a sneak peak of our newest patreon episode - featuring undelivered mail, a slew of world flags, and the Mother Queen herself. Subscribe to our Patreon to listen to full exclusive monthly special episodes, as well as other bonus content!

A biblical story....with a few alterations. Thanks for listening to Season 5!! We'll be back for Season 6 this summer....stay tuned....

(1996 - 2024) Gina Tunis, prankster and software savant, died yesterday in the waste of her own making. Known mainly as the only non-b*tch daughter to two Swedish parents, Tunis went through the world in full throttle attack mode: hiring unqualified people who were fun, avoiding a criminal record, and disrespecting parking lot spots with cows. Alongside her two friends Shawnie and Dave, Tunis attempted to form a trio and build the first meaningful relationships of her life at the time of her death. She will be remembered by her boss who she wanted to kill, and the pranks she executed during the course of her short life - arsonists all over town will burn down domiciles as tribute to her life tomorrow night. SEASON FINALE NEXT THURSDAY.

(1994 - 2024) Tannen Baum, heir to the Baum Swamp Water Dynasty from Prussia, died last night in front of a Prussian militia while wearing his beautiful purple ermine robe. Baum, known for his Vermont morality and for resurrecting his family's semi-defunct swamp water company, left no stone unturned in his pursuit of spreading Prussian nationalism. Despite turning the National and State Park Ranger System into a breeding ground for his new swamp water empire, he will be remembered fondly by Park Ranger Michaels, Park Ranger Michaels' son, and the greater community of Danville VT. Tannen Baum's funeral will be livestreamed during the 6:30pm national TV slot of Nightly News with Prussian Holt and Prussian Williams. New episode Thursday!

(2006 - 2024) Miami Wednesday, one of the last high schoolers from Schenoodle, Ohio, passed away last night far from home. Famed for being the only teenager in Schenoodle, Ohio to smoke pot, Miami was born destined to be in Boston, struggling for the whole of her short life to get to the East Coast. Despite her fascination with hair and makeup, Miami was trapped by both the pastoral confines of rural Ohio, and the shadow of her wig-smelling brother Kevin. She will be remembered for her persistence, her love of leprechauns, and her abrasive curse words. You can read her funeral via Stenographer's transcript sometime later this week. New episode Thursday!

a sneak peak of our new patreon episode. this episode is an original demo we recorded while developing the podcast in 2020...with the role of God and Devil flipped...and a hilarious performance by former guest Sam Myers. You can catch Sam's new play THE VICKY ARCHIVES at The Tank from April 18th - May 18th!

(1999 - 2024) Patricia Avocado, semi-famous YouTuber and "man on the street", passed away last night in front of her almost 1000 family members and a few crusted pieces of frozen Stouffers Mac n' Cheese. Despite wandering around grad schools for years, Avocado was a self-taught filmmaker and interviewer known for her quick wit and totally unrelated questions. She will be remembered for proving the famous Dr. Peanut theory that everyone is related to an Avocado, and her ex-girlfriend will be churning colonial butter in Williamsburg to commemorate Patricia's death. New episodes every Thursday!

( ∞ - ∞+73) Noah, the dude from the Ark, passed away like 5 millennia ago after marrying off every single potential species of animal in semi-alphabetical order. Known as an acquaintance then a work friend then as a friend-friend to God, Noah spent his life searching for connections with men his age. Despite a robust social life playing Olde Rugby, Noah often felt alone and abandoned by his peers - seeking comfort and solace at home with his wife and three sons, all of which have names. You can read more about Noah in the Bible, or on Wikipedia, or anywhere other than this podcast, really. New Episodes Every Thursday!!