• Classic Replay: Unlocking the Harmony Triads
    Aug 27 2025

    Today we’re revisiting a deep-dive conversation from our Enneagram U days, all about the Harmony Triads.

    Damon and Kelly unpack this advanced Enneagram teaching, showing how each triad (3-6-9, 2-5-8, and 1-4-7) holds a unique way of experiencing the world through head, heart, and gut. You’ll hear the humor, real-life tangents, and even Damon’s skepticism as Kelly explains why the triads matter, what each number has “lost,” and how these insights can become transformative rather than just prescriptive.

    If you’ve ever wondered how to move beyond surface-level Enneagram knowledge into richer growth and connection, this episode is for you.


    You’ll learn:

    • What the three Harmony Triads are (3-6-9, 2-5-8, and 1-4-7).
    • Why each number in the triads has “lost” something important and how that shapes their struggles.
    • How Threes, Sixes, and Nines help us thrive in everyday life.
    • Why Twos, Fives, and Eights wrestle with rejection and how they seek power in relationships.
    • How Ones, Fours, and Sevens long for the ideal world, and how frustration shapes their journey.
    • The difference between prescriptive Enneagram teachings and the more transformative work of the triads.
    • Why embracing frustration and noticing what’s lost is part of real growth.

    Whether this is your first exposure to Harmony Triads or you’re an Enneagram 401 student, you’ll walk away with practical insights, a few laughs, and plenty to process.

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    23 mins
  • Classic Replay: What Really Motivates Each Enneagram Type
    Aug 20 2025

    While we take a short break from our Lost in Translation series, we’re re-releasing one of our most loved episodes: Motivations.

    In this conversation, Damon and Kelly lay the foundation for understanding the Enneagram by exploring what truly motivates each type. It’s not just what you do that defines your number...it’s why you do it. From the One’s drive to do what’s right, to the Nine’s longing for peace, this episode helps you see what’s beneath the surface of your own personality and those around you.

    Whether you’re new to the Enneagram or just need a refresher, this replay will help you listen with fresh ears and new insight.

    In this episode of Beyond Your Number (recorded under our earlier name, Enneagram U), Damon and Kelly dig into the motivations behind each Enneagram type.

    You’ll learn:

    • Why the Enneagram is more about why than what you do.
    • How each number’s motivation shapes their choices, strengths, and struggles.
    • The difference between healthy and unhealthy motivations.
    • How to spot your own underlying drive by paying attention to time, energy, and patterns.
    • Why awareness of your “dark side” motivation helps keep you balanced.

    This is a foundational conversation that still resonates, and it’s a perfect refresher as we continue forward with Lost in Translation in a few weeks.

    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enneagramu/id1691530997

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    https://open.spotify.com/show/2kbIVeByJn4WDoN3kFlUId?si=65a99542c46a49fa

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    21 mins
  • Lost in Translation: How to Speak So a Type 1 Truly Hears You
    Aug 13 2025

    We’re kicking off our new Lost in Translation series, all about how what you say isn’t always what the other person hears.

    This week, we focus on Enneagram Type 1: what they hear, why it happens, and how to speak in a way that builds connection instead of frustration. Learn the hooks that trigger them, better ways to phrase your thoughts, and how curiosity can soften their inner critic.

    You’ll learn:

    • The common “hooks” that trigger Type 1s (and why phrases like “It’s not a big deal” can be landmines).
    • The deeper reasons Type 1s misinterpret certain messages.
    • Practical phrases to use that validate their passion and preserve the relationship.
    • How curiosity can help soften their inner critic and lead to better mutual understanding.
    • Why both speakers and listeners share responsibility in keeping communication clear.

    Whether you’re a Type 1, live with one, or work alongside one, this conversation will help you avoid getting lost in translation.

    Next Week: We explore Type 2 in our Lost in Translation series.

    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
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    25 mins
  • Speaking vs. Listening: The Roles That Make or Break Conflict Conversations
    Aug 7 2025

    Ever tried to resolve a conflict only to end up in a verbal boxing match? This week, Damon and Kelly wrap up their 4-part conflict series by exploring the critical roles of speaker and listener, and why most of us play both badly.

    You’ll learn how to:

    • Take turns (like, really take turns)
    • Use “I” statements without sounding cheesy
    • Avoid emotional ambushes and “speaker-in-waiting” mode
    • Create safety and clarity when emotions are running high
    • Ask better questions like “What are you feeling?” or “Tell me more”

    With humor, practical tools, and a little awkward role play (yes, Damon actually stayed quiet), this episode will give you real-world strategies to handle conflict constructively.

    Next week kicks off our brand new series Lost in Translation, where we dive into how each Enneagram type hears what you say, and what they think you meant.

    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enneagramu/id1691530997

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    https://open.spotify.com/show/2kbIVeByJn4WDoN3kFlUId?si=65a99542c46a49fa

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    36 mins
  • The Self-Regulation Path: How to Calm Down Before Conflict Blows Up
    Jul 30 2025

    This episode is the third in our conflict mini-series, if you missed the last two, definitely go back and catch them! Two weeks ago, we walked through six steps for healthy conflict. Last week, we hit the self-sabotage pitfalls that derail it. And this week? We're laying out a step-by-step path for self-regulation, the actual work you can do before the conversation even begins.

    Whether it's naming that you're triggered, taking 20 minutes to calm your brain, or journaling out what you really feel (instead of reacting from anger), this episode gives you a clear, practical roadmap. Conflict doesn't have to be chaotic and knowing your number just helps you navigate it better.

    Oh, and yes... Scott’s Tots comes up. You’ve been warned.

    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enneagramu/id1691530997

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    https://open.spotify.com/show/2kbIVeByJn4WDoN3kFlUId?si=65a99542c46a49fa

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    25 mins
  • What Gets in the Way of Healthy Conflict (And How to Spot It)
    Jul 23 2025

    Last week, we laid out a six-step process for navigating conflict, but let’s be honest, sometimes the real struggle is what happens before the steps even start. In this follow-up episode, Damon and Kelly unpack the emotional landmines that often sabotage our best intentions in conflict.

    From blame to emotional avoidance, they explore five self-sabotage traps and how each Enneagram type might fall into them. Whether you're a Nine trying to keep the peace, a One trying to make it right, or a Four deep in your feelings, this episode will help you recognize what’s getting in the way, and why it matters.

    Stay tuned next week for the follow-up: how to move toward emotional self-regulation when conflict arises.

    • The five emotional traps that sabotage healthy conflict
    • How your Enneagram number may fall into specific pitfalls
    • Why “blame” is emotionally satisfying — and what it costs you
    • The subtle ways we numb, bury, or get stuck in unhealthy patterns
    • How recognizing self-sabotage is the first step toward change


    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enneagramu/id1691530997

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    https://open.spotify.com/show/2kbIVeByJn4WDoN3kFlUId?si=65a99542c46a49fa

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    27 mins
  • Constructive Conflict: Turning Differences into Connection
    Jul 16 2025

    Conflict doesn’t have to mean shouting matches or broken relationships.

    This week on Beyond Your Number, Damon and Kelly dive into a topic that touches every relationship—conflict. They unpack how different Enneagram numbers experience disagreements, why some avoid it while others charge in, and how even small differences in opinion can feel like big battles for certain types.

    Kelly shares a practical six-step roadmap for moving from destructive arguments to healthy, constructive conflict—including tips on picking the right time and place (hint: maybe skip the bedroom), why driving or walking might help guys talk, and how simply being heard can sometimes be enough resolution.

    Whether you’re passive, aggressive, or somewhere in between, this episode is packed with tools to help you navigate disagreements without losing your voice—or blowing up bridges.


    1. Set a time and place for discussion
    2. Name the issue (on your own)
    3. Explore possible solutions (on your own)
    4. Discuss perspectives and solutions together
    5. Choose a resolution together
    6. Set a time and place to evaluate

    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
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    https://open.spotify.com/show/2kbIVeByJn4WDoN3kFlUId?si=65a99542c46a49fa

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    27 mins
  • How to Speak a Type 9’s Language (And Why “Sure” Isn’t Always Yes)
    Jul 9 2025

    We’ve made it to the end of our Enneagram communication series—and it’s Damon’s turn in the hot seat as we talk all things Type 9!

    In this episode, Damon wrestles with “Nine doubt,” shares why he’s skeptical about gentle communication styles, and admits he might be a secret One. Kelly unpacks what truly drives the Peacemaker’s calm exterior, and why the word “sure” doesn’t always mean agreement.

    Together, they explore how Nines communicate, how to draw out their hidden opinions, and the lifelong challenge of choosing between peacekeeping and peacemaking. It’s equal parts insight and laughs—and a perfect wrap-up to this series!

    • Damon confesses his “Nine doubt” (and wonders if he’s really a One)
    • What “sure” actually means when a Nine says it
    • The difference between peacemaking and peacekeeping
    • Why decisions—even small ones—feel like conflict to Nines
    • How Nines can practice healthy conflict and assertiveness
    • Journaling, Netflix, and Damon
    • Kelly’s tips for drawing out a Nine’s true thoughts and feelings
    • The hilarious story of Damon’s fireworks plan
    • “What Nines want you to know”—straight from Damon himself

    Follow us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review:
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enneagramu/id1691530997

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    https://open.spotify.com/show/2kbIVeByJn4WDoN3kFlUId?si=65a99542c46a49fa

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    27 mins