalizing clue about her mother’s demise, followed by a cryptic video about a transformative spa experience. With the help of a pair of red shoes, Belle is lured into the barbed embrace of the same lavish culty spa her mother to which her mother was devoted.

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