Have you ever looked at your spouse and realized you’ve become "coworkers" managing a small business called life? In this episode, we dive into the first pillar of our 4R’s Framework: Reset.

We talk about the "drift" that happens in every marriage, that quiet, slow move toward becoming roommates instead of partners, and how to intentionally pull back together. We’re breaking down the difference between a contract and a covenant, how to find the "bonfire" behind your surface-level fights, and why honesty is the only way to rebuild your foundation.

Key Discussion Points

• The 4R’s Framework Overview:
  • Reset: Starting fresh, rebuilding the base, and getting honest about what’s broken.
  • Refresh: Renewing your perspective and your emotional and physical connection.
  • Recharge: Restoring your energy, margin, and capacity for one another.
  • Restore: Rebuilding trust and healing the damage.
• The Danger of the "Drift": Marriage rarely blows up overnight; it’s usually a slow, unintentional drift into logistics and task-driven living.
• Contract vs. Covenant Thinking:
  • Contract: Me-centered; "I’ll do my part if you do yours," often leading to withholding connection based on performance.
  • Covenant: We-centered; "I’m in, even if you are struggling," based on a sacred promise rather than a mood.
• Killing the "Bonfire" of Unmet Expectations: We often fight about the dishes, but the "bonfire" is actually feeling unseen or disrespected.
• The "Vent vs. Fix" Tool: A simple question that changed our communication: "Do you need me to listen, or do you need me to provide a solution?"

You can download the 10-Day Reset HERE!

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This week felt heavy. With everything going on in the world and the sudden loss of Charlie Kirk, we wanted to sit down and talk honestly about something that every single one of us wrestles with: how do you actually disagree well?

Not just in politics or online arguments, but in your marriage, your friendships, and your faith.

We didn’t come into this episode with a script, just an urge to talk through what the Bible says about conflict, humility, forgiveness, and love when it’s hard.

Together, we walked through verses that keep us grounded (Ephesians 5:21, James 4:6, Proverbs 15:1, Colossians 3:13, Romans 12:15) and shared the real ways these play out in our own marriage, the messy arguments, the moments we’ve had to swallow pride, and the times we’ve chosen to forgive first.

This isn’t about winning debates. It’s about remembering that people matter more than being right.

It’s about guarding your words, choosing humility over pride, and learning to pause before you say something that can’t be unsaid.

We hope this conversation encourages you to slow down, reflect, and take a fresh look at how you handle conflict in your own life.

Because at the end of the day, we believe marriage, and every relationship, can be reset, refreshed, recharged, and restored.

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Most marriages don’t blow up with yelling; they drift apart in silence. It’s not the fights that break you, it’s the distance. The conversations you avoid. The nights you scroll instead of talk. The stuff you hold back. Silence convinces you everything’s fine when it’s not. And the longer you leave it, the harder it gets to close the gap.

Here’s the truth: strong marriages don’t just “happen.” Intentional couples don’t ignore the drift. They lean in. They start the awkward conversations. They ask the hard questions. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s what keeps a marriage from quietly falling apart.

In this episode of Amplified Marriage, we’re talking about what marriage drift actually looks like and how to fight it. We’re sharing:

• Our own story of drift (and how close we came to losing it all)
• How busyness and “normal life” can sneakily pull you apart
• Practical ways to close the gap (like the 10-minute pause and 15-minute couch time)
• Why conflict isn’t the enemy, but silence is
• How intentionality keeps couples connected for the long haul

This one’s real, it’s honest, and it’s for every couple that’s ever looked at each other and thought, “Is this all we’ve got left?” Spoiler: it’s not.

Episode Links & Resources

• Missed last week? Go back and listen to: “Sexual Intimacy: Why God’s Design for Sex Changes Everything.
• Email us your thoughts or questions: amplifiedmarriage@gmail.com. Join the Conversation

We’d love to hear from you:
What’s one phrase you use to start a tough conversation with your spouse? Share it with us.

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