I sit down with former detective, husband and dad Jason Blackbourn for a raw, incredibly human conversation about what happens when you've spent years witnessing trauma, studying human behaviour and operating in environments where being alert to danger is part of the job. This isn't just a conversation about Jason the detective. It's about Jason the human being when the uniform came off.

Jason speaks openly about his own experience of PTSD, anxiety, panic attacks, nightmares, brain fog and living in a constant state of alert and what happened when the pace finally slowed down and his body and mind began processing everything they had carried.

We talk about treatment, medication, asking for help and the particular challenges emergency service workers can face when the culture around them has historically rewarded being strong, getting on with the job and keeping things to yourself.

Then the conversation shifts....

We talk about domestic violence, coercive control, stalking, manipulation, jealousy, isolation, monitoring, financial control and the behaviours that can begin long before physical violence ever occurs. Jason explains why investigators don't necessarily look at one isolated incident they look for patterns.

I also share some of my own lived experience of domestic violence in this episode, alongside what I now see from the other chair as a therapist.

We talk about why intelligent, capable people can still miss red flags. Why we people please. Why we rationalise behaviour. Why we doubt ourselves. Why leaving isn't always simple. Why someone's reaction when they begin losing control can be an incredibly important time to think about safety.

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