Improving your conflict skills isn’t about finding the perfect words—it’s about understanding why conflict feels so hard in the first place. When your body believes that speaking up could cost you connection, of course it freezes, softens, or stays quiet. In this episode, I talk about how our nervous systems learned early on that conflict wasn’t safe, and why that doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. When we slow down and get curious about our conflict response rather than judging it, that’s when real change becomes possible, and you can actually get good at conflict. Here’s what I cover:

• How shifting from “what’s wrong with me?” to “why does this make sense?” helps eliminate the self-criticism spiral
• The early lessons your body learned about conflict, compliance, and staying connected
• How people-pleasing and staying small function as intelligent survival strategies
• The questions I offer to help you look backward and make sense of your conflict response
• How attachment patterns shape what your body expects will happen when conflict threatens connection
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Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

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What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

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We are living through an incredibly intense political, social, and cultural moment, and it’s easy to fall into the despair and overwhelm of it all. In this episode, I’m sharing a framework that helps me make sense of what's happening and hold onto hope. Spiral dynamics explains how humans organize around shared value systems, and what happens when those systems collide and begin to collapse. While these transitions are often destabilizing and painful, what we’re living through is not random–and understanding the pattern offers the reminder that how we choose to show up, care for ourselves, and embody the values we want to see matters. Here’s what I cover:

• The origin of spiral dynamics and how the framework can show up in everyday life
• Why systems resist evolution with the same fear and violence they were established with
• How the framework of spiral dynamics relates to good girl rules and people-pleasing tendencies
• Why nervous system safety and connection matter alongside protest, organizing, and action during times of change
• How rest, pleasure, joy, and community are not distractions, but essential tools for surviving times of massive transition

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult

Is your social media feed overflowing with New Year’s resolutions and tips to optimize your life? This mindset can feel overwhelming, so instead of pushing for the “perfect” 2026, I’m offering something else in this episode: five questions I return to again and again to recalibrate my relationship with myself. These questions aren’t about productivity or self-improvement. They’re an invitation to unlearn good girl conditioning, step out of self-abandonment, and choose a way of living that actually feels like yours. Here’s what I cover:

• How women’s socialization continues to shape our choices and behaviors
• What passivity actually looks like when your desires and preferences go unspoken
• Why overworking isn’t just physical labor, but emotional, relational, and mental labor too
• How self-abandonment is at the core of people pleasing and putting yourself last
• Why joy, fun, and play can be nourishment instead of something you earn after work

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!