Ever catch yourself feeling a tiny internal “ugh” when someone else is winning? That subtle discomfort, that micro-flinch, that quiet comparison you pretend isn’t happening? Yeah… that’s what we’re talking about today. And listen—feeling envy doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you human.

In this episode, we’re breaking down the real psychology behind comparison, envy, and hater energy, and why your brain literally defaults to stacking your life against other people. Most people spiral without even realizing it—meanwhile, their energy, creativity, and confidence are quietly being drained.

I’ll share a moment where I slipped into that energy (yes, even me), how I caught it, and what actually helped me shift out of comparison and back into main-character energy. Then we’re looking at what envy really is—a signal, not a villain—and how turning it into intel transforms your self-worth, creative flow, and emotional peace.

You’ll learn:

• why comparison feels so automatic
• the difference between envy and desire
• how social media hijacks your nervous system
• how to flip jealousy into motivation
• the emotional and creative cost of hater energy
• and the mindset shifts that actually work

Plus, practical tools you can start using today to rewire your reactions, celebrate others without shrinking yourself, and step into the version of you that claps loudly—for them and for yourself.

Because the truth is simple: you don’t need someone else to lose in order to win. And when you learn to turn envy into information instead of insecurity, everything opens up.

Sometimes the kindest thing you can do… is be real.

If you’ve ever felt a tiny nudge to write your story but immediately told yourself, “No one cares,” “My life isn’t interesting,” or “I wouldn’t even know where to start”… this episode is going to meet you right where you are.

In this week’s episode of I Mean This In The Nicest Way Possible, RAM makes a heartfelt — and slightly confrontational — case for one of the most unexpectedly healing things you can do for yourself: write the f—ing memoir.

And he doesn’t mean: quit your job, move to a cabin, and try to become the next great American author.
He means: pick up a pen and finally get honest with yourself.

This episode explores why writing your story isn’t about publishing, prestige, or perfection — it’s about meaning. It’s about clarity. It’s about reclaiming the pieces of your past that shaped you, and discovering what those moments have been trying to teach you.

You’ll hear about:
• Why storytelling calms your nervous system and rewires emotional memory
• How writing creates psychological integration and identity clarity
• Why your past feels different when you see it on the page instead of replaying it in your head
• How memoir becomes emotional excavation — and why that’s a good thing
• Why your “ordinary” story is more universal than you think

RAM shares his own unexpected entry into memoir writing — from a few casual childhood memories that cracked something open, to the writing class that reshaped his craft, to the emotional breakthroughs that only surfaced when he finally put his truth on paper. And he breaks down real-life examples from memoirists, therapists, psychologists, and storytellers whose lives changed the moment they wrote things down.

You’ll also learn:
• What neuroscience says about expressive writing
• How structure, scenes, themes, and fragments all serve different emotional purposes
• Why community and accountability make your writing stronger
• How writing groups become creative lifelines
• Why waiting “until you’re ready” is the biggest trap

And yes — there’s a challenge this week: The Past to Paper Challenge, a simple one-page practice designed to help you meet a memory with compassion, curiosity, and courage.

This isn’t about becoming an author.
This is about becoming whole.

If you’ve got 27 minutes, RAM means this in the nicest way possible: write the f—ing memoir.
Your future self might just thank you.

If you’ve ever cringed at the word “networking,” avoided events like the plague, or told yourself you’re “just not that kind of person”… this episode is for you.

In this episode of I Mean This In The Nicest Way Possible, RAM takes on the uncomfortable truth at the heart of most success stories: at some point, you have to put yourself out there. Not in a sleazy, performative way — but in a strategic, self-honoring, “I actually believe in what I bring to the table” way.

This week, RAM breaks down why hiding in your cozy little bubble is not protecting you — it’s quietly shrinking your life. Through psychology, real-world examples, and his own stories, he reframes “whoring yourself out” as what it really is: being visible, building community, and letting people see what you’re capable of.

You’ll hear about:

• The mere-exposure effect — why showing up regularly makes people trust and remember you
• Social capital and how relationships quietly multiply your opportunities
• Why action builds confidence (not the other way around)
• The brutal reality that talent doesn’t matter if no one can see you
• How isolation chips away at your identity, resilience, and sense of possibility

Then RAM dives into the stories that bring it all to life:
• Kesha driving to Prince’s house and shamelessly dropping off her demo like a legend in training
• Issa Rae’s philosophy of “network across, not up” — building sideways with peers instead of waiting for gatekeepers
• The Arizona work trip that turned a casual lunch invite into one of his closest, most life-shaping friendships

From there, he gets honest about what happens when you don’t put yourself out there — the missed opportunities, the “invisible jobs” you never hear about, and the way your world slowly stops expanding when you decide you’re “better off alone.”

And because this show is about action, not just awareness, RAM shares what’s working for him right now:
• Intentional networking — reaching out to people he admires even when it feels awkward
• Leading with value instead of desperation or performance
• Moving his brand forward visibly instead of quietly hoping to be discovered
• Following intuitive nudges that say “reach out now” instead of letting fear drive the car

Finally, he introduces The Shameless Ask Rule™ — a simple, weekly practice where you make one bold ask: a DM, an email, a follow-up, an introduction, a pitch. Nothing wild, nothing forced — just one real move that nudges you closer to the life you actually want.

This episode isn’t about selling your soul.
It’s about showing your worth.
It’s about remembering that your next breakthrough is almost always tied to a person — and that staying invisible doesn’t make you humble, it just makes you overlooked.

If you’ve got 25 minutes, RAM means this in the nicest way possible: it’s okay to whore yourself out — strategically, shamelessly, and in full alignment with who you really are.