This is the first of three episodes about hygiene and Pathological Demand Avoidance.

In this episode I focused on how to think about PDA and hygiene struggles, and understanding the root cause of struggles around:

1. Teeth brushing
2. Going to the dentist
3. Showering and bathing
4. Hair washing
5. Hand washing
6. Nail clipping
7. Hair cutting
8. Getting dressed

More specifically, in this episode I talk through:

1. The Deep Why behind hygiene struggles
2. Sensory vs. Autonomy as a root cause of avoidance
3. The cumulative nature of PDA and control coalescing around a basic need (in this case hygiene)
4. Discernment - Asking yourself the right questions about burnout and whether hygiene is the "stickiest" basic need for your child or teen.
5. Decision-making around boundaries before we worry about accommodations

I hope you find the show helpful. I'll release two more episodes on hygiene soon!

xo,

Casey

PS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.

In this episode I coach a mom of a 10-year-old PDAer who is in burnout (Pathological Demand Avoidance / Pervasive Drive for Autonomy). The child loves to cook and bake but has a meltdown if family members clean up after her while she’s in the kitchen.

She also melts down if others pass by her bedroom on the way to their own, which her mom has to do if she’s going to clean the kitchen after her daughter leaves.

We talked through if Obsessive Compulsive Disorder was also present, but decided to focus on working through the PDA lens.

We then used our decision making framework to determine how the mother could manage their bedtime routine in a way that would be more pleasant for everyone.

I hope you find the conversations helpful. It's from Parenting PDA Your Way, the show we stream live on our social media on Fridays at 1pm ET.

xo,

Casey

PS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.

In this episode I talk with our coach Donna Georgen - parent of PDA 28- and 21-year-olds - about her top tips for parenting PDA teens.

This is the second of two episodes in which Donna and I discussed this topic. In the first episode we covered five of her tips, and in this episode we cover five more.

Here they are:

1. Reflect on success
2. Normalize discomfort and fear
3. Let go of future fears
4. Pause social media as needed
5. Breathe -- you're doing great!

I hope you find our conversation helpful!

PS - Want to work with Donna to move your family forward? She offers private coaching that you can learn all about here.

In this episode I talk with our coach Donna Georgen - parent of PDA 28- and 21-year-olds - about her top tips for parenting PDA teens.

We cover five of her tips in this episode and will release another episode soon with five more.

Here's the first five:

1. Try to keep autonomy and equality at the forefront
2. Shift from parent to mentor-friend
3. Be vulnerable and transparent
4. Release the pressure to figure it all out
5. Redefine regression

I hope you find our conversation helpful!

PS - Want to work with Donna to move your family forward? She offers private coaching that you can learn all about here.

In this episode Clinical Psychologist Dr. Alex Klein and I discuss ten common misconceptions about Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy.

Here are five from Dr. Klein:

1. The parent of a PDAer is doing something wrong, especially if they've lowered demands.
2. If a PDA child did something yesterday, they can do it again today.
3. Accommodations won’t prepare PDA kids for the real world.
4. Progress made by a PDA child is measured by what we see on the surface.
5. Behaviorism (behavioral parenting) will be enough.

And here are five from me, in strong collaboration with my PDA 11- and 7-year-olds:

1. PDA kids are bad kids.
2. How much freedom PDA kids need.
3. It's not behavioral, it's stress.
4. Why and when they can hide nervous system stress.
5. Potatoes are green and they smell like poop :)

I hope the episode is helpful to you!

xo,

Casey

PS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.

This episode is for parents who are interested in toilet training in a PDA-informed way.

This the third episode in my three-part series on toileting and Pathological Demand Avoidance.

In this episode I cover toilet/potty training with your PDA child or teen. Specifically, I cover the following:

1. Is my child or teen in a good place for toilet training?
2. Story of toilet training my older son before I knew of PDA, and why I think it still worked (spoiler - we intuitively did a lot of accommodating).
3. 10 tips for if and when you decide to toilet train your PDA child or teen.

I hope this is helpful for you and your family.

xoxo,

Casey

PS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.

In this episode, I spoke to a grandmother raising her 8-year-old PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance / Pervasive Drive for Autonomy) Autistic grandson who she had been homeschooling for a year-and-a-half after school trauma in first grade.

We discussed:

- Helping her grandson attend an in-person appointment with the pediatrician, so he could get a refill of his medication.

- The different approaches she could take to decide her actions in this tough situation.

- The fear of losing trust and the progress they have made by forcing him to the doctor's office.

- Experimenting with ideas for how to prepare her grandson for the doctor's visit with an indirect mode of communications, and how to leverage his special interest of elevators to support him accessing medical care.

We hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did. It's from our live show "Parenting PDA Your Way" that I host on our social media at 1pm ET on Fridays.

Warmly,

Casey

PS - The grandma in this episode mentions our Paradigm Shift Program. Want to join the waitlist for the next cohort? Here's the link.

This is my second of three episodes about toileting and PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy).

This episode is focused on what to do if your child has challenges with:

1 - Wiping

2 - Accidents

3 - Holding and constipation

4 - Pooping outside the toilet

5 - Peeing outside the toilet

Of course, I'm talking through taking a PDA/nervous system approach to helping your child or teen with these challenges. If you want to take a deeper dive into understanding why your PDA child or teen has these challenges, please check out my previous podcast episode (Ep. 142).

Also, in this episode I mention the decision making process I teach parents who are trying to decide when they should change their child or teen's diaper if doing so causes activation. If you want to learn more about making such decisions (or others), I teach how to do so in my free masterclass: School, Screens and Siblings, Oh My! Here's a link to where you can sign up for it for free:

https://at-peace-parents-podcast.captivate.fm/sssoh

xo,

Casey